Today, while in our communal showers in the highschool football locker room, I started to swing my penis around because it feels good and I was alone. Two minutes later the rest of the team hops into the shower with me. 30 dudes, one self-induced boner. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got naked in front of a girl for the first time. Too bad it happened when my "friends" pulled down my swimsuit at a party. Everyone saw my penis. I got a boner. FML
Today, I was forced to get up in front of ten swim teams, including my own, and a hundred spectators to swim 100 yards with an obvious boner sticking out of my suit. FML
Today, I realised that my body has its own masturbation cycle; while I was out shopping, I heard the intro music to my room-mate's favourite video game, and popped an uncontrollable boner. FML
Today, I was showering at hockey practice. It would have been business as usual, if not for one of my teammates playing with his junk and not-so-subtly asked me to connect. There are 5 more months of hockey. FML
Today, my roommate spends so much time in our dorm room that I got a boner when I heard him leaving for class, because it was my first chance in days to jack off in peace. FML
Today, we were swimming in gym class. There are some cute girls in our class and they were wearing their bikinis. I was looking at them when I got an erection but since I was underwater I thought no one would see. I'm on the diving team so my teacher asked me to demonstrate a dive to the class. FML
Today, while I was showering in my dorm, a hand reached through the curtain and grabbed my ass. I hit the person on the other side of the curtain. He opened the curtain, thinking that I was his girlfriend. He apologized, then went on to have sex with his girlfriend in the shower stall next to me. FML
Today, I was sexting my girlfriend when I accidentally sent one to my swim team’s group chat. This means that 19 men got a picture of me flexing with everything on display. Worst part? I got more compliments from them than I ever got from my girlfriend. FML
Today, I was peeing at a urinal, when the man next to me finished up and shook his penis. I got splashed. FML
Today, while lifeguarding over children at work, I started thinking about my girlfriend and got a hard on. Before I realized it, I saved a kid and then hopped out of the pool next to a 5 year old in front of my managers and a little over 50 patrons with a raging boner. My HR meeting is tomorrow. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
MCart_fml 0
Remember only 2 shakes are appropriate in the bathroom, anything else and you deserve the embarrassment..
FMLhilar 0
hahahahahahaha thats just embarassing
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (81)
Anniebbyx3 1
lol @ 44 omg "Raging boner" rofl! ahahhahaha
NoveltyErasers 0
That's why I could never be in sports.. I would have a boner all of the time if I was in a shower with thirty other hot sweaty guys.
mcsteamy88 0
nice!
b2ac 0
agreeded!
dabears554 0
Wow, you're a loser to the extreme. Why would u do anything like that in a locker room, or anywhere that's not your house!?!?
pepper005 0
HAHAHAHAHA that's hilarious. and #10 and # 42 HAHAHAHA nice.
mischiefkel 17
Where's 10?
basketballbabee 0
smart.
Hugeness 0
This is pure genius. I've done that before.. just not popping the wood. It's called the helicopter FYI.
devastatron 0
there is so much wrong with you. first, why swing your dick around? second, how does one get a boner from swinging a dick around? third, if you feel yourself getting a boner, why not stop whatever is inducing that boner? i just don't get it This is a previous post, and all I can do is but wonder, why would you not swing your dick around? Doing the helicopter is SO fun, so challenging to see how many spins you can get. And yeah, it gives you a boner, and I can help but wonder, are you female? Do you know how hard it is to make a boner instantly go away on command?!?! That's like sucking the blood out from your erect penis back into the rest of your body...what is there NOT to get besides this guy made the honest mistake of doing it in a communal shower haha
domino57 0
holy shit. reading the comments on this as a girl is quite entertaining. the idea of guys "helicoptering" - hahahaha. oh how i love football players : )
arienh4 0
#55 Keep in mind, not all guys do this. I think it's kinda stupid or immature really, not sure which.
evhrocks876 4
You're kinda stupid or immature really, not sure which
MissFortune_fml 0
Taking note of what #56 said it's nice to know there is some hope. :s On the OP, as a girl all i can say is... weird. And embarassing. But mostly weird. :s