Sex and Intimacy: Hummmmm

Hummmmm

By Anonymous - 28/08/2013 16:11 - United States - Spokane

Today, I went down on my boyfriend, and tried out a new trick I learned. I read in a magazine that if you hum while giving oral, it's supposed to feel good. My boyfriend started laughing and told me to stop after 30 seconds because I reminded him of his singing toothbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 060

You deserved it 10 514

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Same thing different taste

Comedy gold

By Landdownunder - 05/10/2019 06:00 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me and decided it'd be funny to blow raspberries in my crotch. He literally thought it was the funniest thing ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 788

You deserved it 325

Acting is hard work

By S. Dub - 10/04/2020 05:00

Today, my boyfriend told me that I needed to moan louder so that he knew I was enjoying it. Reluctantly, I put a little 'umph' into my moans during the next round. He pulled out and said, "It's just awkward now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 921

You deserved it 300

Close but no BJ

By nikkrissa_04 - 07/08/2009 11:17 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were messing around in his car. I then decided I was going to give him a blowjob for the first time. As I was going down, he grabbed my chin and said, "Don't do that, your mouth isn't clean enough." FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 657

You deserved it 12 195

By merpaderp14 - 09/09/2013 06:15 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend found out it makes a funny fart sound when he blows hard into my mouth in the middle of making out. I can't get him to stop doing it every time we kiss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 104

You deserved it 5 960

Ouch

By Anonymous - 14/12/2011 23:12 - United States

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job. I thought it was going great and I was doing a good job, until he told me to "stop chomping on it like it's a hot dog." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 643

You deserved it 29 340

By disney_dick - 08/01/2018 00:00 - United States - Mims

Today, my boyfriend asked me to try humming during a blow job. He seemed to like it at first, but apparently, "I'll Make a Man Out of You" from Mulan wasn't a good choice. He still isn't speaking to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 960

You deserved it 2 030

Fond memories

By -_- - 13/08/2011 00:05 - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend for the first time. I went down on him, only for him to burst into tears halfway through. Apparently, I do it just like his long-lost teen sweetheart did. I swear I could feel him go completely limp in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 808

You deserved it 4 626

Nomnom

By wow babe - 19/11/2012 17:46 - United States - Arnold

Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. He definitely killed the mood when, while down there, he started saying, "Nomnomnomnom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 074

You deserved it 5 616

Bernie

By Anonymous - 27/11/2017 06:00

Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. It would have been great, if a mate of his didn't tell him to put Listerine strips in his mouth first "for the tingle." I've been running cold water over my burning genitals for 15 minutes while he laughs at the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 946

You deserved it 614

Honky

By Anonymous - 05/08/2015 14:06 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I let out a moan that can only really be described as sounding like a clown car horn. He ended up laughing so hard that he couldn't continue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 024

You deserved it 5 032

flashback.miss 28

Wednesday 28 August 2013 22:33

sweet of you to try something new to please your boyfriend, though.

Wizardo 33

Wednesday 28 August 2013 22:37

Maybe you should try one of those low, deep throaty hums, that should do the job properly and blow his brains away...

Comments

ohro 10

Wednesday 28 August 2013 22:52

That's an awful way to react. Keeps you from wanting to try new things. He should've appreciated it

HeyHeyFishFillet 34

Thursday 29 August 2013 1:35

It's not awful way to react. Maybe it's one that wasn't expected from OP but it's not her boyfriend screamed or shouted at her or pushed her away.

revolution4ever 14

Wednesday 28 August 2013 22:53

Make sure clean your mouth good! Your toothbrush is so good it even comes with self-dispensing toothpaste!

Ziggy122 15

Wednesday 28 August 2013 23:04

Lemme guess. You got that from Cosmo.

Enslaved 36

Wednesday 28 August 2013 23:05

The hummingbird? New trick--what about massaging that triangle spot under his balls while doing it? (It's not quite anal play so it won't freak out those insecure "I'm not gay" guys)!

jessBeAqueen 13

Wednesday 28 August 2013 23:33

I second this one

UnicornFarts 15

Thursday 29 August 2013 0:30

It is known as the taint.

LiterOfCola 16

Thursday 29 August 2013 1:13

Just cause you don't want your asshole touched doesn't mean you're insecure...

RedPillSucks 31

Thursday 29 August 2013 2:26

Your comment combines well with your profile picture

Freethaawave 19

Thursday 29 August 2013 4:28

Enslaved, you always have the realest comments though!

drshn 22

Thursday 12 September 2013 17:54

You know the trade girl. I bet you don't give your guy a chance to laugh

ksks1234 33

Wednesday 28 August 2013 23:05

Never listen to Cosmo.

Freethaawave 19

Thursday 29 August 2013 4:39

One time I read in cosmo it said to "spice" it up in the bedroom by spanking your man with a spatula.....

iAlissa 34

Thursday 29 August 2013 7:20

"This is for telling me to be in the kitchen constantly!" *whap* "Okay, now **** me."

NiteShayd 10

Wednesday 28 August 2013 23:07

Baby, baby, baby OOH!

gAt_d 26

Wednesday 28 August 2013 23:08

At least you tried, OP

worldclassrager 39

Wednesday 28 August 2013 23:12

Well maybe things will go on this...keep trying maybe it will grow on him...

Cristian89 29

Wednesday 28 August 2013 23:13

It's true. It definitely works if you do it right

sisco2901 20

Wednesday 28 August 2013 23:13

Guess his singing toothbrush won't suck his dick next time... On another note, I can confirm that advice works wonders, but maybe try it in a less conspicuous way - a 69 could take care of that.