Today, while pulling into my driveway, I slightly bumped into something. My wife. I'll be sleeping on the couch for a while. FML
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By
baconftw
| 9
How did you not see her?
By
ahabsfan
| 14
You should have taken out the bitch completely. Fail.
COMMENTS
By
baconftw
| 9
How did you not see her?
Reply
keepcaImcarryon
| 0
i have a perfectly reasonable explanation to this. his wife was making a snow angle in the driveway before BAM :D
Reply
KYLAisaBITCH
| 4
Could you, by any chance, explain what a "snow angle" is?
Angel***
Angel***
Reply
GrooveSponge
| 0
Oh goody. The Grammar Nazis have invaded. ANNYWAYS OP, I could definitely see how you could do that! She could have been wearing very neutral colors and blended in!
Reply
keepcaImcarryon
| 0
26 or "kylaisaBITCH" (haha i see why) don't try to make yourself look witty or funny. we both know what I'm trying to say. unless you're an idiot, i'm pretty sure you can comprehend the word. kthxbai! cheerz!
Reply
Damn_Hippster
| 11
I like how OP tried to make it seem like it wasn't a big deal at first by using the word "slightly"
Reply
YayFlameWarz
| 9
The only time I see Grammar nazi'ing to be appropriate is if someone is dumb enough to mix up your and you're.
Reply
girlygeek004
| 8
Or where, were and we're
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StoryOfTheYear
| 13
The worst is when someone actually types out they're instead of there/their.
Reply
n_epic_fail
| 14
"slightly bumped into something" OP you probably ran her ass over.
Reply
Theclarksondales
| 8
maybe she's a Ninja, although then she might have dodged it.
Reply
horneyhic
| 15
U can make this work if she's been trying to lose weight say " uve lost so much weight I didn't see u there"
Reply
XxDaniEmoxX
| 0
I wonder how "slightly" op hit her.
Reply
LukaInTheSky
| 3
Seriously? Y'all have some arbitrary rules about which homophones should be used correctly and which ones we should just let go?
Snow angles is too funny to let go.
Snow angles is too funny to let go.
Reply
Melinadesu
| 3
The real issue here is referring to your wife as "something" and not "someone". Women are not objects.
Reply
nava1210
| 12
106 - it's obviously to build suspense into the FML
Reply
Rapt0rJesus
| 0
Now you know why love is blind.
Reply
truthurt47
| 0
Why do people on FML always worry about, if they spelled something wrong and if so they go HAM on them. FYL if you care I spelled this wrong. Stfu n smc
Reply
truthurt47
| 0
. . . .____
__(. . . . . )====: :
/ LOLTANK
O.O.O.O.O/ beep beep
__(. . . . . )====: :
/ LOLTANK
O.O.O.O.O/ beep beep
Reply
divadro102
| 16
106 - He bumped "something" only to find out it was his wife.. I think he would have said he bumped into her from the beginning.
Anyways; "You're the greatest THING that's ever happened to me..." < How about 'thing' here, is it inappropriate?
Anyways; "You're the greatest THING that's ever happened to me..." < How about 'thing' here, is it inappropriate?
Reply
alexgabriel
| 0
Hi
By
rexgar2000
| 10
was she laying on the ground or something. and it's an accident I don't think shell kick u out ti the couch unless she's a bitch.
Reply
Justforlolz
| 14
"Engrish" must not have been your strongest subject at school...
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EvilPotato
| 14
52 I don't think he had a "subject" at all.
Reply
lilemmy55
| 10
Dude, he hit her with his carr.. Ovbiously theres gunna be a punishment ._.
Reply
Awsemogreeb
| 19
Car*
Obviously*
There is*
Going to*
Obviously*
There is*
Going to*
Reply
geon_olam
| 17
Hey 52 at least he used it's correctly that's pretty rare
Reply
assgas
| 0
He's in the fucking army. Shut the fuck up and suck your own dick.
Reply
tswift89
| 2
Some people use mobile, get over it
By
ahabsfan
| 14
Too many negative votes, comment buried.
Show the comment
Reply
thisisafunnyname
| 12
"Sorry, I had a foot spasm so I floored it. Not my fault, I couldn't control my foot"
Reply
Mindvirus
| 2
^faip
Reply
Mindvirus
| 2
Fail*
Reply
bobbycorwen
| 5
^Fail
FAIP : Flooring All Idiot People
FAIP : Flooring All Idiot People
Reply
bobbycorwen
| 5
You are right. I just caught that.
Shoot...
Shoot...
Reply
aceman1992
| 9
Yeah if you're gonna run over your wife you got to go for broke and just floor it.
Reply
crymore007
| 11
I was expecting the first reply to 3 to be from a feminazi...oh well
Reply
Rapt0rJesus
| 0
fial? Seriously
By
tsim_fml
| 0
hey uncle phil!
Reply
screamo_neve
| 12
The fuck is Uncle Bill?
Reply
shazza26
| 1
*Phil
Reply
screamo_neve
| 12
Oops.
By
alexh15
| 13
Some guys actually enjoy sleeping on the couch. It's kinda like camping.....
Reply
YayFlameWarz
| 9
Now get: a tent, fire wood, matches, marshmellows and bear repellent or i suppose in this case wife repellent.
Reply
nahgemsoohc
| 0
6- hey! Some girls too!
Reply
SpruceDread4578
| 13
43- I honestly read that sexually...unless that's how you meant it..idk.
By
daydreamer244
| 13
Maybe you need glasses.....?
By
uprising_fml
| 0
well shit .
how did you manage to pass driving school in the first place ?
how did you manage to pass driving school in the first place ?
By
Maxine17
| 8
Oooh hell hath no fury like a woman scorned...
Reply
torchhh
| 1
She got bumped, not scorned
Reply
lenamartinovic
| 13
Your quote reminded me of Castle. ;)
By
JinxosGirl87
| 0
Apparently your wife's car bumping fetish didn't go as planned.
Reply
me_gusta_eso
| 1
That joke was awful.
Reply
graham11
| 14
10- I feel so much pity for you right now.
Reply
XeroGravity
| 3
Awe. Mang. Fuck 'dem. That was funny to me..
By
alexiiiis09
| 0
You're lucky she didnt take an early start into digging your grave and making you sleep in it