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By
justlikeme79
| 9
Yow. I'm a girl, but that makes ME hurt.
By
ThatLooksSticky
| 16
Considering how small tootsie rolls are, that might not be something to brag about.
COMMENTS
By
superHydrate
| 4
aaah!! that blows!!
Reply
WCARlover
| 34
I don't get why people still try to do these puns...they are widely refuted by almost that whole FML community yet people still comment with stuff like this
Reply
Rei_Ayanami
| 18
I'm waiting for "that bites!" or some other terrible pun. I believe people do it because despite the public outcry of rage, they think the are clever and funny.
Reply
ShyAnn29
| 14
36, BRAVO! great job! *gives a standing ovation* (I think that's the right spelling and/or word)
Reply
biasedshooter
| 24
It was alot punnyer than your jokes, stfu and stop trolling
Ps. Grammar nazis i love you
Ps. Grammar nazis i love you
Reply
supertacowaffle
| 41
No, should be, *It bites*.
By
IndigoAcrylic
| 9
You're supposed to lick it like an icecream cone and suck it like a lollipop ^_^
Reply
baconstrips
| 12
I don't know about you but I go ape shit on an ice cream cone
Reply
IndigoAcrylic
| 9
As long as don't "chomp"...I'm sure thatt makes your partner verrryyy happy xD
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Jonkbaby
| 19
different strokes for different folks
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teague95
| 16
quick question who the hell sucks on a lollipop?
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teague95
| 16
Keevarou sorry your wrong Lil Wayne gave clear instructions to "lick it like a lollipop"
Reply
ShroomsOnAcid
| 16
Well I don't know about you all, but I bite my ice cream and crunch my lollipops.
Reply
teague95
| 16
Chill it was a JOKE man.
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FYLDeep
| 25
Who gives a shit what Lil Wanye thinks? Let him lick or suck whatever he wants.
Reply
teague95
| 16
I don't but it was the only relative joke
Reply
RussianFox
| 13
46- It was a joke, if you take that too seriously then that's a problem.
Reply
screamo_neve
| 12
He said he likes to answer seriously at times... So he knows it was a joke.
Reply
IndigoAcrylic
| 9
Calm your raging hormones, yall ;D
Reply
L0V34L1F3
| 9
No teeth on ice cream! That makes my teeth hurt. Sucking on lollipop is the best! Fastest way to finish the lollipop and no chance of hurting my tongue on the rough spots in the beginning.
Reply
Jovecove
| 13
Well fuck lil Wayne
Reply
ChilledDubstepa
| 6
I laughed at 53's comment.
Reply
umm_Talk
| 9
I think that's why old ladies give the best head. They have no teeth.
Reply
Brooke__Lynn
| 5
I've never used my teeth. I will swirl my tongue around while he's in my mouth and use my hand for what doesn't go in my mouth ;-)
Reply
maz255
| 10
139 well hello there, nice to meet you :D
By
WCARlover
| 34
No teeth! Whatever you do, don't go there
Reply
Rei_Ayanami
| 18
Some guys like that, I guess it's just an ask first thing. Another option is to just have them guide you verbally as to what the want at the moment.
Reply
Yodaevil
| 4
So is that brought up over diner? "So how do you want me to suck you later?" Best. Date. Ever.
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thebeautybleeds
| 17
Actually, my boyfriend likes it when I gently nibble.
Reply
RedPillSucks
| 31
guide verbally, as in
him: Oww, owww oowwww!!!! Don't do it like that!
her: what, honey?
him: less teeth, more tongue!
her: like this? *slurp*
him: less drool, fool!!!!
her: *bites harder*
him: oww! shit!!!!
him: Oww, owww oowwww!!!! Don't do it like that!
her: what, honey?
him: less teeth, more tongue!
her: like this? *slurp*
him: less drool, fool!!!!
her: *bites harder*
him: oww! shit!!!!
Reply
kaykay20
| 0
Less drool? If you even had a sucker in your mouth you'd now having something the mouth causes saliva to build up with only one place to go when not swallowing much, outside the mouth.
Reply
kaykay20
| 0
*know
By
justlikeme79
| 9
Yow. I'm a girl, but that makes ME hurt.
Reply
Jdimp
| 1
nom nom nom
Reply
TheNewGuy03
| 28
I don't always feel like I have to give tips (hehe!), but if I had one piece of sage advice to lend, it would be that sucking at blowing does more harm than good: the girl sucks longer, and (of course) the dude is in pain.
Interestingly enough, the best BJ I ever received came from a girl with braces. Apparently, she had no trouble wrapping her head around that concept...
|the kid|
Interestingly enough, the best BJ I ever received came from a girl with braces. Apparently, she had no trouble wrapping her head around that concept...
|the kid|
By
11up
| 14
blow jobs are God's gift to men
Reply
lovepotion75
| 4
That's like asking why did god give you life.. Just want to put it out there, it wasn't just ur mom and dad believe me.
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lovepotion75
| 4
Let's not forget, what ever you revive good or not.. Its from god. :)
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ShroomsOnAcid
| 16
No, blow jobs are women's gift to men. So...God = women?
Reply
lovepotion75
| 4
Who created eve?
Reply
teague95
| 16
"If this becomes a debate on religion we're turning off the comments" Your welcome Alan on the FML team said it for you (:
Reply
Beebow_fml
| 5
Isn't it sacreligious to have any type of sex purely for pleasure that involves the "spilling of the seed" or something like that? I think blowjobs are the French's gift to men.
Reply
bobbycorwen
| 5
Yes. God's gift to men was the free will to get blow jays.
Reply
docscientist
| 9
God's gift to man was to not exist. Shazzam.
Reply
iceblue_fml
| 0
Actually BJs happened atleast as far back as the roman times and also there are monkeys who do oral sex on eachother. So it may surpass humans alltogether.
Reply
bobbycorwen
| 5
I don't believe in gods either, but you need solid information to validate that claim.
Reply
skinflint
| 6
67: it is only sacrilegious if you are having sex with your dead brothers wife.
By
deviable
| 9
Hot dog are both disgusting and delicious. Ours is a complicated relationship.
By
hattypat
| 0
Ask him to demonstrate on a banana for you. ;)
Reply
ShroomsOnAcid
| 16
A banana's still not quite the same. I say we make it more realistic.
By
umm_Talk
| 9
I hate it when my junk gets chomped on too! :-P
Reply
Jonkbaby
| 19
serious question- what would motorboating feel like? lmao
Reply
TheChad85
| 1
Guys like some feedback too, help us help u. I'm just speaking for myself but I like to aim for Perfection, so it would behoove girls to provide us with a few words of advice and let us keep trying.
Reply
bombroot
| 9
Thanks for the mental image ...
By
KittyJay
| 2
kinda your fault... sorry. may i make a suggestion for practice? get a banana... spread peanut butter all over the banana.... add honey for lubrication if you want... your task is to get the peanut butter all off without breaking or putting teethmarks on the banana... you're welcome...
Reply
Miss_Trejo
| 5
Wow. I don't think I could spread peanut butter on a banana without ending with a terrible mush.
Reply
Lqum26
| 0
That's what she said
Reply
ShroomsOnAcid
| 16
Honey for lubrication? Honey doesn't exactly have the reputation of being wet and slippery.
Reply
OhLohd111
| 11
I kinda thought that continuing to give head until it's perfect would be practice enough so you know exactly what he likes... No?
Reply
teague95
| 16
!ATTENTION ALL LADIES LISTEN TO 52 SHE IS RIGHT!
Reply
TheChad85
| 1
Agreed ^^ guys don't typically mind helping u achieve Perfection
Reply
IndigoAcrylic
| 9
Iknowsomeguyswhoarebetterthanladiesatthis xD
Reply
G0v3nat0r
| 7
I wonder how many girls are actually going to try this
By
FoxRacerGirl7
| 7
Ha Ha Ha Ha oh my gosh!
Reply
brock329
| 3
Agreed