Today, when my boyfriend reffered to my hair, I told him I was going to dye it. He responded by saying, "finally, so how much you going for, 40, maybe 50 pounds?". I said dye it, not diet. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I decided to dye my hair to freshen up my appearance. I asked my husband for his opinion, expecting him to recommend a color. He then asked me why going on a diet wasn't my first option. FML
Today, while watching TV with my boyfriend, I was telling him that I wasn't looking forward to "getting older" and turning thirty in three days. Five minutes later, he said, "I never knew you had so much grey hair already" and then offered to help me dye them. FML
Today, I had my hair done for the first time in 3 years. I loved it. My boyfriend told me I look like his ex. FML
Today, my therapist told me that I need to do something different with my hair. Then I paid her. FML
Today, I dyed my hair back to pastel pink, which it hasn't been in over a year. It goes well with my skin and I was super excited about it so I decided to Snapchat my friend about it. Her response? "You were thinner last time your hair looked like that." FML
Today, my boyfriend of 6 months started a bitter fight with me. The cause was me repeatedly refusing to dye my hair the way his beloved ex did. FML
Today, I went to go get a haircut and I asked how much it was for a haircut, shampoo, and a blow job. I meant to say blow dry. FML
Today, my husband threw a fit because I dyed my hair bright magenta. Funny, I actually dyed it three days ago. He literally just noticed. Shows how much attention he pays me. FML
Today, my fiancé and I had a fight because he wouldn't let me get what I wanted to eat, even though it was my money. He said, "It's way too many calories. I'm supposed to help you lose weight." When I pointed out that I had given up a month ago, he looked at me and said, "Yeah, I can tell." FML
Today, after months of my (now ex) boyfriend telling me he wished I was blonde with big boobs, I finally retaliated with "I wish you were a redhead with a big dick, but you don't see me complaining." He cried and said I should love him for who he is. FML
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Top comments
TryToBeKind 0
That's when you respond with, "Actually, I meant dye-it, as in my hair. But you're right, I DO need to lose weight - about 250* lbs of it. In other words: it's over. Get.out." *or whatever boyfriend's weight is
actonthat 0
I can't stand that people act like she's committed some horrible sin for not being a size 2. If it's easy for all of you to be skinny, that's really awesome, but for some of us it's a real struggle. I've been fighting to stay a size 8 since I was in my early teens, because I just lost the genetic lottery and got a sucky metabolism. I don't stuff my face (I actually also have IBS, so I can't eat very greasy or rich things), and I'm very sensitive about because I can't stand when I'm feeling down about my weight and people act like I've made some conscious decision to not be a stick. That's not how it works. So shut the **** up. And OP, this guy is an ass, dump him. I'm lucky enough to have a cute boyfriend who doesn't like women with the physique of small boys. The one really awesome thing about not being a size 2: I have boobs. :D
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Comments (137)
massesareasses 0
As a kinesiologist I am tired of obese people blaming their weight on issues that are outide of thier control. This is completly false. A small fraction, less than 1% possess genetics that make it more difficult to maintain a healthy weight. However well over 99% of obese individuals lack the self respect to take care of their bodies. They would rather blame it on something else or eat for comfort. It is true everone has a differnt rate of metabolism. However metabolism rate is not random. It operates based on our environment and needs. Theres a reason why somone like micheal phelps requires over 10 000 calories/day and an inactive elderly woman requires around 1000. Exercise requires energy. Energy expenditure dependes on intensity and duration. Even at rest, each pound of muscle requires an incredible amount of energy to be maintained. This is the main reason why men require about 1000 calories more per day. Metabolism is not a set thing and can be changed depending on an individuals lifestyle. FAD DIETS rarely work! There is only money behind these diets and very little scientific evidence. There is no quick solution! You have to realize its not what you eat its how much you eat! Fat is an important part of your diet. The body requires fat to function properly. Also fats keep you satisfied longer and less likely to over indulge with snacking. THE KEY IS MODERATION! It is simple math, calories in = calories used, in order maintain bodyweight. A change on either end will flucuate body weight. Losing 1-2 pounds per week is safe and realistic a goal. However It does require work. On a personal note, I am tired of fat individuals, taking offence to thir significant other informing them to lose weight. Especially if you are 40 to 50 pounds overweight. Obesity cause depression, sickness and early death, there are way too many studies to refute this. OB you are luckey that he is with you, cause I know I sure the hell wouldnt be.
salsera13 7
Maybe if you could spell at all your arguments would be more credible. I agree with them all, I just wish you wouldn't make the rest of us like-minded individuals look retarded by spelling horribly.
whatevs80 0
#93, while the science you speak of is true, your last comment shows your true ignorance. How do we even know if she is 40 or 50 lbs overweight? What makes her so lucky just because he is with her, he could be an ass. And what makes you so great that anyone would want to be with you? OOOOooo you're a kinesiologist, I guess that's why.
KKhang 0
Haha, did he try to cover it up by saying Duh, I meant pounds as in the currency of the UK!
kiltkrazed 0
Why do people always get ticked off at the person who's suggesting the FML'er should lose weight? It's pretty obvious that she's grossly overweight... he wouldn't throw numbers out there like 40 or 50 lbs if she was only 160 or something... and #9, i don't think ANYONE - male or female - chooses personality OVER looks if they have any real choice. Why wouldn't you at least go for someone with both? My gf has a pretty face, nice booty and tiny tattas... I love her to death and most days she's got a good personality too... most days.
mambrow 0
I agree with #93, #74 is obviously a liar.
cecilia_weasley 0
#1 is right. Drop that ************ now and don't look back!!!!!
MagneticGuitar 0
He was just joking...
jmok222 0
#1 = Epic Response.
that_guy_you_are 0
YDI for being fat.
GiannaxRevenge 0
WOW #101. Asshole. #1 = WIN. And I had to learn this the same way, and I got the same response, so now I say I'm going to color it. Except when I'm around black people, I also learned that the hard way.