Heavy sleeper

By good_aim - 27/07/2013 08:03 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I returned from a long business trip a day early to surprise my wife. She was sleeping, so I climbed into bed and started spooning her. Thinking I was an intruder, she simultaneously kicked me in the groin, elbowed me in the ribs, and smacked the back of her head into my jaw. FML
I agree, your life sucks 48 290
You deserved it 26 877

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Top comments

At least you know that she wont get robbed without fighting back


At least you know that she wont get robbed without fighting back

Damn OP, can I take lessons from your wife? :o

Royalistic 8
Zimmington 21

Plus he knows she's not cheating

LMFAOwned 9

Well at least you know your wife will be fine when you're away! :D

At least you know she'll be safe when there is an actual intruder...

Do actual intruders crawl in bed with her and spoon her?

Hes climbin yo windows snatchin yo people up tryna rape em... You guys could finish it right?

skyttlz 32

I'd thought this was gonna say he caught someone else in bed with her.

MeowZebraMeow 7

58 - Me too! Congratulations, OP; Your wife is faithful.

Yeah, in my variation, OP managed to lie right on top of him. That'd be surprising enough.

Must say halfway through reading the FML I assumed this would be how it ended. Nice to hear its not for once ;)

olpally 32

Well, good to know she can protect the house like a boss! :D haha. Damn, that had to hurt though! Lol

It sounds more like he's married to Gracie Hart (she remembered S.I.N.G. - well, she forgot the I)

On the bright side, she can protect you from evil. She's like the Fifth Element.

CallMeMcFeelii 13

This has to be one of the most influential comments I've ever read. I will, from this day forth, live my life by the code of sucks to sucks!

hcollins1 18

Thats shitty deal. But least you kno she can take care of her self

dontgivafuk 9

apparently the "w" was just too much work!