Today, my husband and I caught our 12-year-old son "experimenting" with a 5-foot tall stuffed Mickey Mouse. He even made sure to rip Mickey's pants off. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I walked in on my 14-year-old son apparently practicing his oral sex skills on the crotch of one of his sister's Barbie dolls. FML
Today, I walked in on my teenage son passionately making out with one of his sister's Barbie dolls. FML
Today, my five year old son decided to move all my stuffed animals I have around the house, into sex positions and massive orgies. What have I been teaching my son lately? FML
Today, my 2-year-old told me he found a new finger puppet. It was a used condom. FML
Today, I took my family to Disneyland. My husband had more fun than my five year-old daughter. He was hitting on the princesses. FML
Today, I found my favorite stuffed animal I had as a child in the trash bin. I took it out to find that it felt wet and smelt funny. Apparently, my younger brother cut a hole in the butt of it and used it to masturbate. FML
Today, I found my 5-year-old son prancing around in high heels and cat ears, wearing a thong as a necklace, and waving a riding crop around like a sword. He'd found the box where granny keeps her special outfits that make granddad extra happy on Friday nights. FML
Today, while we had my husband's boss over, my 3-year-old son decided to burst into the living room naked and yell, "Mum, look! Penis!" and wiggle it around. FML
Today, while on a family Disney World vacation, I saw a kid shitting on a public bathroom floor. It was my kid. He's 10. FML
Today, I had mice in the house and had to kill them with mousetraps. I pulled a trap out with a dead mouse and my four year-old son saw. Mice are his favorite animals, and now he won’t speak to me. FML
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Top comments
loserman67 36
So he slipped Mickey his "Minnie"?
mattzawesome 28
I don't think I can look at Mickey Mouse the same way anymore...
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Comments (101)
buckdharma 38
Well, Micky does have a high pitched female voice, wears short shorts, and has a cute tail. He's a mousetrap, I tell ya.
buckdharma 38
* M-I-C... K-E-Y... *
greencurtains74 11
Leave him alone. At least he isn't getting in risky situations outside of the home
phantomofmind 14
Where's the blow up dolls when you need 'em?
MaT30123 19
Their is other kids who hump actual girls, who gives a shit?
MaT30123 19
Are* and yes I mean 12 year olds. I'm 28 now, almost 29, but it happened a few times when I was that age. Really, you'd be surprised that it's not uncommon.
NickACD 27
Hey thanks, every time I see or hear things like this, I think about suicide.
EarlFug 19
Oh Mickey you're so fine, you're so fine you blow mind.. Hey Mickey! Seriously, FYL but your kid will be fine.
sandman19 11
When you love Disney a little to much
Witchylady 18
That is scary and so disturbing.
thecowgoesmo_o 2
12 year old? sounds about right. and for those who keep saying time for the talk, my parents never gave me the talk (that I remember) and I went through the stage with no trouble. just gotta go with the flow. I turned out perfectly fine btw
chucksfriday 21
Now you have an easy reference point during the sex talk at leastv