Today, I was cleaning out my bedside table when I came across some condoms I bought on my 18th birthday, to use the first time I had sex. They expired five years ago. I'm still waiting for my first time. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my friends were all talking about the first time they bought condoms. I can still remember the first time I bought them; in fact they are unopened and expired in my bedside table. FML
Today, the condoms I bought a few years ago as a celebration of dumping my girlfriend due to a lack of sex, have expired. Every last one of them. FML
Today, I was cleaning out from underneath my bed and found a used condom. I've never had sex in my own room. FML
Today, I was cleaning out my room and picked up my bed and found a condom. I'm 15 and still a virgin. FML
Today, I had to throw away twenty condoms that were all expired, because that's how active my sex life is. FML
Today, I found a used condom in my bed. I haven't had sex in months and now I'm terrified. FML
Today, I haven't had sex for so long that my condoms have gone off. FML
Today, I was cleaning my older brother's room in my mom's house after he had just moved out with his girlfriend. I guess I was multitasking a little too much and not paying too much attention to what I was doing and I realized 15 seconds later, I was holding a used condom in my right hand. FML
Today, I realized I bought 30 condoms last year. I now have 29. FML
Today, I whacked off with a condom on and left it in the living room waste basket so it looked like I finally had sex with someone. FML
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Top comments
imajinethat 0
Well, the good news is, you just got ****** by life. :) Congrats.
Animati0n 0
So? It's not a bad thing.
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Comments (257)
Naheelawhatwhat 0
hell no #153 I'm not embarrassed at all.....I just chose to remain unnoticed on a pointless site which happens to be NON social networking. so therefore pointless. You should probably remained anonymous as well because you look like whitetrash shit with a bad perm.....You were probably better off as a question mark. :)
Lemon0642 0
Im with u man! Im still a virgin too, the difference, i'm 14.
golfcrzy 0
to everyone saying way to wait...that is not this persons choice. Dont be trying to get laid. it wont happen that way. wait for someone you really care about, know and love. it will make it that much better. DONT hire an escort or a prosititue. they can have diseases (and then NO ONE will want to be with you) and it could be a very bad experiance. #182 please dont do it jst to do it. it wont be worth it and you will regret it. To everyone who didn't know that condoms expire: you are idiots and should not be partaking in any activities that may result in pregnancy. you should have seen EXPIRE: (insert date here) on the back of the package. to everyone: it is not jst sex. it is your life, and the actions you do affect the rest of your life in some way, shape, or form. try not to do things that you think you mite regret (and if you think you mite, you shouldn't do it). jst be happy
Heelix 0
YDI VIRGIN!!! must be ugly or socially retarded
AutumnsMonologue 0
woot go virgins!
Light_Ty 0
...Is it shameful to stay a virgin and not risk getting F'd up STD's?!? Even with "protection" people can get pregnant and pass STDs
1xbananax1 0
U should save it for marriage or just say that
rachelbrianna25 0
wow. = ( poor thing. get a toy @ least. = ) lol.
jessb_fml 0
If you really want to get laid so bad, surely it can't be that difficult can it?
QueenBouta 0
Just do it already! become Bi-sexual... you cant find sex, so Buy it!!!!!!!!!