Work: Emergency

Emergency

By BigMouth McRedface - 14/05/2010 02:11 - United States

Today, I was rushing to leave work and get home because I really had to use the bathroom. My phone rang and I thought it was my husband, so I answered by saying, "I really have to poop." Yep, not my husband. It was one of my employees, who has the same name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 817

You deserved it 33 943

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Same thing different taste

By number2 - 18/10/2011 01:14 - United States

Today, while sitting on the toilet, my phone pocket dialed my boss's cell. He was in the next stall. He answered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 419

You deserved it 4 013

By Lukey1028 - 14/07/2015 01:07 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my co-worker handed me the phone and said it was my boyfriend calling, so I answered "Hello, Love!" It was my boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 337

You deserved it 3 444

By yolo is for shitheads - 09/10/2012 16:07 - United States

Today, I had to call in sick to work because I was experiencing bowel distress. I called my manager's phone directly so no one else would know of my embarrassment. She put me on speakerphone, and I only realized when the juvenile laughter started. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 434

You deserved it 2 164

By birdisnottheword - 11/03/2015 13:55 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, the phone rang while I was on the toilet. I asked my 3-year-old daughter to answer it, only for her to loudly say, "Mommy's on the toilet pooping." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 929

You deserved it 8 877

By Username - 18/02/2011 09:33

Today, at work, my phone rang. My intern answered it and told me it was a coworker who'd just left. I picked up and said "What's up bitch? What are you going to complain about now?!" It was actually my boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 018

You deserved it 44 915

By badwife - 07/11/2009 10:22 - Japan

Today, my husband left his phone at home. I looked through his contacts and found a person named "The Bitch." Being very curious, I called "The Bitch" to see who it was. My phone rang. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 378

You deserved it 17 355

By ShitHappens - 24/10/2011 05:04 - United States

Today, while on the phone with my boyfriend, I really needed to poop. Badly. He was in the middle of telling a story, so I figured I could get away with muting the phone while on the toilet. Halfway through, he suddenly went silent. I forgot to mute the phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 563

You deserved it 44 710

We heard you

By PeePee - 03/07/2009 19:19 - United States

Today, at work I had to use the bathroom. I asked my boss to watch my register and quickly walked into the bathroom. I squatted down and peed. A minute later I heard someone ask over our walkie talkie system who was using the bathroom. I had been pressing the intercom button while I peed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 018

You deserved it 13 395

Thanks dad…

By Anonymous - 26/09/2012 20:27 - United States - Fort Lauderdale

Today, I was on the toilet, when the girl I really like decided to call. I'd left my cellphone in my room and my dad answered. All he said was, "He's taking a shit. This might take a while." and hung up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 635

You deserved it 2 601

"Pooping and Shit"

By everybodypoops - 02/08/2017 20:00

Today, while at a rest stop, I heard a woman in the stall next to me answer her phone and say to the other person, "Oh nothing just pooping and shit." FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 875

You deserved it 532

FYLDeep 25

Friday 14 May 2010 9:24

Did your employee call you out on your bullshit excuse under the grounds that women don't poop?

YouGotTold 0

Friday 14 May 2010 9:24

ydi for having another guys name in in your phone and not having something to differentiate between the two... dc

Comments

reddwarf_fml 0

Friday 14 May 2010 15:11

cuppie. hope ur looks hold up cuz that's all u got sweetie

sexysue 0

Friday 14 May 2010 15:56

why cant u do your business then answer the phone later. I cant stand it that u cant miss a call -if u have to go potty, then go, u have caller ID so u can call them later!! even if it was your husband or whoever!! YDI for sure. Have some common sense!!!

nerdsgetmehot 22

Friday 14 May 2010 16:36

Why on earth would you feel a burning need to tell your husband that you "really have to poop"?

ohJeeznotme 7

Friday 14 May 2010 16:52

Why couldn't you just crap at work?

spychipmunk 0

Friday 14 May 2010 18:09

i agree too. i mean if your a guy you dont just picl up the phone amd say 'i really want to **********'. thats just something unnessecary to say, even if you are in an 'open marriage'.

tboudre 0

Friday 14 May 2010 18:51

I'm sure you husband wouldn't care to know about your bowel movements either. How about ignoring the call, followed by a text, "Busy, call you back in a minute"?

ivyshade 0

Friday 14 May 2010 23:38

why would you answer a call in such a way..ydi

Ucla_cupcake 0

Saturday 15 May 2010 4:20

OP maybe you should have  when you were at work. And put a last name on your contacts to distinguish between your husband and employee--if you haven't done so already.

priscilla_28 5

Saturday 15 May 2010 10:36

ewww that's just gross! That is no way to start a conversation or a very awkard one at that. Why on earth would you tell someone that? ugghh these people.