Today, after having watched a scare story on the news about heart disease, my mom is now insisting that we have daily, hour-long, family yoga sessions together. I have a job, and barely have enough time to do my homework as it is. I'm going to be grounded if I don't take part. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I told my mom I've been taking yoga lessons, and that it'd be cool if she took some with me. She immediately went on a rant, calling yoga "satanic" and accusing me of trying to get her into "devil worship". Well, that's the last time I try to patch our relationship up. FML
Today, my mom told me to do karate with her, and so I said no. Now my mom won't let me do anything until I go do karate with her. FML
Today, my mother complained all day while I'm trying to work from home. I started getting chest pains from the stress of everything having to be perfect or she has one of her meltdowns. FML
Today, my mom heard on TV that teens need at least ten hours of sleep a day. Now she makes me go to bed at 7pm. I told her I can't finish my homework in time, and my grades will suffer. She wouldn't listen. Last week, she threatened to punish me if I don't get straight As this semester. FML
Today, my mother threatened me if I keep wearing yoga pants to school, she's going to have my dad pick me up in a speedo. FML
Today, I complained to my parents about chest pains. My mom said, "For fuck’s sake, it’s our day off. Can we just have ONE day without your drama?" Turns out, I was actually having a heart attack. She still won’t apologize, and is in fact mad at me for having a heart attack on her day off. FML
Today, it seems that I can't enjoy one fucking weekend without my mom finding work for me to do to take up my time, and I'm sick of it! FML
Today, my mom spent an hour lecturing me on how I'm a doormat who lets people walk all over me, and that I needed to be more assertive. So I stood up and told my dad, no, I am not going on that forestry camp he wants me to go to. Mom sat silently by as he screamed and grounded me for the entire summer. FML
Today, my mother admitted to me that she sends me up and down the stairs to get things for her because she thinks I could use the exercise. FML
Today, I woke up early, went to the gym, then came home and showered. When I went into my room to change, my mom woke up and started pounding on my door, screaming about how lazy and useless I was for sleeping so late. When I tried to tell her otherwise, she grounded me for "talking back". FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
MelTheGreat 23
Clone yourself.
evilplatypus 39
And? What's the problem with being grounded if you don't have any time for anything but school, homework and your job? It sounds like if you're grounded things will be just as you need them.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (206)
Country29 16
Well the fact tht you'll be stressed will defeat the purpose
Demille 0
Do what I do and stand there
Aseugremis 4
So get grounded. It's not like you have much of a life anyway.
Shadow_Blues 10
Even if she cares about your well being, I'd assume school should come first. Doesn't matter if you get grounded (unless, of course, you work on your computer), just explain to her that you have work to do, and that if you finish early, you'll join them in their workout or w/e. Hopefully, that should at least make the issue known to her.
Angelrae 5
You could always tell her that you are going to start eating heart healthy foods instead of doing yoga with her, that might make up for it :)
Dracoboxer357 36
Wow, I'm gonna be unsupportive for once....here goes... Cherish the family time, personally I wish I had an extra hour a day for yoga alone. (yes I got the part about barely having enough time as it is.) Of all the stupid shit people bitch and moan about on his site, this isn't all that bad. No, it's not a ydi, but fyl? Not by a mile, sorry.
Dracoboxer357 36
Second thought: if you agree to do the yoga willingly, you may have room to wiggle for how long. Like half an hour today, etc. I know you're busy but try to keep an open mind. You might be grateful for it in the end. :)
kaykay20 0
Keeping in shape is healthy for you so best to make to to be active during the day. Even a half an hour of exercise could help keep you healthy.
kickassnumerouno 0
Paint a dick purple.
crabbyabbie 0
being grounded is better than doing yoga so **** it
lynnlove5 0
Dude I'm sorry I know how that is my mon tries to do that shit all the time! I just talk her out of it because like you, I'm piled down by homework!:(