Today, I had my girlfriend over and we were watching a movie in my basement. I ran upstairs and popped a bag of popcorn. Later I came downstairs to find my 10 year-old brother sitting next to my girlfriend, saying, "My brother always says he wants to screw your brains out, whatever that means." FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I finally got the girl of my dreams to come over for a movie. When I answered the door, my little brother ran up behind me, yelled, "Geronimo!" and pulled down my pants and underwear. FML
Today, my girlfriend came over to visit me and my brother at our apartment. I left for just five minutes to fix us lunch. When I got back, she was making out with my brother. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were making out while she was laying on me. Her little brother walked in, saw us and yelled, "Mom they're swallowing each other!" FML
Today, I was with my girlfriend, thinking we were alone in the house. Her little brother found us having sex on the couch, took a pic and said, "You are now both my slaves." He ran upstairs and locked his bedroom door. FML
Today, I went to the movies with my best friend. While waiting for it to start, I went on to describe this guy I really liked and how badly I wanted to do him. Just then the girl sitting behind us leans down and says "That's my little brother. So you're the creeper he talks about." FML
Today, my brother babysat for me. He invited his girlfriend around without me knowing, and they were all playing hide and seek together. While he and his girl were hiding, they decided to have a quickie. My three year old found them and saw everything. She won't stop copying their sex noises. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, when his sister knocked on the door and asked if she could borrow the zombie movie we were watching after we were done with it. We weren't watching a movie; I was just moaning. FML
Today, I was watching a movie in the basement with my boyfriend when we started to get a little frisky. My mom walks down with dirty laundry and tells him to stop it because I'm creaming all over my undies. She showed him a pair of dirty ones to prove it. FML
Today, I snuck into my brother's room to scare him. Just as I was about to go for it, his girlfriend calls. I had to sit there motionless listening to my brother having phone sex, then wait for him to go to sleep and sneak back out to pretend it never happened. FML
Today, my girlfriend got up in the middle of sex saying, "You're taking too long, I'm gonna go make some popcorn." I asked her if she could get me some. She said no. FML
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Top comments
meaganwas 0
You have the best little brother ever.
drybamboo 0
That ten year old knew what he was saying. LOL.
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Comments (121)
Remegy 3
#21 no, you have to understand that KIDS ARE LIKE DEMONS! they hear stuff and repeat it to get a BAD reaction, then adding the good ol' 'whatever that means' to make themselves seem innocent... honestly though, i would've done the same thing as the kid, assuming i was his age so i could get away with it, i love to pester my sibs like this :P
mattiscool 0
yeh your brother is amazing lmao. kick his ass. he knew what that meant, hes not that young and its YDI if you told him that u wanted to screw your girlfriends brains out. But you probably didnt tell him that
jng131 0
pervert.
raNDMGUy 5
lol did u actually say it to him?
lesb_lv 0
Ohh, little bastard... hes just 10 and already hitting on your gf
pinkfrenchrose 5
So how did it turn out? ;)
notfromearth7 0
I mean, I can see why this wouldn't be a serious FML, but the OP probably wanted to tell his girl that himself, not have his idiot little brother spill the beans.
Vehicle 1
Man, I know that little siblings can get quite annoying, But man it's disrespectful for you to say that behind your girlfriend's back- especially to someone who knows her! ...I feel sorry for you if he made it up but other than that...
silvermoonstar3 3
1. You shouldn't talk that way around children. You deserve that. and 2. This post shows up in the FML live feed twice in a row.
Tehalon 0
Ofc he knew what it ment, atleast I knew that I could do more with my peen then just writing yellow letters in the snow.