Today, I heard my boyfriend making the same noises while cleaning out his ears as the ones he makes whenever we have sex. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I realized my boyfriend makes the same noises in bed as he does when he's winning in Call of Duty. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting it on. At one point, he started to kiss my ear. Then, he stopped, went into the bathroom, and came out with about four Q-tips. He then said to me, "Just take care of your ears, then I'll continue." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He decided to make gun sound effects as he came. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I heard my parents going at it upstairs. He said, "sounds like they're having more fun than we did." To make it worse, he crept to their door and put his ear to it, telling me what he heard. FML
Today, I noticed my husband makes better sex sounds on the toilet then he does with me. FML
Today, I said to my boyfriend that he makes the same noises when he smells bacon as he does when we have sex. Now everytime we have sex, he whispers "Bacon..." in my ear. FML
Today, I was having sex with my new boyfriend, and I realized that he enjoys making airplane sound effects while inserting himself inside of me. Moment ruined. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML
Today, my boyfriend found out it makes a funny fart sound when he blows hard into my mouth in the middle of making out. I can't get him to stop doing it every time we kiss. FML
Today, I heard my boyfriend masturbate next to me and then relieves himself on my bed sheets. FML
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Top comments
grahmagog 14
Clean your ears more often and you'll understand why
ManInTheMachine 20
Sounds like he found his q-spot.
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Comments (89)
Pleonasm 36
It's all about the cochlear dunking.
RoboCunnilingus 23
He's doing it right.
TogeBara 12
That shit is euphoric...I don't get off to it myself, but it feels good man. You should blow in his ear lightly next time you are intimate with him. That should really get his guns blazin
jenn1808 16
Haha I mentioned once that my ears are sensitive and now my boyfriend thinks it's hot to blow in them like a hurricane. Not so sexy in practice.
LaLince 40
It's normal. Don't worry.
Wizardo 34
Nothing better than putting the Q-Tip in and giving it all you have... orgasmic.
onorexveritas 24
its pleasurable to some
RedPillSucks 33
Does he ejaculate as well?
Wizardo 34
Yes his ears started to produce obscene amounts of cochineal fluid...
Elgeehache 4
You should be happy you give him pleasure like that of an eargasm.
Vlad567 5
I think I the past life he might of been a ferengi lol
Californialuvv 7
are you sure bout that?