Intimacy: Today, along with my virginity, my boyfriend took my laptop,... - FML

By gerligrl97 - 12/06/2011 18:50 - United States

Spicy

Today, along with my virginity, my boyfriend took my laptop, iPhone, TV, and most of the food in my fridge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 098

You deserved it 12 694

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Same thing different taste

Gone

By december2009 - 04/01/2010 03:41 - United States

Spicy

Today, I woke up to realize that the guy who took my virginity last night also took my flat screen TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 893

You deserved it 9 970

By ROLLY - 03/03/2010 20:35 - United States

Today, my boyfriend stole a guy's cookie. As revenge, he stole my iPod. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 538

You deserved it 3 919

By Anonymous - 28/10/2010 03:27 - United States

Spicy

Today, I woke up cold. The guy I had sex with last night stole my blanket. He also took everything out of my freezer, and all of my soap, shampoo, and conditioner. The number he left me was for a pizza place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 358

You deserved it 35 051

By Shortround - 30/09/2012 12:56 - United States - Wheaton

Today, I had three things stolen: my phone, my iPod, and my girlfriend. All by the same guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 184

You deserved it 2 911

By faded as shit - 27/09/2011 01:10 - United States

Today, my parents took away my laptop, TV, Xbox, and car all because I broke up with my girlfriend. They said when I patch things up with her, I can have my stuff back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 599

You deserved it 5 357

By Sad - 28/04/2009 22:13 - United States

Today, my house got broken into. My brand new laptop was stolen, along with my flatscreen TV, digital camera, external hard drive and some clothes. Wanting to drown my sorrows in the Ben and Jerry's Phish Food ice cream in the freezer, I opened the door to find that it too had been stolen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 218 429

You deserved it 15 327

Suspicious activity

By Anonymous - 04/04/2015 04:04 - United States - Baltimore

Today, I visited my girlfriend's apartment for the first time. I guess she forgot to do some spring cleaning before I showed up, because I saw my laptop on her couch. The same laptop that was stolen from my house along with several other valuables last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 031

You deserved it 2 909

By Danielle - 06/06/2011 19:00 - United States

Today, I stayed at my boyfriend's house after mine was broken into. The robber took my laptop, jewellery, and tons of clothes. When I walked into his house, I was greeted by his brother, wearing one of my stolen shirts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 795

You deserved it 4 067

By Anonymous - 14/02/2013 20:23 - Germany

Today, my girlfriend bought herself a brand new iPad and iPod Touch, and returned my aging iPod and Kindle, which she constantly steals for her own use. She considers it my Valentine's Day present. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 898

You deserved it 3 825

By Anonymous - 09/11/2013 20:41 - United States

Today, my boyfriend moved out and took all his things with him. He also took some things that didn't belong to him, namely my rent money. My landlord comes tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 180

You deserved it 3 805

Next

Top comments

futtbuck101 1

Sunday 12 June 2011 23:30

you better get that food back

Calyx_fml 21

Sunday 12 June 2011 23:28

Yet you call him your "boyfriend".

Comments

DalekScythe 0

Monday 13 June 2011 3:15

hahaha! you dating a hobo! XD

smexilexi1215 0

Monday 13 June 2011 3:19

hahahaha y dont u breakup with him???!!!

ChuckNorrisBeard 0

Monday 13 June 2011 3:25

get railed!

kyka2008 6

Monday 13 June 2011 3:26

dang tht sucks.

mismonroe 0

Monday 13 June 2011 3:28

And then you took a bat to his windshield...?

Shadow_Phantom 26

Monday 13 June 2011 3:30

I'd definitely call the police...

joeytwix 4

Monday 13 June 2011 3:31

:(

Nyankat5 0

Monday 13 June 2011 3:35

what an ass...sucks along with your virginity :( personally I think YDI for picking him as a boyfriend...

Muwahaha_fml 4

Monday 13 June 2011 3:44

Sounds like a winner to me.

meggs2209 0

Monday 13 June 2011 3:56

since your name is girligirl 97 I'm just assuming you were born in 1997. which would make you 13 or 14. & I hope to God you didn't lose your virginity at that age. BUT maybe I'm wrong. hope so.

IHeartJimi02 0

Monday 13 June 2011 7:14

She's 15. At least she's not 14 but she is still too young.

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Roommate Music Singing TV shows Dogs Animals Relatable Sports Weird Love Cheating AITA Death Awkward Annoying Family Health Doctor Capitalism Money Work Drunk Concert Friends Coworkers Pranks Sextoys Intimacy

The Top

Today, I came across a tourist in the street asking people for directions, but nobody understood him. I speak English, so I went to help the gentleman out. He said "Knock it off with the cheesy accent, pal" and informed me that my country is a shithole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 074

You deserved it 3 564

Today, I was on a third date with a girl. Things had been going really well. At one point, the conversation lulled. After a moment of silence, she asked me what my greatest fantasy was. I told her that it was being a superhero. She told me that she meant sexual fantasy. I'm 25. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 723

You deserved it 67 809

The Top

Today, my house cleaner discovered I cross-dress as she was cleaning. She found the pretty nightgowns I wear to bed and other items. Now she wants extra money or she will make my cross dressing public. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 176

You deserved it 341

Today, it was a normal day working as a medical receptionist, until I told a wheelchair-bound patient to “take a seat” out of habit. She responded with, “I brought my own!” I have never felt more embarrassed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 858

You deserved it 293

Today, my grandpa passed away. The only emotion my dad showed was anger, because my grandpa owed my dad money. Now he wants to take it from my grandma, like he's some sort of mobster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 402

You deserved it 1 543

Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 262

You deserved it 3 046

Today, I was talking to my girlfriend on Facebook. She's in the forces, and it was her birthday. I asked her if she liked the flowers I sent her. She thanked me, then asked if she could remove our relationship status. When I asked why, she said, "It's not like we're really going out anymore." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 466

You deserved it 2 728

Today, during dinner, my mom told my dad and me in great detail about the "awesome" new cosmetic surgery idea she just had: constructing earlobes for lobeless ears, using skin taken from women's labia. I was forced to sit through this until I finished my plate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 346

You deserved it 4 293