Ballshot

By Anonymous - 02/12/2022 14:00

Today, I shot my boyfriend in the balls by mistake, twice. First it was a paintball gun I was using with my nephew, then it was a slingshot I use to scare away the bird who keeps eating fish from my pond. He is now sat icing his groin acting like I did it on purpose. FML
I agree, your life sucks 299
You deserved it 982

Same thing different taste

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I can’t help but wonder how you managed to get him in the meat-and-two-veg twice in one day, on two separate occasions, when I feel pretty confident in guessing that his wedding tackle looks like neither your nephew nor a wild bird.

I know the object of paintball is to shoot people and the trajectory of the balls is chaotic. A ball-to-ball shot is a random possibility. But why would you aim your slingshot in the direction of any person?

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Are you saying that if he did not think you’d done it on purpose that he’d not be icing his groin?

I can’t help but wonder how you managed to get him in the meat-and-two-veg twice in one day, on two separate occasions, when I feel pretty confident in guessing that his wedding tackle looks like neither your nephew nor a wild bird.

I know the object of paintball is to shoot people and the trajectory of the balls is chaotic. A ball-to-ball shot is a random possibility. But why would you aim your slingshot in the direction of any person?

1) You could have just told him you are not ready for children. 2) Let that be a warning to him not to cheat. It's amazing how often these Longshot things happen.

I came up behind the last girl, with waist length hair, who kicked me in the balls with a pair of scissors. Somehow instantly her waist length hair became shoulder length. SNIP! Hey! Fair is fair. Right? Why is it women always go for the balls? And expect to get away with it?