Today, I found out that my best friend lost her virginity to my father. Her excuse? She was drunk. His excuse? "She's hot." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I found out that my father, who very recently lost his wife, decided that drunkenly hitting on my long-time boyfriend's mom was a good idea. FML
Today, my dad told me he had been seeing someone for a while and has decided to marry her. When I met her, her son looked familiar. I lost my virginity to him. FML
Today, I was asking my best friend to tell me all the boys she’d had sex with, because I thought she had slept with my boyfriend. She accidentally said my dad. FML
Today, I found out that whenever my best friend used to say she wanted to do my dad, she wasn't kidding. She accomplished her mission in my bed after school. FML
Today, my best friend informed me that he had lost his virginity to my sister, which I already knew. However, he told me the location. My room. While I was asleep. FML
Today, my dad came home drunk and called me hot. FML
Today, I caught my 20 year old daughter having sex with my best friend's husband. Apparently it's my fault for coming home early. FML
Today, I found out that my father asked my best friend to marry him. He's 38 and we're 18. She said yes. FML
Today, I got drunk at a party at our house. At the end, my husband passed out, so his best friend and I carried him to bed. His best friend is stupidly hot and I get horny when I'm drunk, so on a whim I made a pass at him. He shut me down and later told my husband. FML
Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of two years. I got a call from my best friend telling me he had slept with her before we went out drinking the night before. FML
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Top comments
turtlemansam 6
She's not your best friend. she's your mom
cutieepie101 0
omigod. D: so sorry op
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Comments (183)
SwiftKick2DA 0
like I always say Jackie D makes us do some crazy shit! but wasting the V card on some old dude?! that's just trashy... trailer park even!
hollyL 0
ya wow, thats crazy.
iluvmtrench 0
haul his ass to jail ! how olds yourfriend ?!
mrsfunke 0
how old is she?! complete no no on both their parts. I'd be livid! fyl...
Gummybears4life 0
Gross!!!
SettoFail 9
lmao :)
SCrid2000 0
How is that an FML? You're not the one who slept with your dad, she is... Right?
tygerarmy 35
Drunk is not an excuse. That's messed up. Though as long as she's not underage good job dad.
tbe99 2
I don't understand how you can say "that's messed up" and "good job dad" about the same scenario... unless you are encouraging the dad to be a total creeper.
AddyMilla 0
i dont think i could contine being friends with that person lol
elmorous 0
-911, what's your emergency? -My Dad ... sob ... he just stole my ... my bestfriend's virginity ... sob -OK, I'm transferring your call ... next time call 1-800-96-JERRY and tell THEM about it
muffinlizzie 7
Well played