Today, while I was working in the liquor store, I was trying to impress my hot boss by lifting three cases of Grey goose. Turns out I can't, and I'll be working for the next two months of the rest of my summer paying it all back. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, while working as a cart attendant, I found one of my coworkers on a lawn chair sipping on a Bud Light in the parking lot, while we both were supposed to be working, leaving me to push carts by myself. My boss comes out to me catching my breath and tells me to work harder. FML
Today, I was at work, cleaning up a construction site. I picked up a beer can and accidentally spilled some of it on me. My boss came in to check on me and thought I was drunk. Instead of getting a raise, I was fired. FML
Today, it's day one of my suspension and probably being fired from my job. Why? I accidentally took a beer out my bag instead of a soda, then got distracted working to make sure everything got done. FML
Today, it was my first day at work as a waitress. The day ended with me owing my employers money, after I accidentally smashed an expensive bottle of wine on the floor. FML
Today, at the winery, my boss proudly made a spectacle of the new, high quality bottles. After over a year of employment without breaking a bottle, I shattered three before lunch. FML
Today, working in a liquor store, I had to tell a girl I couldn't sell her alcohol since she was severely intoxicated. She told me to "cash me ousside, how bow dat?" then smashed a bottle of wine and left. FML
Today, I got a badly-needed job at a local discount store. After being hired, I found out I'm to help with the soon-to-begin store closing sale, and I'll be jobless again after 3 months. FML
Today, a pretty co-worker invited me out for drinks after my shift. I have no money left until payday. Embarrassed, I had to decline and go home alone. FML
Today, I'm a cashier in a grocery store. The visiting regional manager tore me a new one for being lazy. His reason? After working a double shift with no break, I decided to sit down for a minute when things got slow. FML
Today, to get my coworker fired, I spiked his coffee with whiskey. Joke's on me, he's apparently enough of a drunk that it didn't affect him. Then I dropped the bottle as I was leaving for the day, cut up my ankle, and I'm now suspended. FML
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Top comments
Aelaena 6
..because lifting alcohol makes you seem cool
maupa 0
Way to go... Use your brain next time, not muscles ;)
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Comments (117)
rmamets 0
YDI. Find a job without hot bosses, you won't do stupid things to "impress" them.
Peroxide 3
bl dude, the last time i lifted 3 cases of gray goose all the ladies in the store wanted to have sex with me stay classy
knowlove 0
i find your comment to be very humorous
Jimboom 12
She probably would have been more impressed if you had followed health and saftey regulations. Now she just thinks your a liability and an idiot.
OmniFML 0
You could work it to your advantage. "Sorry about dropping those crates, I just needed an excuse to work with you as much as possible. ;)"
lyndis_fml 0
try not to break anything else while you're paying those off.
tWitt3rBuG 0
YDI, that's just so stupid! I mean what are to odds that your boss would've been impressed by that? Uh, hello!
Sawadee 0
she probably likes you more now......since you are FREE
passwordvixen 0
you should've done really cool bartending and fixed him/her a drink, now that's impressive.
ApatheticJay 0
You really must be weak. Grey Goose comes in cases of 6 and really aren't that heavy.
Godless25 0
depends on the bottle size, pints come in 12, and 1.75 liters come in 3, and the cases of 3, believe it or not, are heavier than they look
24788 7
Your her bitch now. That may not be a bad thing though.