Today, I woke up early, went to the gym, then came home and showered. When I went into my room to change, my mom woke up and started pounding on my door, screaming about how lazy and useless I was for sleeping so late. When I tried to tell her otherwise, she grounded me for "talking back". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was grounded by my mom because I had slept in past 11, when she wanted me to wake up at seven to do chores. According to her logic, I should have seen the note she left on the counter earlier this morning. FML
Today, my mom took my cell to work with her. When she got home later, she scolded me for not answering her calls. When I pointed out that she'd taken it, she grounded me for "talking back". FML
Today, my normally very modest and prissy mom came home, pissed off about something. I asked her what was wrong, but she wouldn't say, and snapped at me to "fuck off." She then grounded me for "making" her use that kind of "vile language." FML
Today, my mom slept all day. But when she got out of bed for five minutes, she told me I was a worthless piece of shit. Then she went back to bed. FML
Today, my mom complained that I was being too loud, and she smacked my head really hard. All while screaming at me. FML
Today, after getting home from a twelve-hour shift at work, I got into bed and passed out. My mother soon woke me up, screaming that she could tell I was "fake sleeping" and ignoring her lecture on how I need to stop being so "lazy". FML
Today, my mother woke me up by loudly vacuuming the house. I had to work the next morning, so I asked her what she was thinking. She told me that if I was really tired and needed sleep, I wouldn't have woken up. It was 3 AM. FML
Today, I came home from school and went upstairs to sit on the balcony. I walked past my mom and said hello. She then got mad at me because I didn't ask how her day was. She said I should stay in my room and that I don't deserve dinner because I don't value her tasks in the house. FML
Today, I had to eat my breakfast in terrified silence, as my hungover mother staggered into the room, shouted at the kettle for not boiling fast enough, and after a few seconds, screamed that I'd sabotaged it. I'm now grounded for supposedly trying to fuck with her head. FML
Today, I wanted to do something nice for my mom. So, while she was sleeping, I cleaned the whole house for her and even made her breakfast. A few minutes later, she came downstairs and yelled at me to keep it down because she was trying to sleep. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Kiki242 19
How are we suppose to explain ourselves without talking back?
FALLENSEBZERO 16
I think it's time to move out...
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (122)
KevinFlynn 13
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
that's what ya get for talking back
dweeds508 24
She doesn't have to take being called lazy, she has a right to defend herself
lifesucks1217 6
Kevin all you do is ydi every post please shut up and get off FML
Axipiter 24
1, you should just change your name to CLU. Kevin Flynn would never say such things.
SkyGuy32 17
I agree with your profile Kevin. You do seem like an ass and a bastard.
CookieLovesBoo 16
My gym is one or two miles away , I wouldn't walk
VeganVampyre 27
107- one or two miles really isn't that long of a walk... Why is it that you go to the gym, if you apparently don't like to exercise?
FALLENSEBZERO 16
I think it's time to move out...
katiesam199 11
They might not be old enough to
FALLENSEBZERO 16
Well OP did not mention anyone taking him to the gym and by which I pressumed he drove himself there.
saxybandgeek 14
He could be old enough to drive but not old enough to move out
FALLENSEBZERO 16
I guess. It's all very different here in South Africa... Drive at 18 and move out at 18 only
CallMeMcFeelii 14
OP could have walked, ran, or rode a bicycle there. Some guys get their cardio from jogging to the gym I go to.
MrConcise 35
Emancipation is spelled 'a-l-c-o-h-o-l-i-c'. Note: Just realized people are going to jump all over the factual in accuracy of that joke, I realize that bad parental relationships will not solely get you emancipated.
Lukensz 16
Driving to the gym. That's ironic.
evilplatypus 39
33 - OP could have an A1 license. You can get that in South Africa at 16.
FALLENSEBZERO 16
#41 it happens man lol
SynysterNero 20
31- even if OP can drive they might only be 16 or 17 years old. If that's the case they would most likely still be in school and can't leave home.
queerdragon 20
I drive to the gym. But then again I live in a bad neighborhood.
FaygoAndMiracles 18
@41: Not really? The gym could be several miles away, or, they could be saving their strength for the hardcore workout instead of getting burnt out from the walking.
Lukensz 16
I didn't mean to be rude. I live in a small town and everyone I know that goes to the gym, drives there (it's really not far), which in my opinion misses the point. I don't know what it's like in a big city, but I suppose it might be harder to walk or cycle there. My apologies.
jarrettd 27
33 op is from the united states. Which means you drive at 16 move out at 18.
mecreys 7
I don't think there are many 18 year olds in America that are financially stable enough to move out
InfamousRaider 15
It's not wise to post the town you live in.
gmian 34
89- quite a few states in the US don't allow people to drive until 17..
chanellgymnast 17
Sometimes parents just don't know any better.
MDTeddy 13
These fml's are full of dumb parents. Why are these parents so dumb? Also, how can someone sleep through all of that? I would have woken up to some kind of noise...maybe.
evilplatypus 39
29 - As far as your first question goes: we hear about them on this site BECAUSE they're doing something dumb. If the parents was intelligent and wonderful, it really wouldn't be an FML, would it?
SkyGuy32 17
I would like to question the fact that the parent is mad at OP for being lazy, yet grounds OP as punishment. Wouldn't grounding OP mean that OP wouldn't be able to do anything and would therefore be more lazy?
hogman500 8
I'm my old high school you could be suspended for ditching it definitely misses the point
VeganVampyre 27
101- No, not at all. If OP is grounded there's more time to do chores and cleaning around the house since they can't go out with friends or play video games or whatever they like to do. And I'm guessing that doing stuff around the house is mainly what the mom was talking about.
feven 32
I can't tell you how annoying it is when parents won't hear you out.
Kiki242 19
How are we suppose to explain ourselves without talking back?
feldco1 17
It seems like parents would rather assume this than admit that we're right
SMHsohard 22
It's been my experience that when someone is bound and determined to act like a complete ass hat, actually listening to what the other person has to say is irrelevant.
jojimugo 20
Mime that shit or text back
myoukei 31
You can't really. I know that if i don't give a strait yes or no statement to my dad when he's irritable, i get chewed out for being "nasty and sarcastic". Sometimes, you just can't win. :/
SkyGuy32 17
Write a note to respond! Much more effective than miming.
catharsis5 9
I think OP's parents are old schools. These types of parents think that they already know everything and blame their children for any mistakes. After all, they are the "adults", they are smarter and they're always right... they could even tell what you're doing wrong even if you're nine miles away. They couldn't possibly make mistakes (even in guessing) unlike their young and stupid children.
expertsmilee 26
I bet she don't even lift...
rich443 22
Yep your mom would be what call a bitch
hallix 21
Well it's useless of her to pound on your door and yell at you.
CrissyyyS2 22
I would of gave up on explaining and just ignored her ignorant remarks.
rhapsodys 12
*have
SkyGuy32 17
And given* I think mine was a lot harder to miss.
olpally 33
Your mom is the lazy one here and an ignorant bitch. Calmly explain what you were doing.
Doritozilla 20
Well at least you know you're not lazy and you are productive. That counts for something right?