Today, a few of my friends arranged for us to go skinny-dipping with the guy I really like. It went really well, until a turd surfaced before our eyes. After we scrambled out of the pool in panic, my crush called us all freaks and left. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I went skinny dipping with a few friends at my friend's house. It was really fun until one of my friends shrieked, saying there were bugs in the pool. Everyone jumped out and looked at her. Turns out the "bugs" she saw was my body hair. FML
Today, I was at a friend's pool party. He lives on a lake and one of our friends wouldn't get in the water. My best friend and I decided to push him off the dock. Once we had, I turned to see my crush who had watched looked shocked, then said, "You know he can't swim right?" FML
Today, my friend and I decided to go skinny-dipping in her pool just after we'd finished watching a scary movie. While we were in the pool, I heard something move in the bushes so I freaked out and ran onto the deck, slipping and falling flat on my back. Her dad saw the whole thing. FML
Today, a bunch of friends and I went skinny dipping in a pond. The guys all grabbed the ladies' underpants and waved then around. My bloody pad was inside of one of them. FML
Today, I went skinny-dipping with my best friend. We were on the beach and it was fairly crowded but we got in the water at this really secluded area. While we were swimming I looked up to see a homeless man wearing my clothes, walking away. FML
Today, I was at a pool party with some friends. We decided to play chicken and I was on the shoulders of the guy I like. Right as we started playing, for some unearthly reason my body decided to let out a little pee. I thought he wouldn't notice since we were already wet. He did. FML
Today, at the public pool, my boyfriend dived from one side to the other. I jumped in to reward him underwater, kissing him everywhere and grabbing his crotch, until I noticed his shorts were different. I surfaced to see that my boyfriend was still far away. FML
Today, marks the third day I've spent with a cute guy who has a crush on me. Before going to a public pool, we had a nice breakfast together. However, the food did not agree with me, so I loudly emptied my guts in the poolside restroom. He sent me home after, and will no longer answer my texts. FML
Today, I dove into the water perfectly, and my bikini bottoms came off. I splashed around nervously. This guy must have thought I was drowning, and dove in to save me. He emerged from the water carrying a half naked girl. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I went for a swim in his pool. I was hoping that the swim would be somewhat romantic, however, that came to an abrupt end when he decided that it would be cool and funny to try and lift me up by my boobs. FML
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Top comments
Nyx_fml 23
I wouldn't discard the possibility of him being the culprit and saying that to divert suspicions.
DocBastard 40
I've heard of being **** blocked, but never caca blocked.
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Comments (102)
Mauskau 36
It's a floater!!
JMichael 26
36- plot twist! I said it too!!! No but I think we all know who shit in the pool..
punz 7
To bad the turd didn't have a coke bottle stuck in it, the good doctor, DocBastard, probably could've helped identify the som-bitch.
FMLitsFire 4
you people obviously haven't read the book 'everyone poops'.
montecarlo1979 4
Was probably him
sanecatlady 13
That's so gross! As if peeing in the water wasn't bad enough. Hope the chlorine killed the germs.
skyeyez9 25
Who is so lazy, they can't exit a pool to use a restroom when they have to poop? Turds don't just "slip out." You have to make an effort to push a log out of your butt. Also....where did it surface? I mean, did it float up next to the boy? Or one of your friends? It may indicate who did it.
buddy_J 16
You thought it would be a good idea for a group of people to go swimming naked?
splitintwo 6
I would have thought yall were freaks for arranging a skinny dipping run with a guy youre not close to. Go on a date first...
mattrd_fml 31
maybe it was just a baby ruth.