When you run out of kibble... By FML Approved - 19/10/2017 20:30 Say it isn't so! I agree, your life sucks 429 You deserved it 101 Share Tweet Share
Today, I thought maybe I should go to my doctor because my hips crack every time I take a step. But she's also my recently ex-boyfriend's mom, so I have to choose between being in constant pain or having my doctor poke at my hips while asking me why I'm no longer dating her son. FML I agree, your life sucks 31 034 You deserved it 6 363
Okaeri! I hope you had a great week out in the cold (most of our southern hemisphere friends don't know what they're missing). Personally, since I discovered this website I couldn't have been better. This week we're welcoming an atypical artist sinc... I agree, your life sucks 0 You deserved it 0
Today, my boyfriend wanted to take me to a movie after days of not seeing me. This long-awaited date involved me paying for food and my movie ticket when he ran out of cash again. He then dumped me as we left the theater walking to his car. Yes, I financed my own breakup date. FML I agree, your life sucks 49 829 You deserved it 4 872
Today, I tried to go down the stairs two steps at a time. I slipped, fell flat on my ass, and busted my lower lip against my overbite. When I tried to get up, I realized I had also peed my pants. FML I agree, your life sucks 2 043 You deserved it 1 397
Today, I decided it was the perfect day to make Penne alla Vodka. It was also the perfect day to set my kitchen on fire. FML I agree, your life sucks 474 You deserved it 624
Today, I never wanted a wife, so of course I got married. I never wanted kids, so of course my unwanted wife insisted we have two. My mother-in-law, who I wish daily would get hit by a bus, just got hired at my workplace. My only pleasure in life is fishing and my kids just broke my only rod. FML I agree, your life sucks 730 You deserved it 4 350
Today, I was masturbating into a sock when I felt something on my cock. I quickly ripped the sock off and threw it on the floor… and watched a huge spider come scurrying out. I just inadvertently fucked a spider. FML I agree, your life sucks 57 469 You deserved it 106 809
Today, I was asked to stay at my parents' house for a week while my mom stays with my dying grandfather. Dad greeted me with a whole list of chores to do every day when I'm not at work, and won't even so much as let me use my laptop when I'm not busy. He does nothing but waste money on eBay all day and doesn't help. FML I agree, your life sucks 511 You deserved it 110
Did not expect that.