Today, my new doctor gave me a breast exam and said everything was healthy, before adding "Well, I think so, anyway. I don't actually work here." As I freaked out, he laughed out loud, said he was just kidding, and that he should prescribe me a chill pill. FML
Collection
College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, I went to have a breast exam. The doc told me that she would touch different parts of my breasts, and said to tell her if at any point it felt painful. As she was examining me, I was going to say that it wasn't painful, but instead I blurted out, "It feels good." FML
Today, I got a breast exam. I'd never had one before, but assumed it would be quick and easy. I had no idea how ticklish my boobs are. I burst out in uncontrollable laughter and kept instinctively jerking away. FML
Today, my doctor got my blood test results from the lab. He looked at me gravely and told me I had just weeks left to live. After I started hyperventilating and crying, he burst out laughing and said he was kidding. He then prescribed me some iron tablets and sent me on my way. FML
Today, I went to the doctor for a suspicious lump under my armpit, so he suggested a breast examination. While pressing all over them he said, "We're gonna have to send you for an X-ray because you have the most lumpy breasts I've ever felt in my life." FML
Today, I had to get a prostate exam. Right before the doctor started, he told me that if I found it awkward at all, I should just imagine I was being probed by aliens. FML
Today, my doctor died. Last week, after a check up I'd had because I was worried about a cough, he told me not to worry because I was as healthy as he was. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's office, where my mother happens to work. When my doctor tried to prank her by saying I have chlamydia, my mother laughed and said she didn't believe it, adding, "Have you even seen the way she interacts with boys?" FML
Today, while getting a breast exam for some suspicious lumps, I was lying on the table with my boobs exposed and I learned my doctor is afraid of wasps. I had to chase the wasp out whilst topless. FML
Today, I was at the gynecologist and he was performing a routine check-up. He was a new doctor and I was just slightly uncomfortable with him. About mid-check-up, as he felt around my uterus, he said in a cartoonish voice, "Oh, it's so squishy up here." The doctor turned me into a sock puppet. FML
Today, I was giving myself a breast exam for lumps. I heard laughing, looked around and saw that the 12 year-old neighbor and his friends were watching through the window. FML
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Top comments
Earths_Venus 25
Buy him a rectal thermometer because he's an asshole.
Earths_Venus 25
Can I buy you a ball gag so you'll shut up?
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Comments (113)
copperchinchilla 19
I think all of you guys need a doctor to examine you, you are all obviously lacking your funny bone
ThePols 11
Hahaha classic
LilFidget 4
That's an awesome doctor XD!
Ilikepie82479 20
I'm sorry, but that's hilarious
nateracecar5 6
Honestly, that's pretty funny. I don't see what the issue is here.
Here4theshow 17
I actually thought that was really funny. Hope you got a kick out of it later on OP! Haha
SEABASSr0130 11
XD I'd love to have him as my doctor
inowhtthefoxsays 20
Hopefully he was just your primary dr. It would really have been awkward if he was your gynecologist! Just saying.
homes7d 14
That's hilarious
Saraishi 25
Doctors love messing with patients, laugh it off OP.
f_mine_fer_sure 6
People don't go to doctors to be messed with. They go to doctors to be helped. I wouldn't laugh this off if I were the OP. People give doctors WAY too much leeway. Just because they went to medical school doesn't make them infallible and doesn't give them the right to treat the rest of us like playthings.
Saraishi 25
Who's treating who as a plaything? People are often very nervous when going to the doctor and doctors know it and try to make them at ease with a joke. Sometimes it's well received, sometimes it's not but i doubt it's malicious or sadistic as you seem to think. Personally i had alot of painful problems with my ears in my childhood, losing a bit of hearing in the process, and to this day a visit to an ENT makes me really nervous. Most of the docs pick on it and joke with me to make me comfortable and i appreciate it. One was an asshole who told me his 10 year old patients don't give him so much trouble and i had to put him in his place. Not all doctors are assholes and their medical degree certainly does not automatically make them above everyone else or excuse their behaviour - when it's abusive or unwelcome. OP didn't welcome the doctor's little banter but it didn't seem to be malicious either and what i meant was that OP shouldn't take it to heart. If it really bothers her, then she should adress it.