Kids: You're under arrest

You're under arrest

By poo_shoe123 - 31/03/2009 20:47 - United States

Today, I was called by my 9 year old son's teacher. He had handcuffed himself to his desk with handcuffs he found in my room. I was told to please bring in the key and not to leave my kinky toys out where a child could get them. I'm a cop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 107 605

You deserved it 10 232

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Same thing different taste

By hfs palm - 21/06/2015 21:37 - United States

Today, my husband let my 8-year-old twins play with handcuffs. I thought my husband was pretending he had lost the key but after 4 hours, he walked in with his head down and said, "I've made a terrible mistake honey." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 636

You deserved it 2 539

Reported!

By thatcreepyteacher - 17/02/2016 04:27 - United States - Mchenry

Today, someone called the police on me because one of my students was going home with me every day. The student is my son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 828

You deserved it 1 435

By Anonymous - 30/04/2012 04:44 - United States - Buena Park

Today, I had to take my 15-year-old daughter to remove the handcuffs her father had placed on her as a joke. He didn't know they were real. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 851

You deserved it 2 517

By ihateteenagers - 30/12/2010 02:12 - United States

Today, a punk-looking college kid was making fun of my mentally handicapped son. Out of anger, I punched him in the face. I got handcuffed and thrown into a police car. The kid stood there laughing and pointing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 568

You deserved it 10 071

By notthatkinkyanyway - 13/11/2011 12:46 - China

Today, I'm on holiday with my boyfriend. Going through Chinese customs, an officer pulled us aside, removed a suspicious metal object from my boyfriend's luggage and called six other officers to have a look. It was a kinky pair of handcuffs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 533

You deserved it 6 384

What's your emergency?

By Anonymous - 06/04/2020 23:00

Today, I found out that because I'm a cop, my 5-year-old son thinks the only way he can contact me is by calling 911. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 821

You deserved it 308

Temper tantrum

By "QueenCortana Tiffany Turner" - 07/02/2020 14:00

Today, the cops were called to my apartment because my daughter had a temper tantrum while I was at work. She was naked when they were there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 331

You deserved it 293

By Jay - 04/11/2017 04:00

Today, I got called into the principal's office of my son's school. Why? He'd called his teacher a "fudge packer". No more weekends with his uncle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 286

You deserved it 356

Mad lad

By Bob H. - 26/10/2014 13:54 - Canada - Québec

Today, my son asked for my help with a personal matter. I was flattered that he trusted me, since he's a paranoid, untrusting psycho. Turned out he wanted to use my locksmith skills to break into his ex's house and "teach her a lesson" for breaking up with him after he cheated on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 796

You deserved it 5 414

By swarm20 - 05/02/2013 05:24 - United States - Mankato

Today, I called security at my school because I left my mittens in a classroom and it was locked. When the security officer showed up, he asked if the mittens I was looking for were the ones on my hands. I even had to take one of them off to call them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 500

You deserved it 52 395

13BlackCat 2

Wednesday 1 April 2009 2:44

why that is the first thing that came to his teacher's mind i don't know. my first thought was cop. i think the teacher has his or her mind in the gutter

shorgenfunkel 0

Wednesday 1 April 2009 2:49

Go to the school in uniform.

Comments

tincan 0

Thursday 2 April 2009 10:18

Wow. The first thing I thought of is a police, too. What was the teacher thinking? I agree with 158. Show up in your uniform. XD

PTERONOPHOBIA 0

Thursday 2 April 2009 14:28

I would like to know where the **** a cop is ALLOWED to put his handcuffs if keeping them in his own bedroom is irresponsible. You guys are tools.

brwneyedgrl1989 0

Thursday 2 April 2009 14:37

Thank you #160 thats what i was trying to say last time, if people knew how to read they would realize the handcuffs were in the parents bedroom not in plain sight where the child could find them!

drunkenatheist 0

Thursday 2 April 2009 15:22

@ 144: THANK GAWD SOMEONE SAID IT. I'm so glad that I'm not the only person who thinks encouraging cops to act like power tripping jerks is a good idea.

jackoffasaur 0

Thursday 2 April 2009 18:39

okayyy then ******* explain it to the teacher your idiot...you could have said "i'm actually a cop" which would take 2 seconds rather than bitching about it here.... ****** pigs