Today, half-way through my trip to Florida, I received a call from my friend of six years. "I sort of had sex with your girlfriend while you were gone." He said it "just sort of happened." FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I checked my voicemail. I was really surprised to hear an adorable message from my boyfriend, who is vacationing in Florida. I was even more surprised to hear him having sex with some other girl for the last seven minutes of the message. FML
Today, I had dinner at my girlfriend's house with her parents. Everything was going great, until after dinner when her dad pulled me aside and told me he'd heard us having sex. I was out of town all weekend for a baseball tournament. FML
Today, I was chatting with my girlfriend and I asked her to give me her phone to make a call since mine was dead. A text came in from someone and the name sounded familiar. My best friend has been dating my girlfriend longer than I have, and she gave him head. I kissed her earlier that day. FML
Today, while having sex with the guy I have seen for about 3 years, he answered the phone. I found out that he had a girlfriend while he was inside me. FML
Today, my creepy co-worker walked up and said, "You know, I was having sex with this girl last night, and I almost said your name." FML
Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of two years. I got a call from my best friend telling me he had slept with her before we went out drinking the night before. FML
Today, my best friend of 10 years told me she had slept with a man who had a girlfriend. I told her that it wasn't that bad. She then informed me that it was my boyfriend. FML
Today, my boyfriend "accidentally" had sex with my roommate. FML
Today, I was driving 3 of my guy friends to a party that was half an hour away. There was an awkward silence for most of the trip. I just figured out why now. I've had sex with all 3 of my guy friends. They talk about it when I'm not around. FML
Today, my long distance boyfriend sent me a Snap of him fucking another girl. When he realized he'd sent it to me, he called me, trying to explain, "it's not what it looks like. It was meant for the boys." Two days ago, I made plans to visit him. Guess who's out money and single. FML
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Top comments
1PersonIsMyWorld 22
That kind of stuff doesn't just "sort of" happen. Sorry op. Ditch them both.
Pwn17 25
It's not his fault. He accidentally tripped and fell into her lady parts.
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Comments (172)
Crystal55621 19
Tell him that you're sort of pissed off.
singer0421 32
Sorry to hear it man! Dump their sorry asses and get some loyal friends
chocolatefrog28 29
I hate it when that "just sort of happens", when you spontaneously lose all your clothes at the same time as someone else and get stuck together at the pelvis. If only people could make a conscious choice to do or not do that on their own, relationships wouldn't be so hard to maintain.
Bevspeaks 11
Or she walked out of the shower while he was changing and then she tripped, fell and landed on his dick
chocolatefrog28 29
It's a dangerous world we live in, when we have to be on alert all the time for shit like that.
esines 9
An old friend betraying you would hurt worse than a new friend
perdix 31
Well, you still have the second half of your trip to Florida to get laid. Some of the hottest girls in the world are there -- or so Pitbull would have you believe ;)
Bevspeaks 11
Well, that's two exes you have now, ex-friend and ex-girlfriend
Poetaster 10
Neither of them are good for you. Dump them both and get a girlfriend that has integrity and morals. Dont waste your time on these two loosers.
ManInTheMachine 20
"Yeah man, I swear! I was asking her about the weather and poof! My dick just inside her."Either your friend suffers from black-outs or he's a shitty friend. I wouldn't keep in contact with him anymore. Or her, for that matter
Wizardo 34
His rationalisation is that he only put it in this l______o.o______l much, so it doesn't really count and it 'just happened'.
ClaireWinchester 17
At least he was honest?