Miscellaneous: Roasted

Roasted

By Whitley - 04/11/2010 15:17 - United States

Today, I made salmon patties and boiled cabbage. I smelled smoke from my stove burner, but thought I spilled something in the burner. No big deal. Later, this horrible smell started coming from the stove. My husband took the stove apart, only to find that I had fried a mouse as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 489

You deserved it 4 078

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Same thing different taste

By 12693 - 24/10/2012 17:35 - Australia - Perth

Today, there was a horrible smell in my kitchen. I tried to find the source, but failed and had to leave for the day. That night, my brother informed me that the smell was coming from a dead mouse stuck in our toaster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 568

You deserved it 2 105

Poor Despereaux

By Squeak - 06/02/2017 08:00 - United States - Fort Bragg

Today, I baked a cake. After feeding it to my entire family, I opened the stove, planning to temporarily store the cake inside. I then noticed a mouse, burnt to a crisp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 506

You deserved it 784

By hantavirus - 26/08/2009 08:44 - United States

Today, I found out that the horrific smell coming from somewhere in my kitchen was a rotting dead mouse in my dishwasher. I have been eating off plates washed in dead-mouse water for the past week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 905

You deserved it 11 387

Community cat squad

By Anonymous - 21/03/2022 02:00

Today, I found out that I have mice because my landlady got rid of the community cats that were keeping them outside, and apparently my cats aren't taking care of them. I found out when I turned on my oven and my apartment was filled with an awful smell that turned out to be burning mouse crap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 906

You deserved it 90

Oh nose!

By Fried. - 14/05/2019 16:00

Today, I woke up to the smell of cooking bacon. As I walked down my stairs towards my kitchen, I realised that the smell wasn't coming from bacon, but from my kitchen being on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 972

You deserved it 133

Melting

By Smoke Undetected - 13/10/2022 17:00 - United States

Today, I found out that our smoke detector doesn't work when my roommate turned on the wrong burner while trying to cook. Our air fryer was on said burner, and it started to melt. It sat there for who knows how long until I noticed smoke everywhere and went to investigate. We don't have an air fryer now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 791

You deserved it 156

By chinesef000d - 29/08/2009 05:38 - United States

Today, I was sleeping in my apartment when I woke up to the smell of smoke. Alarmed, I ran out to the kitchen to find my roommates trying to put out a fire on the stove. As soon as they saw me, they ran for it, informing me that it was my problem now. They used my good frying pan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 952

You deserved it 3 196

By cnkk07 - 14/10/2011 10:36 - United States

Today, my dad used the stove to boil water. Unfortunately, he turned the wrong burner on, setting the smoke alarm off. What's worse was the smell of burning plastic that came from the coffeemaker being melted down. It's been over an hour, and my eyes still burn like hell when I walk into the kitchen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 559

You deserved it 2 518

By Ewwwwww - 04/02/2010 18:53 - United States

Today, I discovered that the rancid stench in my bathroom was a decaying carcass of a mouse in my toilet tank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 727

You deserved it 3 348

Gordon Ramsey called, you're an idiot sandwich

By Anonymous - 30/04/2020 23:00

Today, I tried to make breakfast. I had everything cooking on the stove when I reached to turn on the faucet, only to find out that the head of the faucet was up the sleeve of my robe. After drying off, I went to serve my boyfriend his plate, but when I returned, the stove had caught fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 409

You deserved it 546

Miss_Represented 0

Thursday 4 November 2010 19:03

salmon patties and boiled cabbage... That was you're first mistake...

DocBastard 38

Thursday 4 November 2010 19:47

You fried a mouse? That's disgusting! What the hell is wrong with you, you ******* sicko??! You should have sauteed it in lemon butter with some shallots and garlic. Dumbass.

Comments

perdix 29

Thursday 4 November 2010 20:07

With your knowledge of cooking, horrible smells from your kitchen are inevitable. You didn't FRY the mouse, you roasted it.

rebeluke 1

Friday 5 November 2010 0:35

Perdix, I'm disappointed. Your comments used to always be occasionally mean, but always funny. Lately its been more flat out insults and less drawn out jokes. This one wasn't too bad, but just in general

perdix 29

Friday 5 November 2010 1:18

I'm all over the place. I like my Ikea comment from yesterday and my McDonald's one today, for example.

rubina 0

Friday 5 November 2010 3:47

and you don't fry your brain cells when you use drugs. it's a figure of speech you lumbering lummox, try harder the next time you want to try your hand at insulting someone.

fuckaduck1 4

Thursday 4 November 2010 20:08

FYourHusbandsLife for having a wife who can't cook a palatable meal, and tries to pass off fried mouse as an alternative...

cdatribe23 0

Thursday 4 November 2010 21:14

agreed.

Emmanem 0

Thursday 4 November 2010 20:12

Who the hell eats salmon patties and boiled cabbage? Ewww nasty shit.

demarcusT 0

Thursday 4 November 2010 20:23

the men did the physical work while the women cooked.. hmm

nocanhaz 4

Thursday 4 November 2010 20:24

OM NOM NOM

Trollkilla 0

Thursday 4 November 2010 20:31

two birds with one stone?

notsoluckypup 12

Thursday 4 November 2010 20:34

44, agreed xP

satomi_ishida 0

Thursday 4 November 2010 20:46

Love how the fml app crashes and at times doesn't show my comment D: OP your stove is probably from the deep, deep south, has a mind of its own, and thought you might like a side of mouse with it? Though f the mousey's life indeed.