Today, my eldest son decided he’s a vegan now. My wife is a tomboy deer hunter, so she announced to our other four kids we are all vegan until the eldest changes his mind. It has been two full days of teenage sibling guerrilla warfare in our house. Plus, the food is tasteless shit. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my son is a vegan who keeps talking about how Just Stop Oil are technically the good guys. My wife won’t stop crying because she thinks we’ve failed as parents by raising an arsehole. I've had a migraine ever since this argument. FML
Today, my vegan sister told my kids where meat and dairy products come from, in a very detailed way. They now refuse to eat meat, and want to, "rescue all the poor animals." FML
Today, even though I told my son I had vegan burgers for him, he brought enough vegan food for everyone at a barbecue, and tried to get everyone to try it. Not one person ate a damn bit of it, and he’s now crying, all while blocking our drive with his car. FML
Today, my brother turned into a fanatical vegan, and while I was eating my scrambled eggs, sat across from me glaring and whispering, "fried embryo, amniotic fluid" the entire time. I have a feeling i'll be eating most of my meals in my room from now on. FML
Today, my daughter came home from school crying hysterically. Apparently, her teacher is a vegan douchebag who told the whole class, "If your family eats meat, they're eating your future!" Now she screams when we eat meat. FML
Today, my daughter said she wanted to be vegetarian like me. Beaming with pride, I made her plant-based burgers for dinner. She took one bite, screamed, "EW!" and started crying and begging for beef burgers. FML
Today, I got home to my daughter in tears because her dad decided 5 was the ideal age to tell her the chicken, bacon, and mince she eats every day comes from dead chickens, piggies, and moo cows. I now have a vegetarian 5 year-old and I’m seriously worried about malnutrition and stunted growth. FML
Today, my boyfriend spent half his paycheck on gourmet steaks, bacon, and all sorts of other meat. When I reminded him we were trying to go meatless to help the planet, he said, "Yeah, I'm done with that. The planet can burn." We'd only been vegan three days. FML
Today, my roommate decided to go vegan after watching a PETA video. She began this new-found lifestyle by throwing out all of the non-vegan items in the house, including some prime rib we had recently purchased, all of our ice cream, and my chocolate stash. FML
Today, my roommate decided to go vegan and threw all of MY meats, cheeses, chocolates and even beans for some reason in the trash, because he "doesn't need that kind of toxic waste" in his life. FML
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Top comments
Vesi 30
I'm an omnivore but if one of my kids chose to go vegan than I would do my best to find tasty alternatives for that person and help them learn how to make them for themselves. This is emotional abuse and your wife really needs a lesson in empathy.
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Comments (2)
DLBL 23
Your wife is smart to make the siblings bring vegan-boy to his senses.
Vesi 30
I'm an omnivore but if one of my kids chose to go vegan than I would do my best to find tasty alternatives for that person and help them learn how to make them for themselves. This is emotional abuse and your wife really needs a lesson in empathy.