By Anonymous - 22/08/2011 19:35 - United States

Spicy
Today, a hooker refused my custom. According to her, "Even whores have standards." FML
I agree, your life sucks 23 613
You deserved it 46 746

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Give her some more money then. Bitches love money.

The way this FML is written it's so formal can you imagine how he would go up to her! "Excuse me miss, I would like to purchase your services in sexual pleasure."

Comments

Sydnayy 4

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

Don't be so sure. Besides, how do you know the OP hasn't gotten laid before?

tylersign 11

1, you go to Hogwarts? How's Dumbledore doing?

Well I guess even scum has standards.

MichellinMan 20

Hey 32 you gotta hooker like photo. So do hookers really have standards? Mine don't.

I read that she lived in Hogwarts, England and realised that I was worse by knowing that Hogwarts is based in Scotland.

xoconnie 8

lmao! just an educated guess by the reaction of the hooker and good burn 45.

Funny, i just watched a **** vid named scum :P

jake3292 5

Hey 55 if it's not you it's not true

enonymous 8

EVEN GATOR'S BITCHES HAVE STANDARDS AND BEST BE USING JIMMIES

I won't judge but can see before pics before I support yuh :p

enonymous 8

32 Jesus is not an asshole. He rides raptors and turns water into ruffiecoladas. he is clearly awesome

With a name like Canadianbabe420 and the picture I'd say 45's assumption was spot on.

coffeygirl12 14

Its ok, u dont want her STDs anyway.

Hookers are people to OP ik i use to think they were majestical creatures.

The way this FML is written it's so formal can you imagine how he would go up to her! "Excuse me miss, I would like to purchase your services in sexual pleasure."

Im sure he will in time. One day he'll find his perfect woman that loves him the way he is... Maybe. If she's blind. Deaf too. maybe out of options too. But she'll love him the way he is!

Instead of I Just Had Sex, you'll be more like the remix I Just Held Hands on YouTube.

OP deserves it for asking his mom to have with him in the first place ! ohhh ! burnn:)

If it wasn't for date rape I'd never get laid.

raspackman 0
eckksDeeitsTravi 0

156 - Ok, really? As much as it's funny to make immature your mom jokes from time to time, that time has long since passed when it was cool to pass your mom around.

OP is probably a virgin. To the sane extent as my olive oil. Extra virgin.

I'm sorry, but could anyone explain what this FML means?? Thanks

omgcookeys 15

How is it their fault they look a certain way??

getting denied by the hooker, he asked her in the first place.

OP did deserve it he hired a hooker in the first place just get a gf or wife

YDI for getting a hooker, you desprate STD magnet.

OP.. Sucks that you got denied by a hooker. But, YDI for hiring one in the place.

Why do people worry so much about getting STDs from hookers? I mean, are condoms illegal where you all live?

Theres plenty of fish in the sea my friend

What does he mean by "she refused my custom"

I don't think it's the smell he's worried about.

I think if he could get fish... He wouldn't need a proffessional to start with...

BelleBelle_fml 11

#22- It means he approached her wanting to pay her for her 'services' and she refused him because apparently even ****** have standards.

giggleprincess 0

Unless the fish happened to be in the oil spills...

There's also a bunch of hoes in the street.

n_epic_fail 14

more like plenty of fish in the tiny pond that will accept such low standards.

XxgreymoonxX 8

I like how the guy who posts 'there are many fish in the sea' has a pic of a cat as his profile pic x3

XxgreymoonxX 8

I like how the guy who posts 'there are many fish in the sea' has a pic of a cat as his profile pic x3

aFatFuck 0

That there is my friend...and sometimes you have to resort to catching rotten tuna..

bizarre_ftw 21

o yes cuz there's plenty of prostitutes out there

Give her some more money then. Bitches love money.

MCVelvet1497 3

Are you trying to be funny? Or is your mom a bitch?

Matias_Says_FML 4

Yea, so then she can knock your ass down by surprise and run with your money!

emodude44 0

I like the way you think. Tie down the hooker, have your way then let her go. Now she can't steal your wallet when you go to sleep!

"Bitches also love sonnets" -Shakespeare

diva_lulu 0

u totally deserved it haha :p but that's sad

funkyspacemonkey 0

how..da ****.? did the monkey, take a bite out of that banana..?? with his helmet on..

And why does the monkey have a helmet on its tail?

Androidz 0

And other loose things if you know what I mean

Hammer940 7

High standards and loose morals. Love it.

tweetypie 18

awesome!!! exactly. that's why god gave you hands.

Everybody who's anybody has VD.The free clinic is the new VIP section.

KiddNYC1O 20

Well, everybody knows somebody that knows somebody that knows somebody.

And that's where the B-rated comedy starts.