Today, I received a single, hand-made Valentine's card from the weirdest kid in the school. It said, "If you ever get mauled by a bear, I hope he doesn't damage your face." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, the only card I got for Valentine's Day was in my mother's handwriting, and she posted it through the front door herself. She still won't admit it's from her. FML
Today, I got an early Valentine's day card. My boyfriend and I recently broke up, and my hopes shot up thinking it might be from him. It wasn't. It was from my parents. FML
Today, I got a reply to my Valentine's Day card that I sent to my girlfriend. I'll get the address right next time because her neighbor is really creeping me out now. FML
Today, I was in class when someone came in with a rose for me. My teacher made me read the card aloud: "I'm breaking up with you, happy Valentine's." It was from my boyfriend. FML
Today, I received the only love letter I've ever gotten. Too bad it's from the guy who's been stalking me. FML
Today, I went out and made build-a-bears that looked like my daughter and her new boyfriend. It turns out she had been insisting that I didn't for a good reason; upon sight of his, her boyfriend screamed and fled the house. Turns out he was nearly mauled to death by a bear. FML
Today, someone thought it would be funny to steal the precious stuffed bear I've had since childhood and leave a ransom note in its place. FML
Today, I sent a guy in my English class a rose. He's kind of an outcast, so I though it would be a nice gesture. I asked him later how his day was going and he said, "Good. I got a rose this morning, but I could tell it was from a guy. The handwriting was awful." FML
Today, I had an art class with my girlfriend. The teacher assigned "anti-cards", or cards for unusual or bad occasions. My girlfriend decided to make a "break-up" card, and I helped her write the poem inside it. After class, she gave it to me. FML
Today, we wrote Valentine's Day poems in class. I wrote a very depressing poem about how I was rejected by all the girls I like and how it hurts to be alone. When it was read to the class, they laughed and told me it was hilarious. Even the teacher. FML
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Top comments
ambowew 7
Feel special, he cho-cho-chose you!
neal001 0
Hey, feel special. At least someone likes you.
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Comments (276)
ninjaniki 0
be grateful you got something! better than nothing
kbobcat 0
That's a rage!!
pronounciations 5
Aw, how sweet.
WillfulMurder 0
He was trying to be funny, don't take it literally.
RaggleFrock 13
It's a little early to be handing out cards. But weirdos need love too.
jku 14
Seconded- if I got a creepy valentine, I'd be flattered! Cus you know- I haven't gotten a valentine since elementary.
doctorwhogirl 0
- I bet if he wasn't weird then you would think it was funny because I have seen this card online and I thought it was funny- it's supposed to be "if you ever get mauled but a bear with chainsaw hands I hope he stays away from your face because you're cute."
OhbbyCx 6
That sounds like an Oatmeal original. ;)
DarkestHowler 0
You guys never heard that before? :0 "I hope if you get mauled by a bear with chainsaws for arms, he stays away from your face cause you're cute"
shanemaximo 7
What's your problem? Would you rather the bear damage your face? Geez.
bunny911 16
That's so sweet! So he's the "weirdest kid in school"? That generally means they're socially awkward. He likely doesn't know the socially acceptable ways to flirt, and was simply expressing himself in the only way he could think of. Be flattered that someone so awkward had the guts to give YOU such an expression.
jizzwold 21
92 here is a box with my left ear in it. Marry me? Am I doing it right?
jessimica642 8
He got it wrong is a bear with chain saw arms lol he got it of the Internet
drlove78843 6
92- it doesn't work that way.
AssassinsCRB 0
1 is that you in your pic? Looks like britney spears lol
THEsuperMANLYman 10
Awww isnt that sweet
Maartje 0
ok, thats original
x_KL_x 7
Actually, compared to the standard everyday valentines card I'd say it is.
amrik 11
It was on Ifunny
GigaPudding_fml 24
It isn't that original though, I've seen the pic online a couple of times, although then it says: "If you ever get mauled by bears, I hope they stay away from your face because I think you're cute"
burpburpburp 5
Thanks hipster. No one needs constant reminding of "I already saw that". Everyone knows from your sepia-stained lifestyle choices how ******* cool you are. People like you who have nothing to contribute other than, "I already saw that" are ruining society. It's not a race to see who can consume the most drivel on the Internet so you can spout off about it. Please STFU.
MechaFright 2
I got that exact card for valentines day when I was in high school around 2004/2005. I saw it floating around multiple times after I got it myself--it's really common around the internet and it surprises me that not more people recognize it. Not really "hipster" to make note of that
GigaPudding_fml 24
Hahaha, wow, relax please - I wasn't trying to be hipster (and I wasn't trying to start a fight either)
Colonel_Lexi 18
It was HANDMADE too! I'd accept something handmade rather than store bought any day!
NomNomMuffin 5
That's happened to me before ...
knifeywifey 0
Freaking oath it is :p
neal001 0
Hey, feel special. At least someone likes you.
SecretMe00 5
OP must have a gorgeous face.
SoultheWolf 19
Its the thought that counts? o-o
ambowew 7
Feel special, he cho-cho-chose you!
theunwiseone 4
Me fail English? That's unpossible.
Jannettecooks 1
Unwiseone you must be old... Every valentine card set for elementary school kids has one with a train or a Pokemon that says that. Get it now?
poprocksss73 7
I was thinking Simpsons...
theunwiseone 4
Least somebody spotted it :-)
LivingProdigy 0
To to today jr
Havin 19
My cats breath smells like cat food.
poprocksss73 7
So... Do you like stuff?
Incredible_92 11
I LIKE XBOX!!
ShutUpAndStare 7
PS3 FTW (>^J^)>?
finished 10
Awesome simpsons reference:)
harkerk87 3
You are quite beautiful
vierachtdrei 3
It might be a sign he has a savage side, and you're his next victim. ;)
ambowew 7
What a masochist!
SpruceDread4578 13
Sounds kinky ;D
Namerkp2 8
I think he took dating advice from Rodney Alcala (look him up if you don't know)
TheChad85 1
But at least her face will be salvaged! Lol
DjeePee 25
Even the weirdest kid in the school can love someone.
boofgall 16
Agreed, I dated the "school freak" and everyone made fun of him. We dated for 3 great years, and were best friends for 5. They can turn out to be pretty amazing people, those "weirdos".
Protocol07 1
9's picture looks relevant to her comment. As well as op's admirer.
Shadow_Phantom 26
Wh-what? He sends you something nice and you have this sort of reaction? All I can really do is YDI, since there's no "where exactly is the FML, here?" button.
Shadow_Phantom 26
Okaaaaaaay. Clicked on the rules. "Please don't post any comments which question the validity of an FML (accusing the original poster of submitting a fake story, or arguing that an anecdote is "not FML worthy" or "even "not an FML" based solely on your own personal intuition or opinion isn't very fair. Furthermore, it ruins the other users' reading experience)." Honestly, this rule is a load of rubbish. it's not like I'm being rude when I post.
Epsilonyx 15
Send one back saying "Roses are red, violets are blue, I want u 2 suck my phalanges xoxo" with a picture of Nicolas Cage's face on a cupcake.
wolverinez4life 6
Or saying roses are ****, violets are ****, I like ****, ****
Metal_Chick 15
Or saying roses are like wolverine, violets are like dicks, if you join them together that's what he is!
boofgall 16
112- I'm assuming the poetry section in English for you wasn't very fluent?
poprocksss73 7
How sweet