Today, I was cleaning out my bedside table when I came across some condoms I bought on my 18th birthday, to use the first time I had sex. They expired five years ago. I'm still waiting for my first time. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my friends were all talking about the first time they bought condoms. I can still remember the first time I bought them; in fact they are unopened and expired in my bedside table. FML
Today, the condoms I bought a few years ago as a celebration of dumping my girlfriend due to a lack of sex, have expired. Every last one of them. FML
Today, I was cleaning out from underneath my bed and found a used condom. I've never had sex in my own room. FML
Today, I was cleaning out my room and picked up my bed and found a condom. I'm 15 and still a virgin. FML
Today, I had to throw away twenty condoms that were all expired, because that's how active my sex life is. FML
Today, I found a used condom in my bed. I haven't had sex in months and now I'm terrified. FML
Today, I haven't had sex for so long that my condoms have gone off. FML
Today, I was cleaning my older brother's room in my mom's house after he had just moved out with his girlfriend. I guess I was multitasking a little too much and not paying too much attention to what I was doing and I realized 15 seconds later, I was holding a used condom in my right hand. FML
Today, I realized I bought 30 condoms last year. I now have 29. FML
Today, I whacked off with a condom on and left it in the living room waste basket so it looked like I finally had sex with someone. FML
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Top comments
imajinethat 0
Well, the good news is, you just got ****** by life. :) Congrats.
Animati0n 0
So? It's not a bad thing.
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Comments (257)
emodrew 0
agree with #9... how do condoms expire????
emodrew 0
Hi, I wrote # 170, and just wanted to say: Thanks to #21 who KINDLY answered the question....unlike 34, 47, etc
KorbenDeck 5
get a hooker
myfairyoshi_fml 0
#25 you win at life.......... XD
Burner2K0 0
Lol @ #7 Im 15 and a virgin and I know ppl my that lost it and I'm not crying over it, well I think about it but who cares, WAIT BUDDY!!!!!!
ericabella18 0
at least you're safe from diseases and stuff like that i guess ? hahaaaa #7 & 24 to #174, you're 15 and you're comparing the fact that YOURE still a virgin to that fact that this twenty something guy is still a virgin? are all your friends *****? xD
56578 0
well, at least you won't get an STD? And, its not really as big a deal as some people make it.
oompaaa 0
do you still live at home? maybe thats you problem
larforever 0
hey your saving yourself, some girl will appreciate that one day ;) good for you, im proud
FMLfangirl89 0
ROFL! you're 23 and still a virgin? FYL cuz you suck at it. either that or reeeeeeeeally unfortunate looking and/or very fat.