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Today, I told my mom I want to get liposuction. She said "Whats the point? Its not like you can get lipo on your face!". FML

#2174
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20008) - you deserved it (3507)

On 01/22/2009 at 10:22am - health - by radiant - United States (Michigan)

Today, my neighbors got a motion sensor light that points at my window. It's so sensitive that it goes off every time an insect flies past. FML

#19601111
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20005) - you deserved it (1541)

On 05/10/2012 at 2:25am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, for the second time this week, I had to ask my 27-year-old husband to stop peeing on the toilet seat. FML

#19399290
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20001) - you deserved it (4280)

On 04/03/2012 at 1:39am - misc - by lizann - United States (Arizona)

Today, I found out about my old school's class reunion, which I wasn't invited to. Everyone has my number and e-mail address. They just "forgot" to tell me. FML

#19448079
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19999) - you deserved it (2406)

On 04/11/2012 at 3:34am - misc - by Girl-with-the-glasses (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while on the bus, a small child asked me if I was having a baby, and I replied "Yes." I'm not. I was just too ashamed to admit I was fat. FML

#20040876
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19998) - you deserved it (9607)

On 08/25/2012 at 11:48am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, a customer smiled, looked me in the eye and described to me in graphic detail the swelling that occurred to his nuts after his vasectomy. FML

#20142730
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19994) - you deserved it (1647)

On 11/01/2012 at 9:52am - work - by tmi. - Australia

Today, my boyfriend borrowed my Jane Norman dress to wear to a Halloween party. He got hammered, threw up all over it, and fell unconscious on the shower floor. FML

#13664079
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19992) - you deserved it (7184)

On 10/31/2010 at 2:25pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I was taking the subway to work when I saw a really hot girl. Noticing that she, like me, had a Dunkin' Donuts coffee, I tried to start a conversation by saying, "Is that Double Ds you have there?" She didn't pick up that I was talking about the coffee. FML

#1466459
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19991) - you deserved it (92683)

On 04/29/2009 at 6:46pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my brother, the plumber, was called to unblock a toilet. Whenever this occurs, he takes a photo of it and sends it to me. It always seems to happen around meal time. FML

#19743294
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19983) - you deserved it (2007)

On 06/06/2012 at 8:55am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I realized just how bad my problem with making eye contact is, when I caught myself looking the other way when the singer in a music video looked directly at the camera. FML

#19522218
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19982) - you deserved it (4341)

On 04/24/2012 at 2:49pm - misc - by suhleedah18 - United States

Today, I was studying for a final when I noticed all I had was a blue highlighter. I decided to drive to the store to get a yellow one. On the way there, I got $200 worth of traffic tickets for not stopping at a stop sign. I basically spent $200 because I prefer yellow highlighters over blue. FML

#278452
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19980) - you deserved it (104648)

On 03/11/2009 at 8:09pm - money - by Noname (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my landlord informed me that from now on, she'd prefer if I paid my rent in cash each month. Apparently, I "look sketchy" and she didn't "ever want to deal with the hassle of a bounced check." FML

#20102772
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19980) - you deserved it (1997)

On 10/05/2012 at 10:56am - money - by sketchball (man) - United States

Today, I worked up the courage to give a guy my number. I wrote it down on a piece of paper, tore it in half and gave it to him. Later, I noticed I'd given him the wrong, blank half. FML

#20142410
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19980) - you deserved it (10359)

On 11/01/2012 at 12:24am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Mexico)



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