By chieftain - 09/05/2012 19:34 - Norway - T?nsberg

Today, I am defending a client on trial for perjury. She is a sweet girl and the first person I've loved in years, but she keeps doing everything she can to make herself look guilty in front of the jury. Now I'm having a daily crisis of conscience in the middle of the courtroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks 23 243
You deserved it 5 689

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Glitterhinoceros 14

You're defending her, do all the talking and tape her mouth shut or something. That doesn't look suspicious at all.

Well, at least your being professional- oh no wait...


Glitterhinoceros 14

You're defending her, do all the talking and tape her mouth shut or something. That doesn't look suspicious at all.

I pretty much aggression with what #1 said. Also, if they accuse you of anything OP just say " I never broke the law! I am the law!"

Suspicious would be hypnotizing her to talk like a robot and make sure she doesn't say anything stupid e.o

edit: agree. God damn the inventor of predictive texts !!!!

uJelly24 1

When you say love you mean love love or she's my client love?

fromthesuck 8

Wait isn't this an episode of Boston legal?

A lawyer with a guilty conscience.... What kind of sorcery is this?

skullofdarkness 18

Nahh, just give her some Elmer's "lip gloss" and you should be good. Just make sure it's non-toxic.

Then advise her as you would another client. If she's not going to win, maybe you can negotiate a plea on her behalf.

Fuck Ovechkin! Long live Crosby! Teehee c:

BassGirl 5

Do you regularly fall in love with guilty clients? Or is she a special case?

olpally 32

You should just defend her op, and do your job to the fullest extent of the law... You may love her, but is she worth it? Fyl buddy

Maybe it's his good friend he loves or girlfriend or wife?

35 - That's unlikely from the wording of the FML.

2 — She's innocent until proven guilty.

Especially in Norway, has anyone seen the trial of the guy who killed those 66 people to stop Muslims coming into Europe?

74 - you are guilty until proven innocent you noob

cheetahbaby96 8

109- You sir, are an idiot.

109 kind of has a point, as a law was passed in Norway recently stating that for hate crimes, Norwegians are guilty until proven innocent. This, however, is not a hate crime so 109 is wrong. Noob.

How does the wording make it unlikely?

"and the first person I've loved in years" I doubt it's a good friend because that sentence implies romantic love, not friends love. It's also unlikely to be a wife or girlfriend because the sentence also implies is he fell in love with the accused recently.

Judging from the thumbs, I'm guessing people don't think op(a lawyer) has a conscience. Either that, or I'm missing something. I'm probably missing something.

Us men don't have a conscious.. Just a penis

I'm a guy, and I have a conscience. WHAT DOES THAT MAKE ME?!

I think its more a case of people saying a lawyer's conscience can't get in the way of doing their job. If you're hired to defend somebody you defend them to the best of your ability, within the limits of the law....because truthfully, the law has nothing to do with your conscience and everything to do with arbitrary legal paramaters for acceptable societal behaviour.

bitter3ulogy 0

29 I think you're missing something cuz I'm a guy and I have a conscience

raiganator 10

Because **** you, thats why.

63, That's only if you accept that paradigm. Many of us put our own sense of morality above the law, and while this would make someone technically a bad lawyer, it does make them a good person - which is a far greater thing to be. Best legal practice =/= best practice.

Well, at least your being professional- oh no wait...

39- That's what happens when you try to correct someone in a haste. Epic fail.

No muzy, that's what happens when Calyx says something entirely sarcastic and it goes over your head.

Really ? and here I was thinking that they were genuinely trying to correct #4. Sarcasm is very difficult to pick up over the internet :/

You must be a shitty lawyer, you know you have a conflict of interest in this case you numbskull

Actually, no. A judge or juror would, but a lawyer is supposed to want his client to win anyway. Hence why spouses, friends, and family members often represent each other. Numbskull.

Just look at they guy's username. Obviously he's not going to learn and will still insult people like OP without proper knowledge.

just tell the jury she is insane and has no clue what she is talking about!

Yea, cuz that sure would make the jury real eager to acquit her.

The insanity defense for perjury?

They need to get BD Wong from Law and Order and work on a good psyche defense!

whatever you do op make sure you say "YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH" you'll definetly win !

torch433 1

Really? It should be an FML or something.

KriiFahMoro 9

What goes through people's minds when they post idiotic comments like this? You'd think they would already know that it's on FML for a reason...