Health: Today, the plant on my windowsill fell and landed in my face...

By Username - 15/07/2011 19:51 - United States

Today, the plant on my windowsill fell and landed in my face while I was napping. It's a cactus. FML

agreeclassic 44 213

vote type 1 7 951

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By Ouchhh - 25/05/2010 06:54 - United States

Today, I leaned back and bumped into one of my mom's plants in the window. The good thing was that I caught it before it fell and shattered. The bad thing was that my mom likes to keep cactii in the window. I can still feel thorns I haven't managed to pluck out yet. FML

agreeclassic 29 923

vote type 1 4 560

By Anonymous - 27/10/2017 06:03

Today, I purchased a cactus in a cute little pot and put it on my windowsill so it could get sun. Unfortunately, that's also where I have my alarm clock. Guess which one I grabbed in the morning. FML

agreeclassic 2 243

vote type 1 2 706

By thanksdad - 16/03/2014 19:28 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I found out what it feels like to be slapped in the face with a potted cactus. FML

agreeclassic 46 833

vote type 1 6 297

By Anonymous - 29/02/2012 16:52 - United States

Today, I rescued a cactus from a lethal fall. It thanked me with a handful of spines. FML

agreeclassic 10 416

vote type 1 33 019

By TheSublime - 21/10/2009 13:54 - United Kingdom

Today, I was helping a friend redecorate. She had put up some shelving, that we presumed was stable. It broke, and all the expensive vases and collectables fell to the floor. On instinct, I leapt forward to catch the closest thing. It was not the expensive vase. It was a cactus. FML

agreeclassic 37 878

vote type 1 4 659

It hurts when I pee

By yomamma787 - 24/11/2009 17:11 - United States

Today, I was outside, peeing on a cactus. Then all of a sudden my dog jumped on my back, knocking me into the cactus. FML

agreeclassic 14 906

vote type 1 54 469

Shout the victory

By dogpatch087 - 02/01/2020 03:00 - United States - Ventura

Today, while climbing a mountain, I got to the top and then put both of my arms up in a victory kind of way only to trip on a rock and fall into a cactus plant. FML

agreeclassic 1 798

vote type 1 509

By Anon - 24/03/2012 02:42 - United States

Today, while hiking and wearing sandals, I stubbed my toe. This wouldn't have been so bad had it not been into a cactus with 3 inch thorns. FML

agreeclassic 12 418

vote type 1 32 308

By Anonymous - 31/08/2014 17:51 - United States

Today, I was hiking down a steep hill, and I slipped. I instinctively grabbed the nearest object to me: a very prickly cactus. FML

agreeclassic 39 527

vote type 1 3 877

By romea244 - 14/08/2011 08:17 - United States

Today, I was working on my new house and I was taking out a large cactus. While picking up the pieces to throw away, I noticed a spider on my forearm. Without thinking, I swiped at the spider with a piece of the cactus. I missed the spider, not my forearm. FML

agreeclassic 14 664

vote type 1 27 083

GigaB 0

Saturday 16 July 2011 0:38

don't sleep under a cactus?

redbluegreen 40

Saturday 16 July 2011 1:27

Faceplant.

Comments

TBMFan 0

Saturday 16 July 2011 0:56

well Duhh , Dont Sleep Near it >.

tacocannon99 5

Saturday 30 July 2011 1:34

Ok your picture turns me on bigtime.

textwork 4

Saturday 16 July 2011 1:01

ouch

tyler063093 0

Saturday 16 July 2011 1:03

my dog

tyler063093 0

Saturday 16 July 2011 1:03

my dog

karimshao 1

Saturday 16 July 2011 1:05

sounds like a big lie!

Person1233 12

Saturday 16 July 2011 1:06

... and then a million spiders crawled out of it?

hottiebrunette 0

Saturday 16 July 2011 1:11

talk about "cact-eye"

clancey6 4

Saturday 16 July 2011 1:14

The plants are after us! Plants Vs. Zombies... I mean Humans!

bigbadtim 7

Saturday 16 July 2011 1:15

Try numbing the pain with some tequila.

sarcasticbloom 0

Saturday 16 July 2011 1:15

in your face.

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Today, I stole my brother's fuzzy slippers for the day as I usually do. Too bad he had been anticipating this and had left a mouse trap in one of them. FML

agreeclassic 16 584

vote type 1 45 130

Today, my girlfriend left me for my best friend. Over a text message with "lol" in it. FML

agreeclassic 46 996

vote type 1 3 894

Today, I wanted to take my girlfriend to a nice dinner before prom. Her parents followed her in, and joined us to "keep an eye on me." They interrupted all our conversations, ate an expensive meal, then got up and walked out when the waitress brought the $95 check, leaving me to pay for it. FML

agreeclassic 59 747

vote type 1 4 484

Today, my husband was arrested because a fox, fleeing from about a billion dogs and rich twats on horses, jumped through our car window, and cowered between my legs. He got out of the car, waded through the dogs, and pulled one of the twats off his horse into a puddle, ruining his red coat. FML

agreeclassic 1 789

vote type 1 263

Today, unbeknownst to me, my boyfriend got a tattoo of the Joker on his neck. The worst part? It's Jared Leto's godawful Joker. FML

agreeclassic 864

vote type 1 149

Today, I was fired for not having a reliable mode of transportation. I’ve only had to take the bus recently because three days ago, my boss’s son was messing around in the parking garage, lost control, and totaled my car. FML

agreeclassic 5 386

vote type 1 220

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