Intimacy: Sweet talker - FML

Sweet talker

By Anonymous - 21/04/2011 13:47 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend said to me, "You know how I know I love you? I don't want you to leave after we have sex." He thinks that's a compliment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 352

You deserved it 12 913

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Same thing different taste

By 2ndchoice - 12/12/2009 15:47 - Belgium

Today, my boyfriend wanted to tell me how much he loves me. He said a lot of wonderful things, such as not being able to live without me and hoping that I would want to live with him and marry him someday. He ended his loving speech with his ex-girlfriend's name instead of mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 008

You deserved it 2 927

By Anonymous - 22/03/2013 23:21 - Canada - Oakville

Today, I was feeling a bit insecure about my body, and I told my boyfriend I don't know how he can even stand to have sex with me. He replied, "I know, right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 395

You deserved it 19 263

By robm - 26/07/2010 20:15 - United States

Spicy

Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he told me I was the love of his life. Afterwards, he clarified his statement. I was the love of his life, because I was in his life at that moment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 420

You deserved it 4 668

By Anonymous - 16/08/2014 02:16 - Australia - Notting Hill

Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me. I asked why, and he said "Because sometimes you look good, and you buy me stuff." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 962

You deserved it 7 243

So hard

By JessicaandGhazi - 09/06/2020 08:04

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were laying in bed after having sex. I commented on him still having an erection after having an orgasm. He said it happens whenever he has a strong orgasm. Then he added, "And surprisingly, I was even thinking about you when it happened." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 644

You deserved it 305

Classy

By Username - 07/06/2011 06:51 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were making out when he sweetly whispered in my ear, "It's not gonna suck itself." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 964

You deserved it 13 037

Bad timing

By KrissyBearr - 31/12/2011 01:36 - United States

Spicy

Today, while having sex, I told my boyfriend that I loved him. I could feel him go soft inside me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 407

You deserved it 10 011

By confused - 28/09/2011 04:55 - Australia

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend told me that having sex with me was as good as eating crispy bacon. I don't know if I should feel complimented. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 206

You deserved it 8 722

By dummy - 17/02/2012 00:03 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky in bed. He mumbled something that sounded like "I love you." I replied "I love you too baby", to which he laughed then said, "I said I wanted you to blow me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 724

You deserved it 5 663

By not impressed - 09/10/2015 18:27 - Canada - Nanaimo

Spicy

Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He replied, dead serious, "That's nice and all, but anal speaks louder than words." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 315

You deserved it 4 601

Next

Top comments

Nurisaintlucy 0

Thursday 21 April 2011 18:44

This is a compliment, usually if a guy didn't care about you he wouldn't stay for the cuddling

skitzofreniks 5

Thursday 21 April 2011 18:54

the sooner you understand a guys compliments, the longer you stay in a relationship with us.

Comments

hanny25 0

Friday 22 April 2011 6:20

well it is a compliment... what more can you ask from a guy? lol at least he didn't ask you to make him a sandwhich...

CaughRedHanded 0

Friday 22 April 2011 6:25

I guess it means your good in the sack?

sammi955 0

Friday 22 April 2011 6:30

well at least he us trying, doesn't that count as something?

jessdanceaway 0

Friday 22 April 2011 6:34

Lol that was really funny. But it made sense-.-

caracherries 0

Friday 22 April 2011 6:42

definitely a compliment. with that said though, I guess I don't love my fiancé, seeing as how I'm the one who kicks him out of the bed afterward.

fmler691 0

Friday 22 April 2011 7:17

what's more important here is that for some reason you don't think this is a compliment

xrudeboyrock 29

Friday 22 April 2011 8:02

......is it not?

JokersChild310 0

Friday 22 April 2011 8:09

it is

dnd619 0

Friday 22 April 2011 8:27

your bf is right!

stephanyk2 7

Friday 22 April 2011 9:01

that is a compliment, it's just how guys are. life isn't a fairytale, there's no such thing as perfect. plus even if a guys said that to me I'd laugh, it is a compliment.

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I were in our room getting hot and heavy. As he was entering me, he started making electronic whirring sounds. Once inside, he said in a robotic voice, "Initiating launch sequence in 3... 2... 1..." and began thrusting as fast as possible. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 697

You deserved it 9 548

Today, as I was trying to impress my girlfriend of three months, I showed her the real diamond ring I'd got for my ex. She got an attitude for our whole three-hour car ride home because I'd brought up my ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61

You deserved it 1 325

The Top

Today, I learned that when blender jars aren't locked, they fly off the blender, into the air, hit you in the head and explode all over your kitchen. Today, I also learned that after I'm attacked by a flying blender, the first thing my boyfriend asks is if I'm still gonna make him a smoothie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 829

You deserved it 13 105

Today, my girlfriend and I broke up. When I got home from work, I came home to glitter. EVERYWHERE. Guess who forgot to get the key to his apartment back from his ex-girlfriend. The guy who's having his family over for dinner tonight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 462

You deserved it 13 068

Today, I had a very hot sex dream about my female coworker. It was so good I woke up practically rock hard, jerked off, and had an amazing orgasm. There’s just one problem: I’m a gay guy, in a committed relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 435

You deserved it 653

Today, my vet prescribed Xanax for my very anxious dog, because he keeps me awake all night whining and pacing. He slept soundly for about an hour, then woke up, threw up all over my carpet, and went right back to whining and pacing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 809

You deserved it 1 708

Today, I awoke to the sound of my neighbors attacking my car with a baseball bat accusing me of calling the cops on them. I did call the cops on them, after they screamed at me last night, drunkenly, to call the cops for them because they thought they were being robbed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 966

You deserved it 1 789

Today, after I finally got the money for a pool, I built a deck, filled it a quarter of the way, then all the 4x4 beams collapsed. The pool ripped in half, flooding the yard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 284

You deserved it 874