Today, at the Mommy and Me dance class that I take my four year old daughter to, the instructor had us do a stretch, telling us to pretend we're mermaids. My daughter said to me, "But you're not a mermaid, you're a whale!" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I babysat for two little girls, who wanted to play 'mermaids'. I smiled, and said that I would love to play with them. The older girl laughed, saying "You can't be a mermaid. Mermaids are pretty." FML
Today, I took my 4-year-old daughter to the local pool for swim lessons. As we walked onto the deck she turned to me and said "Mom, that lady has really big boobs!" The whole pool heard, even the man my daughter was referring to. FML
Today, I got chewed out by a parent for putting her kid underwater. I teach swim lessons. FML
Today, I dyed my hair purple. I came out of the salon and a little girl walked past and said, "Wow, you look like a mermaid!", to which her mother quickly said, "No she doesn't, she looks like her parents don't love her." FML
Today, I saw my 4 year-old daughter singing and dancing, so I decided to sing along. As soon as I started singing she said, without blinking her eyes and super calmly, "Could you please stop doing that?" FML
Today, I took my two-year-old daughter swimming. While sitting in the hot tub, my daughter pointed to the elderly man sitting across from us and mumbled something. I couldn't understand her, so I asked her to repeat it. After two more attempts, she shouted, "MOM! He has big boobs!" FML
Today, my 4 year old daughter walked in while I was changing my shirt. She said "When I get older I am going to have big boobies just like you." I'm her dad. FML
Today, I overheard my 5 year old daughter call a girl in her dance class a slut. Shocked, I asked her where she heard that word. Her response: "I heard you and Daddy say it about her Mommy." FML
Today, I had to help my little sister do a first-grade project for school. For one part, they have to draw a picture of their role model. She drew a whale, and I asked, "A whale is your role model?" She laughed and said, "No! It's you!" FML
Today, while working as a swim instructor, I started singing the hokey pokey to get all the kids used to putting their faces in the water. One of the kids was covering his ears. When I asked him why, he said "because you were singing." He's 3. FML
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Top comments
mmmskittles 3
kids are so perceptive these days...
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
Aww, how cute!(:
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Comments (155)
ImKindaABigDeal 6
Hey I'm just impressed that a whale can breathe out of water long enough to even get to the dance class!
ohSNAPyall 27
+1
glitter354 0
#14- Fail...whales are mammals and they breathe air, not water.
ImKindaABigDeal 6
good point. still when was the last time you saw a whale make it all the way to a dance class?
sandyyBabi 0
never
persianjr1 7
you guys need to see little mermaid. lol
zip2014 0
finally an fml I moderated!(: and yes, FYL
smhguy97_fml 0
Loser!
RyanMacVey 17
you should be happy... whales are pretty cool (:
jess6blondie9 3
Haha I know it might sound weird, but I'd rather be a whale then a mermaid.
RyanMacVey 17
but mermaids are sexy
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
The dugong has the most human-like ******! :P
thesinginguy 18
just. like her....(:
iheart 0
Tell your daughter that you got it from birthing her and that you wouldn't be a whale if it weren't for her so she would shut it if she were grateful to live.
kingjames2306 0
wow iheart really
macrosoft 3
YDI for being fat
kennababy 0
so true
macrosoft 3
YDI for being fat
macrosoft 3
YDI for being fat
Shy_Anne 10
What type of whale ??? O_o
OCDC 9
A fail whale.