Today, I was cleaning out my bedside table when I came across some condoms I bought on my 18th birthday, to use the first time I had sex. They expired five years ago. I'm still waiting for my first time. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my friends were all talking about the first time they bought condoms. I can still remember the first time I bought them; in fact they are unopened and expired in my bedside table. FML
Today, the condoms I bought a few years ago as a celebration of dumping my girlfriend due to a lack of sex, have expired. Every last one of them. FML
Today, I was cleaning out from underneath my bed and found a used condom. I've never had sex in my own room. FML
Today, I was cleaning out my room and picked up my bed and found a condom. I'm 15 and still a virgin. FML
Today, I had to throw away twenty condoms that were all expired, because that's how active my sex life is. FML
Today, I found a used condom in my bed. I haven't had sex in months and now I'm terrified. FML
Today, I haven't had sex for so long that my condoms have gone off. FML
Today, I was cleaning my older brother's room in my mom's house after he had just moved out with his girlfriend. I guess I was multitasking a little too much and not paying too much attention to what I was doing and I realized 15 seconds later, I was holding a used condom in my right hand. FML
Today, I realized I bought 30 condoms last year. I now have 29. FML
Today, I whacked off with a condom on and left it in the living room waste basket so it looked like I finally had sex with someone. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
imajinethat 0
Well, the good news is, you just got ****** by life. :) Congrats.
Animati0n 0
So? It's not a bad thing.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (257)
kaylahlee 0
aww. i feel so bad for you :(
penguaro 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
ur fat
hannahtaskey 9
why would you say that to someone? **** off.
Fireashes250 16
You won't even show your face #249. How do we know you aren't a desperate idiot trying to get attention and trying to make other people feel bad to make yourself feel better.
MrNiceGuy569 18
LOVE THAT PICTURE I HAVE IT ON MY PHONE!
scorpioserpent 1
woww that's pretty sad o_0
z_caroline_z 0
There there.
Animati0n 0
So? It's not a bad thing.
migueljm5 18
For guys yes it is
imajinethat 0
Well, the good news is, you just got ****** by life. :) Congrats.
nitrogirl 0
haha agreed that should count fer something...right??:)
SasuNaru_fml 0
Hmm... your day will come I suppose. :)
CousinSkeeter 0
I didnt know condoms expired lol
winterharte 0
They do when the lube is no longer... slick.
musigreg 0
well... your mother might be happy with this ?
ballwiz23 0
soo hot
DreMaMa 0
Good thing you were prepared. Bad thing you had nothing to be prepared for besides PALMela
SturmFireforge 0
Boo ******* hoo. I'm sick of these "I haven't got laid in a while/ever" submissions. They're not FMLs. D: