Today, my mom called me a bastard, told me I should run away, and said I don't deserve to live in her house. All because I didn't use a plate when I ate a Poptart. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my mom tried to ground me. In the apartment that I own. Because I didn't eat enough of the dinner that I'd made. FML
Today, my mom called me a bastard because I asked for the Target gift card my dad had given to me. FML
Today, my mother called me a "wasteful child" because I threw up my lunch. FML
Today, I came home from school and went upstairs to sit on the balcony. I walked past my mom and said hello. She then got mad at me because I didn't ask how her day was. She said I should stay in my room and that I don't deserve dinner because I don't value her tasks in the house. FML
Today, my dad screamed at me, called me a monster, told me he wanted me to move out, and that I better start looking for an apartment. Why? I slammed the microwave door. FML
Today, my mother gave me a reprimand for my table manners when I didn't ask for someone to pass the vegetables I could have gotten myself. She then let out a raunchy fart at the table, and had the nerve to yell, "Did you ask to be excused?!" as I vacated the area. FML
Today, my mom called me a "heartless bitch" for eating the last Hot Pocket. This is coming from a woman who, just last week, faked having cancer to get out of a speeding ticket. FML
Today, my mom slept all day. But when she got out of bed for five minutes, she told me I was a worthless piece of shit. Then she went back to bed. FML
Today, I received a 7-page text message during school from my mom yelling at me because I ate her cereal. FML
Today, I decided I need help, so I confessed to my mother that I'm bulimic. After she looked it up online she started screaming at me for "Wasting food that I'm not paying for." FML
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Top comments
_Vamp_ 9
Well, you should've used a goddamn plate you wreckless hobo. You and your poptart-no-plate eating shenanigans. :)
s0m3guy2010 21
I've heard that can be punishable by death in Texas. Just be glad you're alive.
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Comments (138)
varkey 7
If it is feasible, just take her advice and leave, why would you want to deal with a piece of shit mother like that ever again? FYL
sirpunsalot 0
Well that was sure crumby of her...
Nickel05 15
i have a feeling theres an ugly backstory with this post. this no plate thing was probably just the boiling point.
HomeAl0ne 20
My thought exactly. I bet he was busted eating it out of between his gay cousin's buttcheeks (serving suggestion only).
BearBear1213 0
You sound like my gf who got kicked out today for saying she had a headache.
brooks10101 1
Time to leave and never speak to her again no contact no nothing perhaps u can mail her a turd every christmass but nothing elts till sheas dead thatle show her muahahahhahah
millerbee74 6
And how many times has she had to ask you to use a plate before this?
NagatoPain 4
I dont see why everyone is saying the OP is an asshole if all he did was eat a pop tart!? Geez! People cant understand anything nowadays! Go ahead and click the thumbs down! Idc! ^_^
Xr70r7 4
Bastard means motherless. Whata fail.
rubberduckie94 13
basrard actually means nobody knows who dad is.
wickedevaa 4
There is so much more to this story than a poptart. Ydi
powershot_fml 5
Asain parenting?
BeibertSmitor 10
The important question here, is what kind of poptart was it?
brat1995 2
Lmao I would have been like I wouldn't be a damn bastard if u wouldn't have slept with so many damn men mother!