Today, I was cleaning out my bedside table when I came across some condoms I bought on my 18th birthday, to use the first time I had sex. They expired five years ago. I'm still waiting for my first time. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my friends were all talking about the first time they bought condoms. I can still remember the first time I bought them; in fact they are unopened and expired in my bedside table. FML
Today, the condoms I bought a few years ago as a celebration of dumping my girlfriend due to a lack of sex, have expired. Every last one of them. FML
Today, I was cleaning out from underneath my bed and found a used condom. I've never had sex in my own room. FML
Today, I was cleaning out my room and picked up my bed and found a condom. I'm 15 and still a virgin. FML
Today, I had to throw away twenty condoms that were all expired, because that's how active my sex life is. FML
Today, I found a used condom in my bed. I haven't had sex in months and now I'm terrified. FML
Today, I haven't had sex for so long that my condoms have gone off. FML
Today, I was cleaning my older brother's room in my mom's house after he had just moved out with his girlfriend. I guess I was multitasking a little too much and not paying too much attention to what I was doing and I realized 15 seconds later, I was holding a used condom in my right hand. FML
Today, I realized I bought 30 condoms last year. I now have 29. FML
Today, I whacked off with a condom on and left it in the living room waste basket so it looked like I finally had sex with someone. FML
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Top comments
imajinethat 0
Well, the good news is, you just got ****** by life. :) Congrats.
Animati0n 0
So? It's not a bad thing.
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Comments (257)
kcg4305 0
Its not the end of the world if you are still a virgin. You should wait to have sex until your with someone who you are in love with. It doesn't matter, wait until you're in love.
UGADawg08 1
I don't see how this is an FML. You've still got your virginity. You didn't lose it at 14 to some meaningless ***** at school, followed by a dozen STD-ridden bar ****** in later years. Wait until you meet the right person. Stop worrying about it.
wowfmlife 0
How long do condoms last for?? I'm 15 and planning to wait for marraige but just wondering... xD
mylifeisFML56 0
I'm worried by the people who thought condoms last forever, thats how people get unwanted pregnancy and std's...
notyouraverage 0
I dont understand people who wait till mariiage. What happens when the two end up not being sexually compatible with each other? yes it does happen, different styles, different sizes. . .
spirited_away33 0
This is not an FML!!! what the heck is wrong with you. If you really want to get laid that bad, go do something about it!! I bet you just think a woman's going to magically appear at your bed...no. btw, all the people who thought condoms didn't expire are idiots.
ceecee794 0
look on the bright side....at least you know you that you haven't contracted any stds
GrapefruitZoe 0
#13, condoms expire...they get little holes if they overheat, and stuff...
annahoward 0
sex is overrated. okay,not really,but....i feel sorry for you?
FadedPurplez 0
YDI, for pitying yourself?! xD Well- Go get them tigerrrrr!