Today, I arrived home. I'd left for a business trip 5 days earlier, and trusted my husband with our young boys. As soon as I stepped in the door, I noticed my son had thinner hair than when I'd left. He then showed me an empty container of Nair. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I came home from a long business trip. I walked in the front door to see my house was a complete mess. The first thing my son said was, "Did you bring pizza?" FML
Alexa, play "I'm Doing Fine" by Day One
Today, I returned home early from a week away for work. I was worried about my husband's mental health after a week alone with our two ADD kids. He wasn’t expecting me, but I was surprised to see the house cleaner than it had ever been, and our children happily reading on the couch. How did he do that? FML
Today, while my mother-in-law visited, I asked if she wouldn't mind watching my son for 10 minutes as I had run out of baby shampoo. I came back home to see she had shaved his head completely bald. That was his very first haircut. FML
New man
Today, I arrived home, having just had my long hair cut and my beard shaved. My idiot daughter’s reaction when she saw me? “Who are you and how did you get in the house?” FML
Assumptions
Today, I left my husband in charge of the house for a day. When I returned, I saw him gaming through the window, so I stormed in and yelled at him. Then, my eyes adjusted, and I saw the neatly folded laundry, clean kitchen, vacuumed rugs, and my son, who was asleep until I woke him. Whoops. FML
Today, I left my son with my husband while I went to the store. Ten minutes later, my dog was missing a large patch of fur, and neither of them can stop laughing. FML
Today, I asked my kids if I looked good before going to work. Smiling, they told me I looked wonderful. It wasn't until I got to work and looked into the mirror until I noticed my left eyebrow was gone. FML
Today, I returned home from a three-week vacation. None of my friends realized I'd been gone. FML
Today, me, my boyfriend and his family stayed at an AirBnB while on a trip. While I was doing my makeup, my boyfriend told me he was going to take a shower. A few minutes later, I went in the bathroom to shave my legs thinking my boyfriend was in there, but his dad was in the shower, scrubbing his ass. FML
Today, I left the house for a while and when I came back my husband was wearing my lacy lingerie. He looks better in it than I do. FML
Top comments
rahrah765765 11
Child : what's this daddy? (holding nair) What child heard daddy say *'that's what daddy uses on his head'* What daddy actually said "that's what daddy uses, so he gets head"
dva976 7
Maybe you shouldn't leave the nair within the child's reach. Just sayin'...
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Comments (94)
docscientist 10
Are you trying to say it's the husbands fault?
borntoperform 14
Well if they're very young, they shouldve been supervised. But if they're over 6 or 7, then it's the boys own fault.
AlaskanEskimo34 0
At least they weren't hurt, coulda been worse
Keyman1212 14
I'm sure it's hard to supervise two young boys, they're probably pretty wild at that age. Not that I'm saying it's an excuse for them to misbehave! But part of the blame also lies with the mother, who I'm going to assume was the proud owner of said Nair.
StoryOfTheYear 15
Psh. Who cares about the hair, the house was still standing.
hellbilly205 17
I'd say it was a winning situation. The house is standing, none of them are dead, hair grows back, and you returned safetly to your family.
XanderJayNix 17
#7 is right, could have been worse. Kid could have drank it instead of using it.
girl112891 7
I think what the real FML here for her is the fact that her husband is not responsible enough to take care of the boys without her. BUT it is a funny story to remind the kid about when he's older lol my mom would ask me if I remember when (insert childhood story) and I would laugh and wonder what went through my young head!
docscientist 10
You can only keep a leash so short on a child. They will and do get into trouble. The kid getting into nair would take all but a few minutes of being alone, especially if they found it while using the restroom. To blame the husband is silly.
AmbrosiaWriter 17
#29 - Actually, that product (Nair) can do some serious damage and I doubt the child used it as instructed on the bottle since he thought it was a good idea to use it on his head. Those chemicals burn away the hair and its imperative that the directions are followed (IE on the skin for no more than 10 minutes or you start getting chemical burns.) Also, it causes hair to grow back thinner/less each time it is used, so the child could have done permanent damage to his hair. The fact of the matter is, if the Dad wasn't paying attention to the son to see that he was playing with dangerous chemicals, imagine if the child had ingested it rather that just slathering it all over his head!
hellbilly205 17
its ok #65 guys dont need hair
subwoofa 0
How is it the mothers fault? She left on a business trip and left her trustworthy husband in charge. She had no choice but to leave. Her fault how?
lifeguardd 0
Its never the hussbands fault..
Zya_fml 8
Oh dear...hussbands?
Keyman1212 14
Well duhh it isn't the hussbands fault, because hussbands don't exist.
techweed 12
Excuse me... But I believe it is spelt hußbands.
xSonic 9
It's never the whyves fault either
rachel_potter 13
Wow... Such a big fuss about what was obviously a typo
StoryOfTheYear 15
32- Hundred bucks says a world war starts someday because some idiot sends an email with a typo.
lifeguardd 0
Losers
aidanpoopnuggs 0
Pooop
Funnywayz 0
#60 You wouldn't have to say that if you had spell checked.
wutzup 0
It's always the womens fault lol
dva976 7
Maybe you shouldn't leave the nair within the child's reach. Just sayin'...
Laurenlou 24
Does no body on here realize how curios kids are? OP didn't have to have it "in reach" for the child to get to the Nair. The son was probably digging in a cabinet or climbing on top of a counter. I'd also like to point out that anyone thinking the husband messed up everything is not correct. OP's husband might have been dealing with the other son while this son was going on a scavenger hunt.
desireev 18
Well said 18!
kjcookie10 9
If your kids are young like aforementioned, then understandable on being so curious. But if you're talking about like 15 year old... I would be worried.
Laurenlou 24
59- I agree but the FML says "young boys." If they were around 15 the FML would probably say "teenage boys."
Pentium_4 27
how old is he? probably did it himself
GoW_Chick 15
Of course! Him and his friends were having a prank war and filming it for YouTube. Ahh YouTube where the masses go to get their 15 mins. of shame and fame.
girl112891 7
Well, it wasn't the father! Last I checked men only shave their heads, while nair and waxing is left to us ladies.
ladiesman219 4
He wanted to make cancer people not feel alone.
elephantom12 9
You're an ass.
cosmosis 12
What kind of comment is that you fucktard?? How is that even meant to be funny? Clearly you have no idea what a cancer patient goes through!
realworldrox 5
What's nair???
xrainbowshadowx 17
It's hair remover :o
A100893 30
Hair removal cream/gel.
leadman1989 16
What gay guys use one their assholes so they can get their salads tossed... what? was that offensive? My bad "urkle voice"
StoryOfTheYear 15
I would've said "get their salad dressed", but then again I probably wouldn't have posted that.
margie2194 12
Why do people always attack the gays? Like really, it's not funny at all...
disconinja924 5
gays dont belong in america. just my views. it isnt natural, and its quite disturbing,
skata 4
57- Rick Santorum?
AwkwardNinja22 5
No. It isn't. You know what really is disturbing, though? The number of LGBT kids that kill themselves because of prejudiced cavemen like you.
jamescrazy96 17
#53 how did gays get brought up???
A100893 30
Kids do stupid stuff. Especially when non-kid stuff is in reach. Keep him away from stuff like bleach and rat poison.
ImInYourFACEbook 8
Stupid? Kids are like mini geniuses. They do things that no one else would think was possible. Using Nair on our heads is going to be the new thing, just you wait.
rahrah765765 11
Child : what's this daddy? (holding nair) What child heard daddy say *'that's what daddy uses on his head'* What daddy actually said "that's what daddy uses, so he gets head"
maddyyghee 6
Hahaha
Juju123187 2
Your husband is a complete **** up. Obviously he wasn't paying attention and this could have been prevented. I'm sorry OP
StoryOfTheYear 15
In five seconds a kid can do a lot more than just get away with using a bottle of Nair. I doubt OP's husband was encouraging the situation so he can record it and post it to YouTube. Give a guy a break.
MsCupcakelover99 3
Lol
ladyLALAA 29
Umm... Man hater, much?
omarzrgz 3
I really dislike feminist assholes like you. Not all feminist, just assholes feminist like you.
natashax21 5
At least he's a boy and boys tend to atleast shave their heads anyway. For a girl, that'd be disastrous. Try not leaving that stuff out with mischievious boys around next time.