Today, my mother-in-law gifted us with a new microwave. I told her it was too much and we didn't really need it. Her response, "I just want my grandkids to have food that tastes good for once." I'm a chef. FML
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Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I offered to help my mother-in-law boil noodles for some noodle soup. She loudly said, "You know how!?" I'm a chef. FML
Today, my grandmother has been complaining that I spend too much on food, so I started cooking food from scratch. I happily showed her my recipe book and encouraged her to try a few. She then mocked me for wasting time by not buying frozen food. FML
Today, my mom still hasn't gotten over the novelty of our brand new microwave. We've been eating hot pockets for nearly a week now. FML
Today, my mother-in-law gave me a toaster and a fork as a wedding gift. FML
Today, due to my wife saying I never cook and that we always order pizza, I spent a good hour preparing dinner. While serving it to my kids, they started complaining. My wife told them to shut up. When she took a bite, she looked up at me, smiled, and said, "Do you, you know, want to just order pizza?" FML
Today, I felt bad about rarely complimenting my mom about her cooking, so during dinner, I raved about her incredible, creamy, macaroni and cheese. It came from a box. FML
Today, I was telling my friend how much I love my 20-year-old kitchen scale, because it has this one handy function that even new ones don’t have. Later, my mom melted it on the stove and isn’t even convinced she should buy me a new one. FML
Today, I overheard my mother telling a friend she got me oven mitts for Christmas. I got her two cruise tickets. I hate to cook. Which she knows. FML
Today, the nicest thing said to me all day was from my microwave, which flashes "Enjoy your meal" when it finishes cooking something. FML
Today, my mother-in-law came over for dinner. She decided to salt the food I was preparing without even tasting it first, then complained at dinner that I'd used too much salt. She then lectured me on the proper seasoning of food for the rest of the evening. FML
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Top comments
I_am_stupid_also 6
Just tell her, "I know what you mean, my husband said he had to eat the dog's food behind your back when he was growing up so he didn't starve."
kionnalexus 0
What a bitch >.
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Comments (104)
AaRL_fml 0
Microwave her cat.
I_am_stupid_also 6
Just tell her, "I know what you mean, my husband said he had to eat the dog's food behind your back when he was growing up so he didn't starve."
plexico 4
You're a chef, but your mom thinks you make food that tastes bad? I don't get it. Maybe she thinks your food is too bland because you cook with plain ol' store-bought meat, and the real tasty stuff is possum, raccoon, skunk, armadillo and other road kill. Any other ideas?
I_am_stupid_also 6
DO NOT COOK AN ARMADILLO IN A MICROWAVE. You've been warned.
ElectricEel 0
You forgot squirrels. Those furry little bastards are the best, especially with A1 steak sauce.
fawfulster 11
plexico, it's her mom-in-law, that'd make more sense.
plexico 4
I zipped through it a bit too quickly. I'm used to dealing with literate people like you fawfulster who know enough to hyphenate mother-in-law. I'm sure a mother-in-law thinks they need a microwave to cook the sushi.
mina_8 0
This is what you get when you try to be "nice" and don't accept gifts. She already bought it, just say "Thank you," and accept it.
GreenAlbatross 3
Whenever she's over, make really awful casseroles in the microwave and serve them to her. Make it up to your kids by taking them out for ice cream after she leaves.
rockstarK9 0
Wow, what a ******* ****, FYL.
jessxoxo28 5
in-law's.... wat did u expect?
KBear816 0
sounds to me like the bitch in law might just be jealous.
LOKIM8 0
just because you are a chef doesn't mean you can cook for shit
krad204 21
I think that if someone is willing to pay OP for cooking, then OP can cook well.
movies12 0
She is jealous.... Who gives a **** what ur mother in law thinks.