Today, I was having some kinky sex with my girlfriend. When I said "You've been a bad girl", she looked at me wide-eyed and asked very seriously, "What did I do?" FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Things got heated and I yelled, "Who's your daddy?" With a blank expression she replied, "I don't know." FML
Today, I was trying to get my boyfriend in the mood so I held his hands against the bed, and whispered, "Have you been a bad boy?" Thinking he'd say something kinky back, he replied "Yes Santa" then burst out laughing. FML
Today, I told my girlfriend that I love her. She panicked and blurted out our S&M safeword. FML
Today, I was having sex with someone I've been casually seeing. He got all weird during it, and said, "That's a good girl". Once he left, I told my housemates about it. Now every time I do something nice for them, they respond, "That's a good girl". FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. I thought I'd be spontaneous and spice things up, and gave her a spank across the butt. She started crying. FML
Today, I was doing it with my girlfriend. Trying to be sexy, I moaned her name. She replied, "What?" FML
Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML
Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, she suddenly said : "Are you going to be done any time soon?" FML
Today, I was making love to my fiancée, when she dug her nails into my back and told me to "choke" her like I did last night. I was at work last night. FML
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. It was just me and her. Things began to get heated, and we started doing it on the living room couch. Near the end of it, I whispered in her ear, "Who's your daddy?" I then heard behind me, "I am." FML
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Top comments
Wakachulak 22
Well, at least you know she hasn't done anything.
Alyxi 20
are you sure she wasn't just trying to play along?
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Comments (91)
DocBastard 38
The first rule of kinky sex: It's only kinky if both people are aware of it. Otherwise it's just mean.
asnakelovinbabe 16
This is one of the most under-appreciated comments on FML, ever. I lol'ed way too hard at this.
Food2Abs 13
True
jonnyboy89 10
hmmm when you ask for a bj does she actually blow air on you???
jcurry25 6
That is mildly adorable
mageepaigeee44 15
I thought so too. Her innocence is kind of cute. If I said that I feel like my boyfriend would melt.
ThatSlappinBass 32
Perhaps she was just trying to role play as someone very innocent? Or she just could be new to dirty talk itself. Either way, OP, I hope it all ended well.
Nish007 15
what did she do? O_O
Skyzeri 20
That's actually really cute.
EphMi 5
ask her, "who's your daddy?"
Wakachulak 22
It's even creepier when you know what movie it's from.
worldclassrager 39
Either she is hiding something or don't use that terminology
vikky538 28
may be she needs some training,.. trial before sex..
Neoking 4
You never know OP, maybe she's just REALLY good at playing along...