The Top

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The all-time greatest FMLs

NSFW FML

By Anonymous - 25/01/2023 10:30

Today, I signed in to my personal Google account on my work laptop. Unbeknownst to me, the browsing history and favourites from my personal computer synched, causing my kinky PornHub history to show up, all while I was screen-sharing to my boss and prospective clients. FML

I agree, your life sucks 403

You deserved it 1 810

Surprise, wanker!

By pussnboots - 16/07/2024 13:00 - United States

Today, as I was feeling frisky, I started to jack off. I was about to come when my cat attacked my hand and nether regions under the blanket. I really got the pussy, didn’t I? FML

I agree, your life sucks 403

You deserved it 250

Sex ed failure

By Anonymous - 01/02/2025 19:00

Today, in the heat of losing our virginity, I asked him to “suck my clit, suck my clit, oh god please suck my clit.” He stopped what he was doing and asked me, “What’s a clit?” I almost strangled him. Don’t date boys homeschooled by single mamas, they’ll break your heart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 403

You deserved it 292

The end of an era

By Anonymous - 19/04/2025 03:00 - Netherlands

Today, my grown-ass son is refusing to get out of bed because some anime shark girl he watches is quitting YouTube. FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 111

Vaguepost

By Anonymous - 01/09/2024 02:00 - United States

Today, I've always struggled with communication and such with my family, so I was difficult to take care of, yet I always held myself together, did my chores, and took care of myself. Sometimes I even helped them out, but now they’re kicking me out of the house, and I have nowhere to go, and I don’t know what to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 147

Dick move

By Anonymous - 07/10/2025 22:00

Today, my wife insisted on getting burgers at like 11:58, two minutes before the place closed, which was a dick move. As she’s placing her order, I clearly heard the guy in the back going, “For fuck's sake…” as he restarted the grill. I wouldn’t have blamed him if he spit in her fries, honestly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 91

Everyone's an expert

By Anonymous - 08/01/2026 03:00

Today, and for this past week, I've had multiple people tell me all I needed to do to cure my incredibly rare chronic illnesses was some essential oils. Putting those 'medications' aren’t going to do anything. They then proceeded to give me more advice on how to treat a kidney transplant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 62

Are they wrong?

By Anonymous - 19/02/2025 13:30 - India - Jamshedpur

Today, I slipped fell down an entire flight of stairs in front of literally everyone, and after getting back up, I tripped down another flight. Then, instead of silently walking away, I started laughing like a maniac and now everyone probably thinks I'm dumb, clumsy, and crazy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 184

Emotional support please

By sadrainindeed - 11/11/2023 03:00 - United States

Today, I cried myself to sleep. Last night too, and the night before that, and the nights before those. But I guess that’s what life is, huh? FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 135

Knock yourself out

By Anonymous - 09/08/2025 20:00 - United States

Today, my package with two brand new toys got delivered to the wrong apartment. Somewhere in this apartment complex, a stranger is either judging me or having the best day of their life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 101

Just Hanging On

By FML Approved - 20/10/2017 20:30

It'll get better. Eventually.

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 108

Don't follow your dreams, kids!

By Anonymous - 06/07/2025 20:00 - Belgium - Schelle

Today, after years of study and hard work, I fulfilled my long time dream of becoming a neurologist. Too bad it took me so long to figure out I absolutely hate working in a hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 137

Make it make sense

By Gary - 14/02/2025 23:00 - United Kingdom - Alton

Today, my 3 year-old was trying to learn some simple spelling. She then proceeded to have an absolute meltdown because I said my name doesn’t have an ‘N’ in it. My name is Gary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 124

Meandering

By Kate & Nate - 29/11/2023 14:00 - United States

Today, I tried a new recipe for dinner. However, the recipe was written by someone with a penchant for overly dramatic storytelling. I spent the entire evening deciphering the narrative while desperately trying to salvage a dish that ultimately tasted like disappointment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 221

David Tinfoil

By David - 25/05/2024 09:00 - Ireland - Cork

Today, as an amateur magician, I tried a new trick at my nephew’s birthday party. The trick involved pulling a fake rabbit out of a hat. I didn't realize my nephew had put his real pet rabbit in the hat as a prank. The poor rabbit jumped out, scaring the kids, and causing chaos. FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 130

I can fix him

By Anonymous - 05/10/2024 22:00 - South Africa - Cape Town

Today, I realised I'm like the Mary Poppins of dating. I keep meeting these broken men, I help them through their stuff, only for them to date someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 134

I've gotta lot going on, OK?

By Anonymous - 30/08/2025 02:00 - United States

Today, my house absolutely reeks of skunk after my dog got tagged at 10pm last night and we didn’t realize it until she was already back inside. This is on top of a nasty case of whole body poison ivy my 6 year-old is dealing with, and my wife’s appendix decided to leave the chat last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 401

You deserved it 84

Irritation

By Anonymous - 11/03/2025 09:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, I have family over and even though they can see I'm stepping away to go take a shower, instead of interacting with my child who they supposedly love, they ignore her to the point where she comes crying to the bathroom door. So now I gotta move quicker? FML

I agree, your life sucks 401

You deserved it 194

Madhouse

By Anonymous - 24/01/2024 09:00 - Germany

Today, I was trying to get some sewing done and learned that the absolute least efficient way of realizing a project with lots of moving parts is to have either a toddler or a fun-loving pet see what you’re doing and decide to “help” with this exciting venture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 401

You deserved it 159

My forever home

By Anonymous - 01/05/2025 12:00 - Czechia - Prague

Today, my father gave me the best birthday gift, a piece of real estate. I got a grave, which is leased. FML

I agree, your life sucks 401

You deserved it 68

Not great

By poopsquirt404 - 06/01/2026 00:00

Today, my friend and I flew home from India ten days early. I got cholera and she got groped twice and followed back to our accommodations by a gang of men. So much for our exotic overseas trip… FML

I agree, your life sucks 401

You deserved it 216

Lost in the sauce

By Kelgor - 07/08/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, I started to give a 30-minute presentation about environmental sustainability. When I'd finished what I though was a powerful introduction, I was informed that I was in the wrong conference room, speaking to a group of what appeared to basically be a bunch oil barons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 401

You deserved it 293

Hangry boy

By Anonymous - 17/01/2024 22:00 - Germany

Today, my mom’s greedy cat stole some milk I had left on the countertop, completely undeterred by the fact that not only was the milk in a plastic bag, it was also frozen solid. Yep, he actually managed to eat it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 401

You deserved it 145

Handle with care

By Frankly - 26/06/2024 16:00 - United States

Today, my dad and two of his hunting buddies started a true crime podcast. It's as bad as you can imagine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 401

You deserved it 122

Grouchy old hag

By Anonymous - 01/01/2025 21:00 - New Zealand - Lower Hutt

Today, I was ordering a new vape for my Grandma online, since she refuses to use the internet. When I told her that the type of vape she uses wasn't available anymore, she screamed, "WELL THEN, I'LL JUST GET A CARTON OF CIGARETTES, AND SMOKE THEM UNTIL I GET CANCER!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 401

You deserved it 93

Deviated septum blues

By Trent - 19/03/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, I had a nosebleed at work after having recent surgery. As I was walking to the bathroom, I tripped and fell, sending blood splattering everywhere. My manager, who was walking by, looked at me and said, “You’re really committed to the bit.” I was too embarrassed to respond. FML

I agree, your life sucks 401

You deserved it 69

Skin deep

By I h8 my skin - 11/09/2025 15:00

Today, for the sixth time, I made a girl feel cherished and appreciated, only for her to pick someone else. I have vitiligo all over my skin and face, so girls typically don't look at me twice, and the potential girls I would like to date only "see me as a friend" and pick men with normal skin. I give up on love. FML

I agree, your life sucks 401

You deserved it 89

Gushing

By NotCream - 04/10/2025 15:00

Today, I've been having persistent fungal infections and was getting treated by a male gynecologist. I had to go in to give vaginal swab tests. I washed and cleaned before I left, but when I got on the doctor's table I already had so much discharge. The doctor asked, "Is it the medicine?" I had to say no. FML

I agree, your life sucks 401

You deserved it 99

Spiders the size of trucks

By Anonymous - 06/11/2025 12:00

Today, I was about to leave for work when I sneezed over and over. I quickly checked the mirror to see if any mascara had smudged, only to see a big black spider crawling up my neck. No, this wasn’t a dream. Yes, this really did happen (I live in Australia). FML

I agree, your life sucks 401

You deserved it 89

Couponed off

By Uber scammed me - 12/05/2024 12:00 - Sweden - Haegersten

Today, I was going to an event with my friends and I'd told them I could pay for an Uber since I had a coupon for 70% off. It was only going to cost 5 bucks, but later I looked at my bank statement and an additional 15 bucks was taken from me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 401

You deserved it 113

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The Top

Today, I was reading a book in public. Some bastard stranger came over and started spoiling the plot for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 120

You deserved it 2 874

Today, I was eating Campbell's vegetable soup. Halfway through, I started to read the ingredients and found beef broth. I have been a vegetarian for seven years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 944

You deserved it 55 320

Today, my dad called, saying he was in town and that he wanted to see me. I was excited, thinking he wanted to come see my new apartment. Turns out he just wanted to borrow my Xbox. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 113

You deserved it 2 384

Today, I used a tanning bed at my local gym for the first time. I went in for the full allowed time of 9 minutes. I went to school after and everybody said I looked like Trump. Confused, I went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. My skin is orange and matches with my bleach blonde hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 740

You deserved it 3 989

Today, I regret ever deciding to ask out a younger man. I’m 27 and he’s 21. I’m worried about my career, he’s worried about his Xbox; I love my parents, he’s still rebelling against his like an emo teenager; I want romance, he likes to wobble my breasts while giggling, saying, “Boobies.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 484

You deserved it 1 966

Today, I met a new guy at work who wouldn't stop hitting on me. We ended up on a six-hour shift together watching a pool, so we were wearing nothing but bathing suits when he began grabbing me inappropriately. When I confided in my female coworker about it, she told me that he was her husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 284

You deserved it 218