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The all-time greatest FMLs

My life is a movie

By Anonymous - 08/02/2025 12:00 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I was late for work and sprinted to catch the elevator. I made it just in time, only to realize I was in the elevator alone and had just dramatically dived into it for no reason. FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 319

You tried…

By Trapfail - 09/08/2021 04:01

Today, I claimed I was pregnant to get back at my ex and the girl he cheated on me with. I tagged him in my "ultrasound" pic, saying it was his baby, hoping she would dump him. Turns out there’s this thing called "reverse image search" and he posted the Google page where I got the ultrasound from. FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 7 866

The void

By Anonymous - 22/12/2024 12:00 - United States

Today, I was trying to flirt with someone in a small bar. I thought they'd smiled at me, so I smiled back. Turns out, they were smiling at their phone screen. I just awkwardly sat there, smiling into the void. FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 295

Policy of truth

By Searsguy - 19/06/2022 14:00

Today, I got fired on my second day on the job. I'd said that I was the former manager of a Sears that had permanently closed. Thinking they wouldn’t call and verify since it was closed, I put it on my resume. Turns out one of my coworkers used to work there for 10 years and said he never heard of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 2 865

The wrong sort of lock in

By Anonymous - 10/08/2021 09:59 - South Africa

Today, I gave my 10-month-old the house keys to keep her busy. I locked the burglar gate and left the door open. She can walk, and she threw the keys outside the gate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 1 380

Tasty!

By Andrew Williams - 12/01/2023 06:00

Today, on the kitchen counter, there was a plate that had snacks on it. I decided to take a bite. I spat it out. Later on, my mother told me it was dog food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 810

Good vibes

By Anonymous - 04/09/2024 16:00 - United States

Today, I was in a quiet library when I noticed a buzzing sound. I ignored it, but it kept going. I looked around, but nobody else seemed to notice. After 5 minutes of searching, I realized the buzzing was coming from my backpack. My electric toothbrush had turned itself on and was rattling around. Everyone watched me pull out a vibrating bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 384

To each their own

By Anonymous - 13/12/2024 07:00 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, my husband was eating me out when he suddenly lifted up my hips and started licking my asshole. I screamed for him to stop, since it was disgusting. I don't think I can ever have sex again. I can't believe I married someone who would do that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 1 002

Slippery slope

By Anonymous - 09/05/2024 07:00 - United States

Today, I got popcorn when getting groceries. I was excited to see popcorn butter spray on sale and decided to try it. Excited, I made some popcorn while I went to use the can. Butter sprayed like an aerosol can all over my desk and floor. Now, my apartment smells like a movie theater and there's butter EVERYWHERE! FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 418

Whiny Husky

By FML Videos - 18/11/2018 00:00

But moooooooom...

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 54

By Anonymous - 27/02/2010 12:17 - United States

Today, I found out I can sneak out of my house... but not back in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 213

You deserved it 341

Hang in there

By Anonymous - 07/04/2024 14:00 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I realized I’m so often high that being sober no longer feels "normal" to me. I don’t know any other way to cope with my emotions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 213

You deserved it 582

Chick magnet

By Anonymous - 23/02/2024 05:00 - United States

Today, my girlfriend left town for a month to visit family. Meanwhile, the young woman I hired at my restaurant just got back from vacation with her natural hair color restored. It’s the same color as my girlfriend’s hair, and she made a pass at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 213

You deserved it 493

McSteamy

By Anonymous - 07/11/2021 11:00

Today, I illicitly borrowed my dad's car to go to the store, but crashed into my mom's car as she and dad were returning from my grandma's house. Both cars are totalled, my mom is in hospital with a broken collarbone, and I realised dads really can make steam come out their ears if they’re really mad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 213

You deserved it 2 220

Nice try

By Well that didn't work - 08/04/2025 06:00 - United States - Edison

Today, on the advice of several friends, I tried to de-escalate a stupid argument with my fiancée by kissing her. She slapped me senseless and whooped my ass up and down the house until I escaped to the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 213

You deserved it 499

Brain worms

By Derp - 04/02/2023 23:00 - United States

Today, I was trying to scratch off an Xbox gift card. When I started, I heard knocking. I opened the door. No one was there. I went back to scratching the card. Knocking again. No one there. This repeated until the fifth time, when I realized it was my rocking the desk with the repetitive movement of my arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 213

You deserved it 886

Practice makes perfect

By Anonymous - 20/09/2023 05:00 - Ukraine

Today, I have a permanently injured right hand. Social media star Real86Hands has no hands. Guess which one of us has better penmanship? FML

I agree, your life sucks 213

You deserved it 496

Performative

By OliviaO - 24/12/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, I laughed so hard at a joke that I snorted, which caused me to choke on my Coke, which then caused me to fall off my chair. The joke wasn’t even that funny. FML

I agree, your life sucks 213

You deserved it 276

Unrequited

By Cannneverwinsmh - 30/09/2025 15:00

Today, I once again listened as the girl I've loved for the past three years ranted about how she’s gonna be single forever and give up on dating. She asked, “Isn’t there one guy out there, just ONE GUY who will love me and cherish me?” When I brought up that I, once again, would love to do so, she rejected me; AGAIN. FML

I agree, your life sucks 213

You deserved it 584

It doesn't get better as you get older

By Anonymous - 19/12/2022 09:00

Today, I woke up with a stinky smell piercing my nose. Yesterday there was a party at my boss’s house, where I got super drunk and passed out. When I regained consciousness, I realized my panties were wet, my pants were wet, and, of course, the bed was wet. I’m 21 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 213

You deserved it 1 383

Sorry kiddo

By CatastrophicKatie - 18/09/2022 08:30 - United States - Lawrenceburg

Today, I had to back down and buy a popsocket, which I'd declared useless and stupid since they first came out. I had to buy one after dropping my phone on my toddler's head while he was sleeping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 212

You deserved it 1 093

Anger management

By Wife of a moron - 03/09/2025 09:00 - United States - New York

Today, I watched my husband attempt to make Cup Noodles. He used the Keurig to make hot water, instead of the kettle or microwave, then he burned himself trying to pour it, got angry, and smashed the mug and the noodles. I married this man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 212

You deserved it 356

Better safe than sorry

By Anonymous - 14/11/2025 12:00

Today, I was going over my vaccinations when I spotted that I hadn't gotten my Covid vaccine since last year. Not a big deal, my doctor hadn't made a mention of it on the last visit, and I got my flu shot last month. At least it wouldn't be a big deal if my friend hadn't tested positive for Covid last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 212

You deserved it 283

Five bucks

By DreamZ - 24/05/2024 20:00 - Canada

Today, I walked into work feeling confident in my new outfit. It wasn’t until lunchtime that a colleague pointed out the price tag hanging from my skirt. I’d been flaunting my ass's price all morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 212

You deserved it 369

How could you?

By Anonymous - 29/03/2024 10:00 - United States

Today, my mom walked in on me jerking it in her bathroom. I'm a 40 year-old man and she's 68. FML

I agree, your life sucks 212

You deserved it 926

Not now, dude

By Ethan - 09/09/2025 09:00 - United States

Today, during a video job interview, I tried to sound professional by saying, “I always give 110%.” At that exact moment, my roommate burst into the room, holding a burrito and yelling, “You can’t even give 100% to doing the dishes.” The interviewer muted their mic, but I could see them shaking with laughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 212

You deserved it 340

Check these out

By Kylie - 06/06/2024 23:00 - United States

Today, I got all the way until after lunch before I realized my new pants were basically leggings, and that you could see my pink thong through them. I was in a training with a bunch of the guys that work the production floor, and I’m pretty sure they noticed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 212

You deserved it 508

Messy

By Anonymous - 09/08/2025 17:00 - Australia

Today, I absent-mindedly poured the putrid water from the sink’s air trap into the sink that I'd just removed the air trap out of, and flooded the cupboard I then had to crawl into. FML

I agree, your life sucks 212

You deserved it 337

STOP! BAD DOG!

By Anonymous - 08/03/2024 22:00 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, the family dog escaped and I ran after her. She started attacking a random dog, so I started clapping and yelling, trying to get her attention. After I got her away, my hands started swelling. I clapped my hands so hard that they're swollen and bruised. FML

I agree, your life sucks 211

You deserved it 472

Red pill dingus

By Anonymous - 10/06/2024 21:00

Today, my son is refusing to find a girlfriend because, as he puts it, “Them woke bitches just want my money.” He lives alone, has a good job and lots of friends, but he never asks anyone out, and when women ask him out, he practically hisses at them like a feral cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 211

You deserved it 602

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The Top

Today, my little sister was scared to sleep alone, so my parents made her sleep in bed with me. I barely slept, due to the utter terror of waking up to her chanting into my ear in a low whisper, "This is where you die, this is where you die..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 388

You deserved it 3 884

Today, my young son and I were in line at Subway. I guess he got bored and started to insult the teenage girl behind us. I tried to get him to stop, but he wouldn't listen. Eventually the girl punched him in the face and left. As my son cried uncontrollably, everyone else there clapped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 401

You deserved it 59 621

Today, the person I was driving behind put their car in reverse and backed straight into me. I was then yelled at and told, "I had my reversing lights on! Why didn't you move?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 328

You deserved it 1 781

Today, I was patiently explaining to my boyfriend what I liked in bed, after several weeks of unsatisfactory sex. He snapped at me and said, "80% of women fake their orgasms. Why can't you?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 782

You deserved it 182

Today, a mother and son were in my office. The kid wasn't feeling well and threw up. Mom covered his mouth with her hand, creating a vomit nozzle and covering me in puke. She yelled that I deserved to be sprayed on because I was not quick enough in getting a bucket for her son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 416

You deserved it 2 756

Today, I crouched in front of my closet, lost my balance, and broke my thumb trying to steady myself. I'm an artist, and can't work now. I should probably lose some weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 752

You deserved it 298