Today, my boyfriend asked me to 'spice things up in the bedroom'. When I asked how, he said I could try wearing a paper bag over my head. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend put a paper bag over my head while we had sex. Her reason? Because she thinks she is so good in bed she was worried I'd hyperventilate due to all the excitement. Instead I fainted due to lack of oxygen after three minutes. FML
Today, my girlfriend asked if we could spice up our sex life. She didn't think it was too funny when I laid out all of our spices on the bed. She now refuses to have sex. FML
Today, my boyfriend admitted that he'd like to dress me in a squirrel suit and chase me through the forest. This was the surprising result of a discussion on how to spice up our love life. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky. He pulled off my panties and was about to go down on me when he said, "Wait, what's this white thing?" It was a piece of toilet paper. FML
Today, my boyfriend said he wanted to try something new. By something new, it was to put flour in my butt and see what would happen if I farted. FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to make me wear a fake mustache during sex. He said it "turns him on." FML
Today, I told my long-distance boyfriend that I'd like to throw my legs over my head and have him cram his dick deep inside me. He told me to order a pizza, "It'd be more fun." FML
Today, as my boyfriend and I were messing around in his room, he took off my underwear. As he was about to go down on me, I spread my legs to help out. He then looked up at me and said, "You got some toilet paper left behind." FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to spice up our sex life. He suggested incorporating bacon. He was serious. FML
Today, I tried to spice things up in the bedroom by making love to my husband in a tight leather corset. I ended up passing out. FML
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Top comments
RayeofSunshine 0
Please tell me you're never going to have sex with him again if he's going to disrespect you like that. You should dump his ass. You deserve better.
nerdsgetmehot 23
If you haven't dumped him yet, I suggest doing so. Don't put up with that. If you do put up with that, then you deserve it! Stand up for yourself.
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Comments (82)
ultra_notorious 26
poor girl, that's what we call BROWN BAGGIN IT!
ultra_notorious 26
dude should have dumped the chick first, must be really desperate for some play if he wants to brown bag it!
sochaboy 0
He put a bag on your head? Still counts! You just had seeeeeexxx and it felt so good! You let him put his penis inside of you!
Courtney_Sanders 6
Only if he has to wear a bra and lipstick and say "I'm a dirty girl". Two can play that game.
aperfectxdeath 3
You people telling her to dump him haven't thought it through. If she's ugly enough to need a paper bag, who else would she date? Hahaha. Someone is better than no one, and bad sex is better than no sex.
TheThrasher_fml 0
This is a reference to the episode of South Park "Chef Aid"
StzaCrack666 18
im surprised it took 3 pages for that to get noticed
ouin ouin 5
Some guys are assholes... Solution dump his ass and find a knew one
leahree 23
Lol that's horrible
FabCee 18
ouch lol
peterblack67 9
And he's still your boyfriend? Sweetie you can do much better. You deserve way more respect than that.