Sampled

By zachhewett - 02/02/2016 22:53 - United States - Birmingham

Spicy
Today, at my job drug testing high schoolers, I noticed that one of the kids selected for a test looked incredibly high. After he went into the bathroom and gave me his cup with his urine inside, I took a closer look… to see that the little shit had jizzed in the cup. I hate my job. FML
I agree, your life sucks 28 366
You deserved it 2 855

Same thing different taste

Comments

And I thought working in retail was bad. FYL OP.

As an 18 year old I'd like to apologize in the behalf of my shitty generation. Contrary to popular belief we all don't act like the asshat mentioned here. Sorry you had to deal with this, OP.

What the hell kind of school do you work at? I can't believe the school has such a prevailing drug problem that they need regular testing.

Drug testing in high schools is usually for athletes, last chance schools or private schools. It's part of the condition of being accepted into the programs. Some public schools probably use the deal as a kind of probation. You get caught smoking weed but you're a GOOD kid, instead of expelling you they say you need to do a weekly drug test. You shape up, they sweep it under the rug.

I have 2 sons in high school in Texas and the UIL who govern all extra curricular activities requires the school to have random drug screening done. If you don't want to be screened don't participate in extra curricular activities. The parents have to sign consent forms for them to do it.

I've always hated the urine testing jobs and shit, never knew they get this weird. Now I hate such jobs more

ACCOUNTKILLER 18

why the hell are kids being drug tested!?! what happened to medical discretion?

I'm sorry OP but as an FML, it's pretty dang funny! Glad I am not the one handling those samples, though!

The drug war loons invade enough people's privacy, do we really need to extend this to teenagers ? Do you work at some kind of correctional facility?

Yes since 1 in 4 people who take drugs before 18 will get addicted, not get the help they need early enough, and ruin their lives

I always find ironic that the country that calls itself “Home of the Free” feels compelled to do drug testing in high school. It’s one thing to bust someone for possession but to actively search kids? It’s like a police state.

Well we don't know if the little pissant OP tested was an athlete, got busted earlier, or is in a school with high amounts of drug use. It's probably like how some schools have metal detectors.

A lot of high schools only do this for sports. That way they know no one can be accusing of cheating. Some people are so desperate for scholarships in sports, they will try anything to do as best as humanly possible. Which ruins someone else's chances. How is making sure that doesn't happen, infringing their freedoms? It's illegal to do any drugs or even smoke unless you're 18 so how is this even a debate?! If it didn't happen they wouldn't have to.

If you think drug testing at schools is an apt comparison to a police state, you're really going to have a bad time once you actually get in a real police state...

Our "Freedom(s)" are slowly but surely being taken away one by one...sad...

I see your point #32, and were they testing only for fitness enhancing drugs, I would understand that. However they also test for PCP, marijuana and opioids which are not usually used to boost your performance seeing that they can produce loss of coordination, mental confusion, breathing difficulties, etc. Stealing is illegal too. Would it be ok to randomly search people's bags to see if they have any stolen items in them? I’m French and we don’t do drug testing in my country. I just find this policy pretty controlling and a paradox considering how attached Americans are to their civil liberties.

I've read over the years that they can't test normal students randomly. But they can test as a condition of an extracurricular activity. So sports, band, AV club, Young Republicans, etc.

#65 In America, to partocipate in a school sport, they HAVE to agree to a form saying that that they agree to random drug tests for any drug. It's a policy, but is only for those who've signed a form agreeing to it.

"Performance enhancing" can mean a lot of things. Smoking a bowl to relax you before a run on a snowboard/ski hill can enhance your performance.

...That actually happens in schools? Oh my. Can't really blame the kids for not appreciating being controlled in such a way.

You seriously think a little drug testing is control? Things could be much, much worse...

"A little drug testing" seems like a pretty big deal to me, I would not want any kid I know to be in a school like that. But I understand from the comments that this is relatively common in some countries, so I guess this is a cultural difference, I've genuinely never heard of drug testing happening in schools where I'm from (or at work, for that matter, another thing that apparently happens in the US!) While it's perfectly understandable to me that coming to school high is not acceptable, and dealing drugs at school should be sanctioned, I don't see why it would be a school's business to control what kids do in their free time.