Today, my roommate and I were walking to a bar and a group of guys shouted out at us "Hey, it's like we're on Animal Planet, I see a zebra and a gorilla." My roommate was wearing a zebra print shirt. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, as I was walking out of a restaurant with my boyfriend, I saw some guys checking me out. One of them walked up to my boyfriend and said, "Dude, you and your girlfriend have matching moustaches!" FML
Today, a group of friends and I went out to a fancy club together. The doorman checked us out and let everyone in. Everyone except me, that is. The doorman's reason: "Her face looks like a baboon's arse." My "friends" all went in anyway, leaving me to walk all the way home. FML
Today, I was walking at a section of the zoo where you are in the cage, and the monkeys are climbing outside of the cage. I was having a great time until I looked up and one of the monkeys urinated all over my face. Not only did everyone see, but there was no way for me to shower for six hours. FML
Today, I walked in on my dad introducing his stuffed gorilla to his cat. FML
Today, I got mugged by someone wearing a bear suit. FML
Today, I met a really nice guy. He was funny, handsome, and we were both into each other. He told me his name, and when I replied with mine, it came out sounding like, "I'm a bear." FML
Today, I went to the zoo to see all of my favorite animals. When I got there, I realized they must've all been on strike or something, and refused to come out of their enclosures. FML
Today, my mom and I went to the mall to look for some boxer briefs. While looking, I saw two girls I knew from school, so I went over to say hello. At least, that was my plan, but my mom screamed, "Look! These have dinosaurs on them!" They left the store giggling. FML
Today, I was at University when a giant mascot started walking in my direction. As they walked past, they whispered my name seductively. I still don't know who it was. FML
Today, I woke up, ate breakfast, and left my dorm room, only to see about half a dozen people and my roommate shuffling around in the hall. Their zombie outfits and limping were so realistic that I freaked out and ran back inside, screaming. They think it was the greatest prank ever. FML
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Top comments
jazminbliss 2
then shout back "yeah and I see a bunch of asses"
Exhumed91 0
You should have asked them if they want to do it like they do on the discovery channel
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Comments (115)
MukyDaCookie 0
As racist as it is to suggest it, the OP is most likely a black woman/man. "Monkey" is a slang term for a black person because of some theory which states they were the earliest human. It is entirely possible for the guys to be yelling that out because they person is black. Don't call someone racist when they are just asking something. If he had said "That's what you get for being black you ****** bitch!" Then I would completly agree that he needs to be tortured and killed. I hate racism and ignorant fools.
Phallus_fml 0
Number 52: I couldn't agree more. Fair enough!
ButterFly_16 0
I quess that makes you the gorilla :(
soluminia 0
shit that sux but then again maybe you shouldnt be you forgot it wasnt halloween
genius_man16 1
BAHAHAHAHAHAHA ok, sorry, but that's pretty funny uncalled for and mean? yes but still funny
grazynaanka 0
Don't listen to the ones making racist comments. They are ignorant, stupid people, who only make comments like this because they can hide behind a computer. I dare them to go to Brooklyn where I live now and say that to someone. They wouldn't. Because they are immature, scared little bitches. OP:That was really mean of them to say. I would have laughed it off. Or do what #39 suggested. Lol.
EpicBoobs 0
Umm.. how do you look? xD
lmmmr 0
Gorillas are awesome though. Far more intelligent than those guys.
iLIFE 0
what a bunch of donkeys, get it donkeys, jackasses? lmfao.
so_me_fml 0
I'm with #52. I think #22 chose his or her words poorly, but I imagine that the intoxicated jerks yelling at the OP were idiot racists.