Ecstasy
Today, I was making love to my wife from behind. As we both reached climax at the same time, she threw her head back in ecstasy just as I buckled forward with pleasure. We slammed our heads together, effectively ending our orgasms. FML
Today, I was making love to my wife from behind. As we both reached climax at the same time, she threw her head back in ecstasy just as I buckled forward with pleasure. We slammed our heads together, effectively ending our orgasms. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was having the best sex with my husband, and right when I reached climax, he shouted "Abracadabra!" FML
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, when I lifted myself up a little bit. What I was not prepared for was my boyfriend leaning down to kiss my neck. We collided heads, hard. FML
Today, I went down on my girlfriend. In the midst of her orgasm, she grabbed my head with her legs, performing a submission most UFC fighters could be proud of, and she held on for so long that I almost suffocated. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. She had such an uncontrollable, aggressive orgasm that I'd be celebrating my efforts, if only in the process she hadn't knocked over my new expensive laptop, which then split in half. FML
Today, I made love to my girlfriend. I penetrated her for a while, then stopped to get my breath back... She carried on moaning even though I'd stopped moving. FML
Today, I was having sex with my wife, when she fell asleep. She then woke up and started moaning, clearly faking an orgasm. FML
Today, my wife fell asleep. I was giving her head at the time. Her snoring gave it away. FML
Today, after a long dry spell, I spent a day treating my wife, ending with a full body massage. She was wearing only panties, breathing heavily, and spread her legs, so I reached for her crotch to finger her… and she kicked me in the head so hard I fell off the bed and split my head open. FML
Today, my wife threw up in the middle of sex, then fell asleep right after. I didn't even finish and it'd been over a month since the last time. FML
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Top comments
andres19 0
that's why you wear protection
ahlun 0
doggy skill requires skill
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Comments (253)
yourlifeisbetter_fml 0
there are somethings you wouldn't even want to put on the Internet.... good sir, this is one of those things.
MissMaryContrary 3
Why not? He doesn't have a profile and posted it under a fake name. He has no idea who anyone here is and none of them know him. Half of them don't even believe this is real. Why not post it on the internet?
Sacredmaiden 0
ha ha ha. at least you had a good laugh after?
ManderPandaa12 0
You'd think if yer married you'd have some coordination with these kinds of things. Failure.
pilotdude7 0
hope that stops the freaking sex train of yours
marissabunge23 0
bahaha, that's a turn off!
clashcloud 3
such a lie! 90% of woman only cum w/ clitoral stimulation...I.E. she wasn't Cumming and was faking, or your lying!
Cinn_fml 23
You know there's another 10% you didn't account for, right? And they don't go into that much detail about what either of their hands is up to. Think before you speak, is that such a difficult concept?
ktdad07 0
His lying what? And since you don't disclose your (or is it you're) gender, I'll have to account for either one. I'm guessing you're a guy who's never given multiple orgasms, or a woman who's never had multiple orgasms.
MissMaryContrary 3
Also, you're statistics are off. According to the various studies collected and compiled in Human Sexuality Today (sixth edition) by Bruce M. King (a very interesting and educational book, btw) 40% - 50% of woman can achieve ****** without direct stimulation of the ********. More recent studies have found that the main organ to stimulate orgasms in women is actually the brain. Some lucky women can even think themselves into ****** without ANY physical stimulus. Studies done by Masters and Johnson, Helen Kaplan, and Ladas Whipple, and Perry have shown that it's possible that many women actually have 4 separate types of ****** depending on how they are stimulated. "Tenting" (clitoral stimulation), "A-frame" (vaginal stimulation), "blended" (stimulation of both the ******** and the ******), and Cervical or "massive" ****** (stimulation of the brain). And then there is, of course, the elusive "g-spot" ******, but most scientist now believe the theory of the g-spot to be disproved. 15%-25% of women surveyed have said they can achieve multiple orgasms during sex and only 5%-10% of women have reported never being able to ****** at all under any circumstances. Don't you feel educated?
joa76 3
They can disprove the existence of a g-spot all they want, but then how do you explain all the women who know for a fact there is one?
MissMaryContrary 3
*shrug* Placebo effect? Or something similar. Not that it really matters. As far as I'm concerned, whether it exists or not, if you feel that you have one and you get tremendous pleasure when your partner hits the right spot, who cares? You're having good sex. Not sure why anyone would try to disprove that but that's what the studies have said.
joa76 3
The problem I have with the placebo effect explanation is that there are people who hadn't heard what it's "supposed to" feel like, yet have had the exact experience described, only to read and realize that later. It might be false that there's a physical "spot" that can be felt, like some people say, but it seems probable that some women, at least, have an extra-sensitive area or something that accounts for that, particularly since it's described as feeling quite a bit different from a regular ******.
Cinn_fml 23
I remember reading somewhere that the sensitivity of the so called g-spot can be dependent upon the age of the woman. No idea how reliable that source is as I can't even remember where I read it, but it does seem possible on the basis that it does seem to be something that isn't constant woman to woman.
AdolfShitler 0
nothing turns girls on more then headbutting them in the skull...ps I'm joking
Shover 0
Bet he's proud of his new wife for telling everyone on the Internet she can obtain multiple orgasms... Classy
ktdad07 0
Considering he posted the FML about their sex life in the first place, I doubt he minds. Don't be bitter just because you've never been able to provide that for a woman.
MissMaryContrary 3
The fact of the matter is, the anonymity of the internet makes it so I have no inhibitions about saying anything. I have no idea who you people are and none of you have any idea who I am. You don't even know what I look like. I will never meet any of you and even if I did, I wouldn't know it and neither would they. There are absolutely no repercussions for speaking my mind wholly without any censoring. Besides, half of the people reading this assume I'm just trolling while another quarter think I'm just a liar. What difference does it make? We're in the "intimacy" section of "f*** my life" dot com and you're looking for class? Have you even READ most of the fmls in this section?
zyth 4
fake
paradox45 0
maybe you'll be able to have makeup sex?