By omg - 25/03/2011 00:43 - Canada

Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML
I agree, your life sucks 55 607
You deserved it 8 703

Same thing different taste

Top comments


his learning the ways of the world whilst his young. I wish someone taught me, I was my pimps bottom bitch for 5 years before I had the courage to leave. I now work for myself and have never been happier.

sammy92 0

haha everytime I read your posts I automaticly read them with Peters voice and it just makes them 10 x more funny!

FMLoverAgain 7

Not a pimp. He will be a gigolo!

damn. pretty soon hes gonna start charging to let them suck on it. what have you been teaching the kid?

LMAOO this kid is hilarious, very entrepreneurial I see a bright future for this kid LOL

send him to church, he might bankrupt the priest

$10 says he gets someone pregnant at 10.

jonan1212 5

BE WORRIED... the might run out of quartes

ryanliechty 0

lmao tjinking exact same thing

Skylarboyle 0

you deseve it for not being a good mommy and making him charge a dollar I mean dam what are we teaching our youth these days!!!

bowchickawowbone 0

The girls might have only payed him because they thought it was a piece of string?

Well ge acts the part, now you have to start buying him the clothes

skyeyez9 24

He'd be a millionaire within 3 months!

mtacker 3

gator wants his gat punk ass bitch! XD

Hmmm_ok 0

technically he's a ho... lol.. nice try lil man

jokerzwild 0

gator dont play that shit teacher pays a dollar

future *****, actually. one of those girls will eventually wise up and pimp-slap him if he doesn't give her a cut.

You're an idiot...are you really calling out an 8 y/o kid because he has a small penis?? That kid's doin more with what he's been given than you ever will. Pimpin from the womb!! This kid's dooope

tjisnumbaone 5

true...Hahahaha love this one

you_freak 7

He's keeping his pimp hand strong!!

this kid should be the future president of the united states ... entrepreneurship at it's finest! and if he's not into politics at Least the next Ron Jeremy . either way , this kid is GOING PLACES

that kid is going places... mainly street corners... hey, male prostitution is a constant growing market... the kid could make serious cash out of it, and he obviously has the basics down.

15 hotter than ******* helllll holy shit!!!!!!!!!!

JacksonCampbell 9

an who are you to be telling anybody they are a bad parent?!?!?!?! you aint nobody so why don't you just shut your hole!!!!!!

sarahgrace4 0

damn He's already pimpin those girl watch out

Alpha35 4


impatientsnake 4

that kid will be an antruprenear damn

zourwolfe 0

entrepreneur* please at least use spell check

I don't think you understand. This is a win-win, size issues or not. Apparently he has been versed in the "f*** hoes, get money" way of life.

A pimp would charge people to touch someone else. He is either a future **** star or stripper.

violetrider123 3
Madmattmania 0

I wish my son were to be like him

Madmattmania 0

I wish my son were to be like him

SmallyBigs 9

So THAT'S where my daughter's quarters keep going..

22cute 17
CatEyes66 0

Wow, this FML is so wrong but sooooo so so funny. ^^ Yup, this kid is smart.

he's not smart, he's sexually exploiting women already!! hope u get ur kid help before he ends up in jail

austo97 0

ehem. Maybe you should read the post before you say things like that. He isnt doing anything to the girls. they are paying him to touch his pickle. full of win.

ya seriously its not the guys fault like every time I do anything with a girl thats a *couple years younger than me people are like "why would u exploit her like that?!?" well she a ho *couple can mean up to 7 years** **I'm almost sixteen

you've done crap with 8 year olds?! you sick bastard!

angel2293 0

datz my son!!!! haha jk im only 15

no 7yrs and up. but that's still very wrong

rldostie 19

Not genius. The kid was probably sexually abused by someone and he's acting out what he learned from the abuse. Almost always the case when it's this young. It's actually very sad. The op should have the police look in to the matter for the child's safety.

113 think before you speak such harsh threats

Temi25 6

I think he means he has did stuff with 9 year olds

200 there are threats. this i a reality check! are so naive to think that what this boy is doing isn't serious. clear the fog and stop pretending this doesn't exist. if this mum doesn't get her boy help, he will end up in jail for some monstrous atrocity! he's only 8 and he already has a perverted view on sexuality! if can't see that you are but a dimwit!

kingjames2306 0

so your 15 and you would mess with a 8 yr old thats falls into your (few 7yrs age difference?

UnearthlyEnemy 9

Sex sells, someone'a gotta pay the bills! So come and get your kicks.

beasting 0

Idiot doesn't even know how to spell or what s/he's talking about and yet she seems to call others a "dimwit". S/he also needs to learn how to start a damn sentence, not being a grammar Nazi but when people start a sentence with "are so naive" you have to point out the elementary school drop out.

enonymous 8

So did the teacher get a discount?

JocelynKaulitz 28

he's practicing his future career

future male stripper at bachelorette parties?

Flutist 3

I have to say that is the coolest little kid in the world. Getting girls to pay to touch his wee-wee... sounds like he learned what girls did all along, its special as long as people want to pay to get in/on.

i think that this is funny coming from someone whose screen name is "flutist." hehehe. ;) |the kid|

collinp89 1

fyl?! you should be on telling this story as a good one so people can see that there is one decent american! your son is a legend, you have clearly trained him well.

hatepineapple 14

The question is how much did the kid make? Over 3 bucks? Give him detention. 15+ bucks? Give him a shot of vodka the kid be a man now!