Today, I couldn't figure out what was worse: accidentally dropping my car keys into the bottom of a filthy park lake, or getting a fishhook through my toenail in an attempt to retrieve them. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I dropped my keys in the sewer. The spare ones are inside my locked car. FML
Today, I shut my finger in the car door. The door locked. Then I dropped the keys on the ground and couldn't reach them. FML
Today, I tried to get a piece of glass out of my big toe. After an hour of poking and prodding, I finally got it out only for it to fall on the floor where I couldn't find it. Not five minutes later, I stepped on it again. FML
Today, I rescheduled my doctor's appointment for a tetanus shot to go camping with my friends. While running on a path at the camp site, I stepped on a rusty nail that went right through my shoe and into my foot. Maybe I should have kept my appointment. FML
Today, I dropped my keys in the drain. Thankfully, my new flat mate generously offered his help to reach the keys via flower pot. FML
Today, I lost a sewing needle in the carpet. No worries, my big toe found it. FML
Today, I stepped out of my car and slipped on a fresh coating of ice on the ground. I tried to catch myself by grabbing the car on my way down, but unfortunately, I was trying to grab with the hand that was holding my car keys. I key-scratched my own car. FML
Today, I dropped my keys in the toilet. While in the kitchen looking for something to fish them out with, I heard a door slam. My sister had to use the bathroom and didn’t see my keys in the toilet before sitting down. Lucky me, I caught her just as she was about to flush. FML
Today, I was at a family dinner, which had gone into meltdown after my aunt said something sarcastic about my mother's drinking. I went out for some fresh air and stumbled about in the dark, unaware of the fact that a pool was being dug. I fell into the huge hole and lost a shoe. FML
Today, I dropped some food on the floor and picked it back up, took a bite, and quickly realised it had toenail cuttings in it. I never cut my toenails in my dining room. FML
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Top comments
camoney 4
definitely the toenail
cudi504 4
definitely the fish hook through the toenail *shudder*
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Comments (177)
K1ll_J0y 0
17 dollors, whate what r we talking about.
OceanProtection 0
The 'O' and 'A' aren't even remotely in the same place.. How'd you manage to pull that one off, hmm?
jp941 5
hey my friend got one through his nipple so dont worry about it
lidemocr 0
hello tetanus shot.
bigmanj28 0
Toenails don't cost over $1000
gunman15 4
hate to be you
Northside6934 0
I say poising the keys :) sorry op
mimikinsz 0
haha for sure the getting hooked on toenail thats a no brainer
dancebabe34 0
how did the keys end up in the lake in the first place?
javierrrrm 12
so how was the lake?
fluffy_nuggets 0
(>•-•)>
javierrrrm 12
._.
XxPurplePandaxX 0