By Anonymous - 30/05/2012 22:35 - Italy - Milan
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OP - "Hey honey, you know... I've been feeling a little..." Gf - "A little what? Get on with it!" OP - "Well I think we should, you know..." Gf - "Get married?! I knew that's what you were going to say! You WERE going to say that right...?" *Cracks knuckles* OP - Yes! That's exactly what I was going to ask! Will you marry me? Please don't hurt me..." Gf - Of course I'll marry you. Now get your sorry ass out of my house. OP - "Yes m'am." That sounds about right.
Not quite sure if this a FYL, or YDI. I think I'm coming to the conclusion that it's a little of both: FYL for being in an abusive relationship, but YDI for not having the cahones to get out of it, and for digging yourself a bigger hole to lie in. Hopefully you will be able to get out, before you get married or God forbid have children. Good luck to you.
You sir have what's known as Ken-doll-itis it's the comical lack of any male anatomy meaning it's not really your fault you lacked the necessary boulders to perform the oh so scary task of dumping a girl this rare but serious disease has effected the dickless men through history and I'm sure docbasterd could back me up on the disease. Get checked out there is hope for u yet
pussy, you can aswell lock your tiny pee pee in the chastity cage and be ready to serve her as a cuckold because that's what you deserve for being a feminine sissy! no one will ever respect you EVER!!! damn weaklings, im glad you will never passs your genes to the next generation!
You'll be surprised how abusive partners can mentally trash your confidence to do anything for yourself. This guy probably has very low self-esteem (caused by the girlfriend). I understand the feeling; I've been in a relationship like this before and it's surprising how much control the partner has. I feel sorry for you OP, but you've GOT to break up with her, or you'll never get your life back on track.
#67-- Exactly. If OP were a girl in an abusive relationship, you know that everyone would be sympathetic. No one tells abused women to "Just leave" because it's obviously not that simple. Yet when it's a guy being abused, people think he's just being a pussy. What a double standard...
I would agree, except that many people do say "just leave him". They're only sympathetic to the abuse, but still express that the individual is an idiot for staying with him. The only double standard is that people don't care about abuse towards men. And yes it is that easy...
It definitely is not that easy. It took me several attempts to break up with my partner; he always turned it around and made me feel more like I needed him. Now, months later, I'm still recovering from the severe depression and anxiety that started during the relationship, as well as many other things.
123, Then I would argue that you're either gullible or a little mentally weak. You'd surely be able to see through the bullshit otherwise. Breaking up with anyone is going to be difficult, but I don't think it is really any harder to do it in a situation of abuse unless you fear they may come after you and hurt you later. Theres no way you'd end up engaged. 131, It could go either way on that one, though I do think people would be more sympathetic in general to her cause, it is difficult to say whether ending up engaged would shift the perspective a bit. 243, That is the stupidest shit anyone has said so far. Congratulations, you take the award for the dumbest person on this FML.
245 - Actually, 243 is right. If you bothered to look into her argument instead of cursing her out then you might have realized that there was some truth to it. Instead you chewed her out for not agreeing with an argument that appears to be supported entirely by you wishing reeeeally hard for it to be true. Sorry, but I don't think that makes her the dumbest person on this FML. It just demonstrates your inability to handle facts that don't validate your world view.
Seriously 245? Get an education. Or use google. Everything I said was completely factual. I could understand you insulting me if you disagreed with my opinion but my comment wasn't laced with bias like yours clearly is. Men have a biological propensity towards more aggressive behavior due to hormones such as testosterone. Fact, not opinion.
"And while there are always exceptions, the generalization exists for a legitimate reason." Legitimate reason? You think being an ignorant jackass is a legitimate reason? WOW. I really have no words for how stupid you all are. If you people honestly will say that it is not absolutely absurd that people would disregard any form of abuse of men simply because males are generally built to be dominant and aggressive (and therefore we assume that it seems ridiculous that any female would engage in such behaviour? Oh God...no...just...no) then you are all fucking moronic. Does the word "empathy" mean nothing to you? Why am I needing to explain this point? Are you all that fucking dense? If someone is being abused, they are obviously not in a dominant position ESPECIALLY in a society that explicitly FORBIDS men to lay a hand on a woman. It is in no way a ridiculous concept that a man would be the victim of abuse...I really hope it's just that I'm tired and have misread this whole thing.
you definitely misread the whole thing. she was saying that generally men are more dominant etc and therefore people are less supportive of an abused male because they assume he should have the balls to stand up for himself. no one was saying that that's the right thing. thats my take on this anyway. I might be wrong
I was saying that the generalization exists because there's biological proof to back it up, not that we should generalize every situation. And I did mention there always being exceptions. You're still reading farther into my comment than what I'm actually saying.
you'll hear a lot of people say to just leave him because it seems obvious, but beneath everything if they were once a couple very very much in love they will always have an image of what they could be like if said partner changed. some people just love the idea of an extremely happy relationship and constantly dream about their partners changing to be who they possibly used to be. they're not weak, some people don't understand the difference between being in love and loving the idea. I'd also like to say, abuse works both ways, there's many women who physically abuse partners also us women can be manipulative bitches sometimes!
Well jus like woman who sleep around are hoes n men are studs. Welcome to the world. Men are less likely to report abuse donors not the norm and ppl don't think that's the first option when hearing stories like this. Men can be in abusive relationships, they jus tend to be more verbal. But please don't start with the double standard shit cuz that's crap!
There are biological differences between races, but that doesn't make double standards between races okay. Abuse is not exclusively physical. Women tend to abuse verbally or manipulatively (like falsely accusing men of rape or refusing to let them see their children, repeatedly verbally assaulting them, public humiliation, stealing/controlling their money, etc.) STILL JUST AS BAD. Even if the woman WERE abusing physically, it's stupid to think that stereotypes or differences in strength mean she can't hurt a man. For example, if a child stabs an adult with a knife, IT STILL FUCKING HURTS. You guys may be lucky not to have been abused by women, but don't underestimate the damage they can do. Seriously people. I can't believe some of you are trying to justify abuse with stereotypes.
268, That's not how it reads at all. 295, Every generalisation exists for a reason. Theres a reason to back up ANYTHING. Even Hitler has a "reason" for the bullshit he pulled. What you said was there is a "legitimate" reason, which is a completely different thing altogether. Saying there is a reason based on biology for this, then following it up with "and I agree that it is a load of bullshit that people would think this way" would have left me going "I completely agree". You didn't. You left it with "And while there are always exceptions, the generalization exists for a legitimate reason" which suggests that men being abused is only unacceptable in "exceptional circumstances" not as a general rule, because men are built to be more aggressive and therefore should just "man up". There are no words for how stupid such an opinion would be.
You're not exactly one to talk about generalising given that you say I'm weak-minded and gullible for being unable to end an abusive relationship. Ever heard of Stockholm Syndrome? Read up on it. But thank you, for being enough of a douche to insult the girl with severe depression, about one of the REASONS she's depressed.
I said there's a legitimate reason the generalization exists, not a legitimate reason for people to have disdain for every abused male in a relationship. I was simply remarking upon the origins of said double standard but I never condoned it, in fact I think women can be just as if not more abusive at least in the emotional realm. Maybe I didn't make that clear and if so, I understand why you read my comment differently. Generalizations exist because people look at small bits of factual evidence and allow their biases to influence every associated incident.
341, ...I didn't say generalising is bad...its necessary in many cases. I said its unacceptable to overlook someones abuse because guys need to man up. Don't get me wrong, I think it's terrible that you were being abused - assuming it's true - and in no way do I think that you deserve it. This is the point I am making, that people will act as though abuse towards men isn't an issue. I am however saying that leaving an abusive person should not be more difficult than leaving anyone else assuming no increased risk. I have actually ended a relationship with an emotionally abusive partner, which went horribly, but I knew that the situation was fucked up and logically wouldn't give in to the feelings of remorse and sympathy. Since this is clearly an issue you can't discuss objectively I'm not going to bother any further.
342, And now we are on the same page :P 352, I know right?! I came here for LULZ not this actual discussion bullshit, and if thats what I'm here for, then that's what everyone should be doing! LULZ! ROFLOLZ! ROFLOLMAOWTFBBQ!!!!!111one Every time someone complains that people are discussing something real it makes them look like a slow minded buffoon.
71-actually, woman are considered the weaker sex. So we are bound to get more sympathy than a guy would, simply because men have worse tempers, and tend to be jyst more aggressive in general, and also are usually stronger. And people are told to "just leave" there abusive partner. But it doesn't always work that way.
If you have to be engaged, at least try to tell her how controlling she is. If it doesn't change anything, dump her.
176- I think 172 meant the actual wedding would happen, a date would be set... Cause ya know, engaged just means engaged, some people can be engaged for years. So, with that said, your little 13 year old ass needs to pull that stick out of your ass. There was no reason to refer to him as a smart ass. As I see it, he wasn't being rude or a "smart ass" to you in anyway. So. As I said, pull that stick out of your ass. Thanks!