By hnickell93 - 10/12/2012 18:37 - United States - Visalia

Spicy
Today, I realized that sex with my husband has gotten so boring that I'd rather fake an orgasm than let him continue. FML
I agree, your life sucks 34 742
You deserved it 12 780

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Yes, because having unsatisfactory sex is ALWAYS better than communicating with your spouse. You seriously need to re-evaluate your priorities.

Experiment a bit ;)

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Experiment a bit ;)

I'm sorry, but your profile image alongside with your comment gives me nightmares...

Well he was young once too!

Your a bad person

All she has to do is get on top and grind one out.

12 - I thought the exact same thing.

I'm scared you put the winky face, you remind me of Jeff goldblum's character in Jurassic park:) But I'm sure your a cool dude.

Thanks 91.

You should tell your husband that he hasn't been satisfying you.

That'll be an awkward conversation..

True, but a much needed one

Yes #2, that'll go over well. 'Oh husband, I love you but I'm not sexually satisfied.' No, OP needs to do things a little more subtly. If she speaks up and tells her hubby he's not hitting it right, hubby will be too self conscious to do ANYTHING right. No, OP just needs to mention in passing ways to spice it up, not flat out say hubby's not doing it. I guess you've never been married, #2?!? OP: spice it up a little. Mention to hubby via text or email that you're not wearing panties, or suggest visiting a toy store (in person or online). Google the top places to have sex in your area and go on a little expedition. Speak up, but in a VERY subtle way. Men can be easily offended when it comes to matters of the bedroom. Read your guy, find a way to push his button, then work him up to being more experimental. If that doesn't work, get yourself a good vibrator for when he's not in the room!!! :)

Or he should find out how to push her button ;)

54 - So she should just lie to her husband and continue to be unsatisfied? No. If they want to have a marriage that lasts, they need to be able to communicate honestly with each other. He may not like what he hears at first, but it'll be worth it in the long run. And this is coming from someone who is married.

I'm pretty sure most guys complain that they don't get our subtle hints and tell us to communicate things as straight forward as possible. OP doesn't have to put it in a way that will kill his confidence, but I'm sure he'd rather be told that he's lost his touch than find out she's faking her orgasms.

54- I'm married, my husband and I almost always talk about our sex session afterwards while smoking a cigarette. If wasn't that great we let each other know so we don't do the same positions or techniques again. If it was absolute perfection, well now we know. That's how he knows how to hit the sweet spots. Not subtly, not wearing panties, sure that's great, but it won't make her orgasm.

64, 65, 69: I'm very VERY happily married. If we get bored, we try something new. But I would never say he's not fulfilling my needs or that I'm bored with him. I never said OP should 'suffer in silence', but I think OP should branch out in healthy ways to spice up the sex life. You misunderstand my reply. OP should bring up the lack of spice and see hubby's take on his end of the fulfillment rope. There are better ways than just saying 'I would rather fake an orgasm then continue having sex with you'. OP needs to consider her hubby's feelings. Again, coming from a happy, very sexually satisfied wife.

54, it sounds like you're married to a pussy. Tell him to man up. Not all men are hypersensitive. No need to sugar coat it.

How bout this, all men are different. Some may prefer to be told straight up, while others may get offended. Solution? If your married, i would assume you know your hubby well enough to know which type he is and act accordingly.

I'm not married (technically common law) but I've been in a relationship eight years. Our sex life is great. Why? BECAUSE WE COMMUNICATE. If something isn't working, we talk about it, which sometimes means saying things like "I'm not feeling satisfied, what can we do to change this?". I'm on a medication that makes it way more difficult to reach orgasm than when I was off of it. Instead of faking them, I talked to my partner and he took me shopping for sex toys. So we implement vibrators and other stimuli to help me get there. If you can't communicate well your partner about sex (or anything, really), you're probably too immature to be in a long-term relationship.

Glad I'm not married to you

You guys are diving too deep here. It's not that hard. Climb on top and grind it out. See if you can give yourself and orgasm first. Go straight from oral to cowgirl. Works every time. If you are looking to be dicked into an orgasm every time from missionary, that's your fault not his.

Or even if all you want to do is lay on your back, rub your clit too. Guys love that.

#54 I disagree. I told my man that I wasn't really getting into the sex anymore and it wasn't really doing it for me. Did it turn out as a fight? No. Did he feel less of a man? No. Did he feel the same way I did? Yes. And we talked and fixed things and now it is back to how it was 3 years ago.

Talk to him about it. If he finds out, things can blow out of proportion unnecessarily. Besides, there are many things to do to spice up ones sex life.

Tell him to dress up as the the ups man

I agree with you 100%. The only way op's sex life will get better is if she communicates with her husband.

Maybe he just not into you?

What? Read the fml again

They're still sexually active in their marriage. He's still into her.

He was into her.......

Look at 4's name. I think he was suggesting that OP's husband has a small pecker...

clearly you guys have been married awhile since sex is now boring to you, explore yourselves a bit, try new things...

Hmm have you tried chains and whips yet?

Yes, because having unsatisfactory sex is ALWAYS better than communicating with your spouse. You seriously need to re-evaluate your priorities.

Exactly! OP needs to take some responsibility here...

Shit, I'd settle for people writing things on post-it notes in Klingon and leaving them on the food in the fridge because I am fed up of this whole 'Romance of Silence' thing. It's worrying when people feel they can't, y'know, ASK for things they want in sex. A reasonable, mature partner would be happy to consider any request that is fairly safe and consensual.

Oh god! Starwars! . o. Amazing reference

46 - I'm 99% sure you are trying to be sarcastic and witty. But that comment is probably the worst I've ever seen, bar those made but genuinely stupid people.

I don't understand how people who are having sex (especially in the context of a long-term relationship) can't have a bloody conversation about it. Hell, if anything about your relationship is bothering you, you should be able to communicate about it with your partner. I used to have a high sex drive, then I got sick and put on a bunch of medications that fuck with my libido. We TALKED about it, and have come to several solutions for if I'm in too much pain for penetrative sex, bought toys so if I'm having difficulty getting there, we can bust those out. And he went shopping WITH ME. And I got into this relationship when I was 19 (it's been 8 years). If we figured this shit out, what's wrong with everyone else?

46-you obviously know nothing about Star Wars.

I immediately thought of Ron in Sorcerer's Stone when I read your comment. "She needs to sort out her priorities!"

YDI for not even letting him know

Play sex games without touching each other. The tension should bring beast out of him. Good luck!

It takes two, babe...work on that ;)