Family, Religion and Miscellaneous: Reminder

Reminder

By Sigh - 13/09/2009 12:42 - Australia

Today, I went to visit my parents. Dad went on a religious tirade, and Mum got sick of him and pelted a Brazil nut at his head. Dad then lost his shit, and told Mum to go to her room and pray. I now remember why I moved out of home in the first place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 718

You deserved it 3 504

Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
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Same thing different taste

Modern Family

By Anonymous - 03/11/2020 23:01 - Australia

Today, my stupid drunk dad was yelling for food and since my mum needed to finish her taxes before midnight, I told him to STFU and passed him prawn fried rice, which he told me to shove up my ass. I threw it in the bin, since he's the only meat eater in the family. When she'd finished, she yelled at me instead of him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 021

You deserved it 241

By Anonymous - 10/05/2013 19:28 - United States - Warren

Today, my mother and I got into an argument, and she told me to go to my room. I refused, prompting her to slap the shit out of me. I'm 29, and she was visiting me at my own house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 656

You deserved it 6 452

By Anonymous - 21/07/2014 22:14 - United States - Bronx

Today, I visited my dad. He gave the, "You live under my roof, you follow my rules" lecture since I didn't do my "chores". I moved out 3 years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 520

You deserved it 3 626

By sonofaneuroticwench - 20/08/2014 20:08 - United States - Rice Lake

Today, my dad and I got into an argument, and he ended up calling me a son of a bitch. My mom heard and started arguing with him over him calling her a bitch. Three hours later, I'm now staying at my gran's house with my mom and hoping her threats of a divorce weren't for real. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 651

You deserved it 3 387

Mum

By mummer11 - 15/11/2013 17:49 - Ireland

Today, my mum staggered home, piss drunk. When I tried to walk her to her room, she shoved me away and cursed at me for being a "goody two-shoes". She then slurred, "I fucked your mum", and informed me that my mum is a skank. That's good to know, mum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 019

You deserved it 3 128

Thanks dad

By Anonymous - 19/09/2013 17:32 - Canada - Brantford

Today, I took my girlfriend home to meet my parents. My dad was having a bad day and was rude from the outset, but things went to total hell when he started screaming that he'd "kill" our microwave if it didn't "shut the hell up". My girlfriend now thinks we're a family of abusive psychos. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 874

You deserved it 3 323

By Anonymous - 23/05/2012 11:44 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I had dinner with my family for the first time in a couple of days. My mum and dad spent the majority of the time arguing whether salt or pepper weighed more. This is why I'm not home often. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 804

You deserved it 2 235

By fuckbucket14 - 14/04/2012 22:56 - Egypt - Hurghada

Today, I got into an argument with my dad in his hotel room. I lost my temper and stormed out onto the balcony for some fresh air, at which point he decided to lock the door behind me, trapping me there for half an hour while he watched TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 925

You deserved it 12 132

Fun for all the family

By Anonymous - 14/04/2021 02:00

Today, my mom and dad got into a fight, during which my dad said to my mom that her health conditions were of her own doing. Because of that, I got pissed and had a fight with my dad, taking my mom's side. Turns out, my mom took his side and ratted me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 761

You deserved it 267

Don't go

By Paulshaun1 - 06/10/2016 13:38 - United Kingdom - Luton

Today, my mother told me she thinks it is time for me to move into my own place. I agreed with her and went to look at studios/flats online. She later came into my room, saw me looking at places and then got pissed off at me, saying that I hate her for wanting to leave her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 260

You deserved it 692

netbeui435 3

Sunday 13 September 2009 20:20

the holier than thou ones are the worst.

evangldbrg 0

Sunday 13 September 2009 20:10

My family was pretty much the same, but with my mom and dad roles switched with yours. FYL, and be lucky you're out of the house...unfortunately I'm not, but should only be a few months before I am

Comments

MadeOfAwesome 1

Sunday 13 September 2009 20:44

"Lost his shit"? God, you make it sound like your dad crapped himself.

judgeymcjudge 0

Sunday 13 September 2009 21:40

Have you seriously never heard that expression before, or are you just nitpicking?

SonOfAMitch 14

Tuesday 17 July 2012 5:35

Don't say that #35, he might also think that OP's dad picks nits as well!

chellinha93 0

Sunday 13 September 2009 20:44

wowwwwww crazy family...

deegirl 0

Sunday 13 September 2009 20:44

So you're parents bicker, big deal. Your stupid.

Not_Yet_Rated 0

Sunday 13 September 2009 23:23

it's your not you're... your parents bicker is correct you are = you're Ex: you're a dip shit ^_^'

kawa_fml 0

Sunday 13 September 2009 20:45

no offense, someguy945, but the Brazil Nut thing was hilarious. OP, your mom is awesome. I bet she plays board games or some shit when she gets sent to her room. Stick it to the man!

someguy945 0

Sunday 13 September 2009 20:50

Oh wow I missed that. She threw a nut? That is unbelievable and totally off the wall. I take back everything I said. This is the best FML of all time.

maggiewalters 17

Sunday 13 September 2009 20:57

yeah that must have hurt. brazil nuts are kinda huge..!! and delicious!

Shmeagle 0

Thursday 27 January 2011 5:12

Was the nut okay?

waterynuggets 0

Sunday 13 September 2009 20:50

So your mom popped a nut on his head? My, how the tables have turned!

XRiseToFallAgain 0

Sunday 13 September 2009 21:01

*prepares machine gun for anti-christian comment* Let's go, betch

melifebeaverage 0

Sunday 13 September 2009 21:03

I'm atheist.

Intoxicunt 5

Sunday 13 September 2009 21:40

Because shooting people is a good Christian thing to do....

Intoxicunt 5

Sunday 13 September 2009 21:50

*Gets in tank* I'm in a tank, motherfuckers! :)

no0000ob 0

Sunday 13 September 2009 22:50

go suck sum cum u cant

Intoxicunt 5

Sunday 13 September 2009 22:56

That was an intelligent comment. Did you think it up all on your own?

SolarSchooner 2

Sunday 13 September 2009 22:58

Why does 'Suck sum cum' sound like a Thai dish?

Intoxicunt 5

Sunday 13 September 2009 23:03

Haha. You're right. That's one dish I'd like to avoid, though.

triplethreat13 0

Sunday 13 September 2009 21:04

I hate when things like that happen, like you want to try something that you don't do anymore (like visit parents) and you soon realize why you stopped doing it in the first place.