Intimacy: Sweet talker

Sweet talker

By Anonymous - 21/04/2011 13:47 - United States

Today, my boyfriend said to me, "You know how I know I love you? I don't want you to leave after we have sex." He thinks that's a compliment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 352

You deserved it 12 913

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Same thing different taste

By 2ndchoice - 12/12/2009 15:47 - Belgium

Today, my boyfriend wanted to tell me how much he loves me. He said a lot of wonderful things, such as not being able to live without me and hoping that I would want to live with him and marry him someday. He ended his loving speech with his ex-girlfriend's name instead of mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 008

You deserved it 2 927

By Anonymous - 22/03/2013 23:21 - Canada - Oakville

Today, I was feeling a bit insecure about my body, and I told my boyfriend I don't know how he can even stand to have sex with me. He replied, "I know, right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 395

You deserved it 19 263

By robm - 26/07/2010 20:15 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he told me I was the love of his life. Afterwards, he clarified his statement. I was the love of his life, because I was in his life at that moment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 420

You deserved it 4 668

By Anonymous - 16/08/2014 02:16 - Australia - Notting Hill

Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me. I asked why, and he said "Because sometimes you look good, and you buy me stuff." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 962

You deserved it 7 243

So hard

By JessicaandGhazi - 09/06/2020 08:04

Today, my boyfriend and I were laying in bed after having sex. I commented on him still having an erection after having an orgasm. He said it happens whenever he has a strong orgasm. Then he added, "And surprisingly, I was even thinking about you when it happened." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 644

You deserved it 305

Classy

By Username - 07/06/2011 06:51 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were making out when he sweetly whispered in my ear, "It's not gonna suck itself." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 964

You deserved it 13 037

Bad timing

By KrissyBearr - 31/12/2011 01:36 - United States

Today, while having sex, I told my boyfriend that I loved him. I could feel him go soft inside me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 407

You deserved it 10 011

By confused - 28/09/2011 04:55 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend told me that having sex with me was as good as eating crispy bacon. I don't know if I should feel complimented. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 206

You deserved it 8 722

By dummy - 17/02/2012 00:03 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky in bed. He mumbled something that sounded like "I love you." I replied "I love you too baby", to which he laughed then said, "I said I wanted you to blow me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 724

You deserved it 5 663

By not impressed - 09/10/2015 18:27 - Canada - Nanaimo

Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He replied, dead serious, "That's nice and all, but anal speaks louder than words." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 315

You deserved it 4 601

Nurisaintlucy 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 18:44

This is a compliment, usually if a guy didn't care about you he wouldn't stay for the cuddling

skitzofreniks 5

Thursday 21 April 2011 18:54

the sooner you understand a guys compliments, the longer you stay in a relationship with us.

Comments

dirtyblond 4

Thursday 21 April 2011 19:47

Awwwh & I thought his comments were ORIGINAL. >:/

lolyourlifesucks 5

Thursday 21 April 2011 19:48

it is a compliment! he could have just kicked you out of the bed at any time!

ceddyz17 10

Thursday 21 April 2011 19:56

that's a complament

MyScrewedUpLifeS 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 19:57

ouch.

silverracer 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 20:04

this op is stupid its a compliment he was trying to be sweet get over urself

agummere796 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 20:08

well, he might not be the brightest, but he tried....

agummere796 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 20:09

He might not be the brightest, but he tried..

notquite69 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 20:11

What a bitch!

Garytt 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 20:13

he tried

TeenieAmerica 9

Thursday 21 April 2011 20:20

Um, that IS a compliment. Would you rather him kick you out afterward?

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend told me that in order for me to be considered for marriage, I need to prove that I can be a subservient woman. This includes signing over the deed to my house, my car, and all my banking assets, so that he can be “the man of the house.” I make 6 figures; he rents with roommates. FML

I agree, your life sucks 770

You deserved it 147

Today, I was having sex with my husband. As I was undressing, he said, "Arr, I spy me some booty!" I let it go, I'm used to his embarassing pirate talk. But as he orgasmed, he screamed, "I'VE FOUND THE BURIED TREASURE!" My neighbors heard in the apartment next door and called to let me know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 198

You deserved it 7 092

The Top

Today, I entered my first professional fight as a mixed martial artist. It's been my dream to become a UFC champion one day. All I do is train and watch UFC fights all day. I was out cold in a matter of seconds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 752

You deserved it 27 747

Today, after repeatedly telling my partner's family that our daughter is allergic to peanuts, his grandfather decided to feed her one, to "see if she really is allergic." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 265

You deserved it 64

Today, I wore what I thought was a hideous sweater from the thrift store for an ugly sweater contest. I've gotten more compliments on it than anything else I've ever worn. I can't even succeed at failure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 548

You deserved it 3 900

Today, my wardrobe door jammed, and I couldn't change out into some nice clothes for my date. On the way there, my car broke down. Not wanting to be late and make a bad impression, I scuttled the rest of the way, only to find I'd been stood up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 938

You deserved it 2 375

Today, I fell asleep on the couch and my boyfriend thought it would be cute to carry me to bed. He knocked my head on the door frame and I pretended it didn't hurt because he felt so bad, but I shouldn't have. I was rushed to the hospital hours later with a concussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 920

You deserved it 666

Today, my grandmother saw me for the first time in years. "Not all your clothes have to be as tight as condoms, you tramp," is probably the nicest greeting she's ever given me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 302

You deserved it 9 121